Consider the Simian
@valmonline.bsky.social
help help the computer!!! it's after me!!
he/him
he/him
"Go to hell" is basic. "I hope your favorite underplayed EDH archetype gets a massive wave of support in a Universes Beyond set everyone hates" is smart. It's possible, it's terrifying.
November 12, 2025 at 1:14 AM
"Go to hell" is basic. "I hope your favorite underplayed EDH archetype gets a massive wave of support in a Universes Beyond set everyone hates" is smart. It's possible, it's terrifying.
Jane's recipes are amazing!! I batch cook them and have them at work for lunch it's sooooo nice
I have until Friday to get £408 to pay for rent this month.
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
I'm a black trans woman fighting poverty and homelessness.
To support myself, I set up a patreon where you can get access to all my recipes, poetry, artwork and photography for just £5.
Something new EVERY SINGLE DAY. You won't regret it.
http://patreon.com/fightingpride93
To support myself, I set up a patreon where you can get access to all my recipes, poetry, artwork and photography for just £5.
Something new EVERY SINGLE DAY. You won't regret it.
http://patreon.com/fightingpride93
July 30, 2025 at 10:43 PM
Jane's recipes are amazing!! I batch cook them and have them at work for lunch it's sooooo nice
Reposted by Consider the Simian
I have until Friday to get £408 to pay for rent this month.
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
I'm a black trans woman fighting poverty and homelessness.
To support myself, I set up a patreon where you can get access to all my recipes, poetry, artwork and photography for just £5.
Something new EVERY SINGLE DAY. You won't regret it.
http://patreon.com/fightingpride93
To support myself, I set up a patreon where you can get access to all my recipes, poetry, artwork and photography for just £5.
Something new EVERY SINGLE DAY. You won't regret it.
http://patreon.com/fightingpride93
July 29, 2025 at 4:57 PM
I have until Friday to get £408 to pay for rent this month.
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
You get 16% off if you sign up annually and if 9 people do that I'm covered.
You get literally 1000s of posts, over 800 recipes for £5 a month and more added every day
Please just give it a try. You improve my life and can cancel anytime
sometimes ya therapist hits you with mind crush and you're after the session like
January 23, 2025 at 8:54 PM
sometimes ya therapist hits you with mind crush and you're after the session like
socks are puritan bourgeoisie if you think about it because feet should be shared by all workers
January 11, 2025 at 10:50 PM
socks are puritan bourgeoisie if you think about it because feet should be shared by all workers
Reposted by Consider the Simian
Reposted by Consider the Simian
We're just innocent men
December 2, 2024 at 9:58 PM
We're just innocent men
Reposted by Consider the Simian
can someone come to my house and kill me
December 2, 2024 at 4:59 AM
can someone come to my house and kill me
Reposted by Consider the Simian
November 29, 2024 at 6:36 PM
yessss I've done it I've finally cracked raise the past the trick was go all in you aren't a midrange deck they can't sunfall you if you've looped your whole graveyard twice in one turn!!!
#mtg #mtgstandard
#mtg #mtgstandard
November 23, 2024 at 12:56 PM
yessss I've done it I've finally cracked raise the past the trick was go all in you aren't a midrange deck they can't sunfall you if you've looped your whole graveyard twice in one turn!!!
#mtg #mtgstandard
#mtg #mtgstandard
god has spoken to me directly and said i must build and obsess over a graveyard based creature deck in mtg standard and i say oh lord what of sunfall? what of rest in peace? and he simply says "figure it out gayboy"
#MTG #MTGStandard
#MTG #MTGStandard
November 19, 2024 at 6:06 PM
god has spoken to me directly and said i must build and obsess over a graveyard based creature deck in mtg standard and i say oh lord what of sunfall? what of rest in peace? and he simply says "figure it out gayboy"
#MTG #MTGStandard
#MTG #MTGStandard
Reposted by Consider the Simian
*the refs announce a head slap penalty* I’ve never heard of that penalty, I wonder what that means
*the replay shows a big guy slap another big guy’s head real hard* oh that makes sense
*the replay shows a big guy slap another big guy’s head real hard* oh that makes sense
November 19, 2024 at 3:37 AM
*the refs announce a head slap penalty* I’ve never heard of that penalty, I wonder what that means
*the replay shows a big guy slap another big guy’s head real hard* oh that makes sense
*the replay shows a big guy slap another big guy’s head real hard* oh that makes sense
Reposted by Consider the Simian
Absolutely gutted that Magic: The Gathering is just becoming the next Fortnite-style mishmash of IP. Maybe I'm just old and bitter, since I've played for *a little while*, but it just feels like the game has been in decline for a while, and that decline is just getting faster and faster.
