New Year’s Weaz 🎉
@spiceweasel.bsky.social
On a never-ending quest to bring back short basketball shorts, soft-launching this as a Philly sports account
& Titus Forever
& Titus Forever
Pinned
My mom has been cleaning stuff up at my parents’ house & found a letter where young me made some very good points about not wanting to sing in church
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Hoagie paper 🤣😂🤣🤣
January 7, 2026 at 2:18 AM
Hoagie paper 🤣😂🤣🤣
Just thinking about the nurse at the clinic where I finally got bep the Covid vax on a wink and a nod, she was a pediatric nurse at CHOP & clearly had seen some shit. She looked me dead in the eyes and said “keep doing whatever you have to do to keep him up to date on vaccines”
BREAKING: The U.S. drops the number of vaccines it recommends for every child in an unprecedented overhaul of childhood health protections.
US drops the number of vaccines it recommends for every child
The U.S. took the unprecedented step Monday of dropping the number of vaccines it recommends for every child — leaving other immunizations, such as flu shots, open to families to choose but without clear guidance.
bit.ly
January 7, 2026 at 12:37 PM
Just thinking about the nurse at the clinic where I finally got bep the Covid vax on a wink and a nod, she was a pediatric nurse at CHOP & clearly had seen some shit. She looked me dead in the eyes and said “keep doing whatever you have to do to keep him up to date on vaccines”
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Frank Drebin Jr fighting for his life after eating chili dog and then immediately eating another chili dog is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in awhile
January 5, 2026 at 2:20 AM
Frank Drebin Jr fighting for his life after eating chili dog and then immediately eating another chili dog is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in awhile
James has an umbrella called the Shedrain Vortex and anytime it rains I’m like “do you have your ✨Shedrain Vortex?✨ don’t forget your ✨Shedrain Vortex✨!!!” and boy does he get agitated when I do this but like, don’t have such a weirdly named umbrella imo
January 6, 2026 at 10:48 PM
James has an umbrella called the Shedrain Vortex and anytime it rains I’m like “do you have your ✨Shedrain Vortex?✨ don’t forget your ✨Shedrain Vortex✨!!!” and boy does he get agitated when I do this but like, don’t have such a weirdly named umbrella imo
Now is that the guy or the cheese?
January 6, 2026 at 9:38 PM
Now is that the guy or the cheese?
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“average Brazilian goes to the hospital three times a year" factoid actually just statistical error. Average Brazilian goes to hospital 0 times per year. Hiccuping Jair, who lives in cave & goes to hospital 10,000 times each day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.
January 6, 2026 at 7:56 PM
“average Brazilian goes to the hospital three times a year" factoid actually just statistical error. Average Brazilian goes to hospital 0 times per year. Hiccuping Jair, who lives in cave & goes to hospital 10,000 times each day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.
Can I say something without everyone getting mad at me? I worked from home for almost a full day today, this is not what they call “radical mental rest”
January 6, 2026 at 9:29 PM
Can I say something without everyone getting mad at me? I worked from home for almost a full day today, this is not what they call “radical mental rest”
Sometimes he does what he calls “Strong Oval” where he makes his arms into an oval shape and grunts loudly, basically he is already a (very small) professional wrestler
Tbh biggest shock of 2026 so far if he strays from his favorite shape, the oval
January 6, 2026 at 6:42 PM
Sometimes he does what he calls “Strong Oval” where he makes his arms into an oval shape and grunts loudly, basically he is already a (very small) professional wrestler
Reposted by New Year’s Weaz 🎉
Reposted by New Year’s Weaz 🎉
Me, doing the newsletter: ah, an investment committee meeting, wanna join the investment committee?
Bep: YES
Me: what are you going to invest in
Bep: ... the circle
Me: excellent
Bep: YES
Me: what are you going to invest in
Bep: ... the circle
Me: excellent
January 6, 2026 at 5:29 PM
Me, doing the newsletter: ah, an investment committee meeting, wanna join the investment committee?
Bep: YES
Me: what are you going to invest in
Bep: ... the circle
Me: excellent
Bep: YES
Me: what are you going to invest in
Bep: ... the circle
Me: excellent
Reposted by New Year’s Weaz 🎉
Join us this Thursday for the inaugural installment of Chris's TV Party!
January 6, 2026 at 4:26 PM
Join us this Thursday for the inaugural installment of Chris's TV Party!
Things I keep randomly huffing to check and see how my sense of smell is doing:
-Peppermint oil (can smell)
-Citrus oil (can smell)
-Cinnamon (can smell)
-Different scented candles (pine, cedar, & apple, can smell)
-Kimchi (can't smell?!)
-My son's head (can't smell 😭)
My sense of taste is gone
-Peppermint oil (can smell)
-Citrus oil (can smell)
-Cinnamon (can smell)
-Different scented candles (pine, cedar, & apple, can smell)
-Kimchi (can't smell?!)
-My son's head (can't smell 😭)
My sense of taste is gone
January 6, 2026 at 4:27 PM
Things I keep randomly huffing to check and see how my sense of smell is doing:
-Peppermint oil (can smell)
-Citrus oil (can smell)
-Cinnamon (can smell)
-Different scented candles (pine, cedar, & apple, can smell)
-Kimchi (can't smell?!)
-My son's head (can't smell 😭)
My sense of taste is gone
-Peppermint oil (can smell)
-Citrus oil (can smell)
-Cinnamon (can smell)
-Different scented candles (pine, cedar, & apple, can smell)
-Kimchi (can't smell?!)
-My son's head (can't smell 😭)
My sense of taste is gone
Today is definitely the day I have to make sure I don't overdo it
Still sick as hell but still getting a little better each day
January 6, 2026 at 4:11 PM
Today is definitely the day I have to make sure I don't overdo it
Reposted by New Year’s Weaz 🎉
just scrolled past six different screenshots of tweets pointing out how bad those tweets are. please stop asking me to smell the spoiled milk.
January 6, 2026 at 3:20 PM
just scrolled past six different screenshots of tweets pointing out how bad those tweets are. please stop asking me to smell the spoiled milk.
my mom has covid now "lol"
January 6, 2026 at 2:56 PM
my mom has covid now "lol"
Reposted by New Year’s Weaz 🎉
i'm working from home today and i'm like "thank high school jesus i just have the newsletter this week" but actually high school jesus said "i want to challenge you, my child" because i have EIGHTEEN submissions for the newsletter, usually i have, like, five
January 6, 2026 at 1:58 PM
i'm working from home today and i'm like "thank high school jesus i just have the newsletter this week" but actually high school jesus said "i want to challenge you, my child" because i have EIGHTEEN submissions for the newsletter, usually i have, like, five
Still sick as hell but still getting a little better each day
January 6, 2026 at 1:18 PM
Still sick as hell but still getting a little better each day
I know I posted this in a joking tone but my god two nights ago I was in so much pain and so feverish I could barely move
Who unleashed an army of stabbing gnomes inside my body
January 6, 2026 at 2:38 AM
I know I posted this in a joking tone but my god two nights ago I was in so much pain and so feverish I could barely move
Why does being sick absolutely destroy your lips?! I’ve had at least 80oz of water today and they’re still flakier than a dang day old croissant
January 6, 2026 at 1:23 AM
Why does being sick absolutely destroy your lips?! I’ve had at least 80oz of water today and they’re still flakier than a dang day old croissant
You guys should hear my voice right now it is SO wrecked
January 5, 2026 at 10:33 PM
You guys should hear my voice right now it is SO wrecked
Bep, grabbing a tissue: I’m gonna blow a tissue with my nose
Me: ok go ahead
Bep: *tiniest nose blow I’ve ever seen*
Me: ok go ahead
Bep: *tiniest nose blow I’ve ever seen*
January 5, 2026 at 8:14 PM
Bep, grabbing a tissue: I’m gonna blow a tissue with my nose
Me: ok go ahead
Bep: *tiniest nose blow I’ve ever seen*
Me: ok go ahead
Bep: *tiniest nose blow I’ve ever seen*
New season of The Pitt goes crazy
Downtown. 242 Fifth Ave - CVS. Caller said someone just stole like 7 full cases of Dr. Pepper and fled. Suspect is currently walking down Fifth with a comical amount of Dr. Pepper.
January 5, 2026 at 8:10 PM
New season of The Pitt goes crazy
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I do not need Copilot because I am not flying an airplane. I need Microsoft Office for my office job that I do in an office
January 5, 2026 at 6:55 PM
I do not need Copilot because I am not flying an airplane. I need Microsoft Office for my office job that I do in an office