October 26, 2024 at 7:47 AM
Absolutely gutted that Magic: The Gathering is just becoming the next Fortnite-style mishmash of IP. Maybe I'm just old and bitter, since I've played for *a little while*, but it just feels like the game has been in decline for a while, and that decline is just getting faster and faster.
Man i wish Wizards of the Coast would print more precons for standard like they used to!
*Monkey's Paw finger curls*
*Monkey's Paw finger curls*
October 26, 2024 at 9:55 AM
Man i wish Wizards of the Coast would print more precons for standard like they used to!
*Monkey's Paw finger curls*
*Monkey's Paw finger curls*
being a siivagunner guy is exhausting you spend 20 minutes trying to find the english acapella version of the opening to an anime you've never seen and the whole time you're getting japed by snoop dogg and flintstones because every rip is titled (alpha mix) or some bullshit
October 4, 2024 at 1:58 PM
being a siivagunner guy is exhausting you spend 20 minutes trying to find the english acapella version of the opening to an anime you've never seen and the whole time you're getting japed by snoop dogg and flintstones because every rip is titled (alpha mix) or some bullshit
Yknow they say shoplifting is hard but I'm feeling like I've got this one in the bag
April 18, 2024 at 3:33 PM
Yknow they say shoplifting is hard but I'm feeling like I've got this one in the bag
you're always your own worst enemy in fun house mirror fight club
April 17, 2024 at 11:43 PM
you're always your own worst enemy in fun house mirror fight club
learning that there were gay people on the titanic! will the casualties of wokeness ever end. smh.
March 19, 2024 at 4:40 PM
learning that there were gay people on the titanic! will the casualties of wokeness ever end. smh.
feeling like such a wifeguy rn my girlfriend has done something sooooooo good and I'm so proud of her and like it was hard work getting here and I'm so proud of her did i mention that omfg
March 14, 2024 at 5:38 PM
feeling like such a wifeguy rn my girlfriend has done something sooooooo good and I'm so proud of her and like it was hard work getting here and I'm so proud of her did i mention that omfg
*stepping up on stage at the fremen open mic*
"I'm going balls Muad'deep"
"I'm going balls Muad'deep"
March 13, 2024 at 9:23 AM
*stepping up on stage at the fremen open mic*
"I'm going balls Muad'deep"
"I'm going balls Muad'deep"
Kate Middleton dissapeared because they gave her the Water of Life attempting to recreate Queen Elizabeth the Second
she gained her ancestral memories but is possesed by Abomination and keeps trying to claim sovereignty over India
she gained her ancestral memories but is possesed by Abomination and keeps trying to claim sovereignty over India
March 12, 2024 at 7:23 PM
Kate Middleton dissapeared because they gave her the Water of Life attempting to recreate Queen Elizabeth the Second
she gained her ancestral memories but is possesed by Abomination and keeps trying to claim sovereignty over India
she gained her ancestral memories but is possesed by Abomination and keeps trying to claim sovereignty over India
it's "fuck a freak friday"
i wish you all well, but I'm nornal, so will be sitting this one out.
happy hunting!
i wish you all well, but I'm nornal, so will be sitting this one out.
happy hunting!
March 8, 2024 at 2:15 PM
it's "fuck a freak friday"
i wish you all well, but I'm nornal, so will be sitting this one out.
happy hunting!
i wish you all well, but I'm nornal, so will be sitting this one out.
happy hunting!
learned about two things this morning at the same time
March 8, 2024 at 10:29 AM
learned about two things this morning at the same time