Pants Shaton
@pantsshaton.bsky.social
PHM. Invented the term PHM.
Official biggest fud on Hearts Twitter
De facto biggest fud on Hearts BlueSky
Dislike Hibs and fascists. Especially Hibs fascists.
Official biggest fud on Hearts Twitter
De facto biggest fud on Hearts BlueSky
Dislike Hibs and fascists. Especially Hibs fascists.
Fouls per yellow card:
Hearts 5.9
Rangers 6.2
Celtic 7.1
You have to laugh at their establishment conspiracy pish.
From the most establishment, Tory club in British Football. Hope Sir Rod is spewing into his Reform manifesto
Hearts 5.9
Rangers 6.2
Celtic 7.1
You have to laugh at their establishment conspiracy pish.
From the most establishment, Tory club in British Football. Hope Sir Rod is spewing into his Reform manifesto
January 26, 2026 at 11:49 AM
Fouls per yellow card:
Hearts 5.9
Rangers 6.2
Celtic 7.1
You have to laugh at their establishment conspiracy pish.
From the most establishment, Tory club in British Football. Hope Sir Rod is spewing into his Reform manifesto
Hearts 5.9
Rangers 6.2
Celtic 7.1
You have to laugh at their establishment conspiracy pish.
From the most establishment, Tory club in British Football. Hope Sir Rod is spewing into his Reform manifesto
I hope he finds the help he needs.
January 26, 2026 at 7:27 AM
I hope he finds the help he needs.
Did some Celtic fans steal Joel and Craig’s camera? Where’s the @heartsstandard.bsky.social reaction video?
January 25, 2026 at 8:25 PM
Did some Celtic fans steal Joel and Craig’s camera? Where’s the @heartsstandard.bsky.social reaction video?
My experience on here is being in an entirely Hearts bubble - unlike on Twitter where oddball opposition fans frequently popped up.
Seeing that nonce Celtic fan getting in amongst the Hearts posts here and I have to say, I don’t miss it.
Seeing that nonce Celtic fan getting in amongst the Hearts posts here and I have to say, I don’t miss it.
January 25, 2026 at 8:17 PM
My experience on here is being in an entirely Hearts bubble - unlike on Twitter where oddball opposition fans frequently popped up.
Seeing that nonce Celtic fan getting in amongst the Hearts posts here and I have to say, I don’t miss it.
Seeing that nonce Celtic fan getting in amongst the Hearts posts here and I have to say, I don’t miss it.
Me: I wonder if Rangers have a tough game next weekend?
[checks fixtures]
[checks fixtures]
a man in a suit and tie is sitting in front of a window
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting in front of a window
media.tenor.com
January 25, 2026 at 8:14 PM
Me: I wonder if Rangers have a tough game next weekend?
[checks fixtures]
[checks fixtures]
Some fat arsehole tried to squeeze through the turnstile with me today and then kept trying it with a bunch of other people. Think he was Celtic. Clueless steward was fucking useless.
There must be dozens of fuckers getting through like this
There must be dozens of fuckers getting through like this
January 25, 2026 at 6:40 PM
Some fat arsehole tried to squeeze through the turnstile with me today and then kept trying it with a bunch of other people. Think he was Celtic. Clueless steward was fucking useless.
There must be dozens of fuckers getting through like this
There must be dozens of fuckers getting through like this
I’m going to repost my own post until Disco John gets the recognition he deserves.
He deserves a chance at a big club and Aberdeen is exactly the stepping stone he needs to achieve that
He deserves a chance at a big club and Aberdeen is exactly the stepping stone he needs to achieve that
January 25, 2026 at 6:34 PM
I’m going to repost my own post until Disco John gets the recognition he deserves.
He deserves a chance at a big club and Aberdeen is exactly the stepping stone he needs to achieve that
He deserves a chance at a big club and Aberdeen is exactly the stepping stone he needs to achieve that
Martin O’Neill might think that’s not a red but, to be fair to the referee, the last time Martin updated himself on the laws of the game, they were written on parchment
January 25, 2026 at 5:41 PM
Martin O’Neill might think that’s not a red but, to be fair to the referee, the last time Martin updated himself on the laws of the game, they were written on parchment
Hearts the better side
Missed opportunity in a way
Missed opportunity in a way
January 25, 2026 at 5:07 PM
Hearts the better side
Missed opportunity in a way
Missed opportunity in a way
If we were looking for clear indications that the Old Firm are running scared, just look at Celtic’s ticket sales for today’s game.
Barely over 600.
In the past they’d shift far more than that.
A club in visible decline.
Barely over 600.
In the past they’d shift far more than that.
A club in visible decline.
January 25, 2026 at 1:16 PM
If we were looking for clear indications that the Old Firm are running scared, just look at Celtic’s ticket sales for today’s game.
Barely over 600.
In the past they’d shift far more than that.
A club in visible decline.
Barely over 600.
In the past they’d shift far more than that.
A club in visible decline.
Nothing can stop this colossus of a man
January 25, 2026 at 12:35 PM
Nothing can stop this colossus of a man
This can’t be a real thing.
Fair play to Google Maps - who lost a lot of credibility with their ‘Gulf of America’ pish
Fair play to Google Maps - who lost a lot of credibility with their ‘Gulf of America’ pish
January 25, 2026 at 12:10 AM
This can’t be a real thing.
Fair play to Google Maps - who lost a lot of credibility with their ‘Gulf of America’ pish
Fair play to Google Maps - who lost a lot of credibility with their ‘Gulf of America’ pish
That risible performance at Easter Road is all the more shameful when you consider how utterly shite Hibernian FC are
January 24, 2026 at 4:54 PM
That risible performance at Easter Road is all the more shameful when you consider how utterly shite Hibernian FC are
Tragic how Pat’s love of driving would later take such a dark turn
January 24, 2026 at 10:38 AM
Tragic how Pat’s love of driving would later take such a dark turn
Swinney ‘considering’ capping what we can charge away fans at £25
Ha ha ha
Fuck off and do your real job man
Ha ha ha
Fuck off and do your real job man
January 23, 2026 at 4:29 PM
Swinney ‘considering’ capping what we can charge away fans at £25
Ha ha ha
Fuck off and do your real job man
Ha ha ha
Fuck off and do your real job man
What an embarrassing weirdo
Shameful stuff from HMFC
Shameful stuff from HMFC
January 23, 2026 at 2:26 PM
What an embarrassing weirdo
Shameful stuff from HMFC
Shameful stuff from HMFC
Reposted by Pants Shaton
You're watching BBC Scotland.
January 23, 2026 at 11:26 AM
You're watching BBC Scotland.
We should almost feel guilty about this.
It’s a form of cruelty
It’s a form of cruelty
Nicked off FB but there it is, the most one-sided derby in the UK.
January 23, 2026 at 1:34 PM
We should almost feel guilty about this.
It’s a form of cruelty
It’s a form of cruelty
Fuck knows how likely it is - presumably not at all
But it would be fucking superb if we pulled a signing out of the bag that absolutely amazed us all. Another one of those big statements we love to make.
But it would be fucking superb if we pulled a signing out of the bag that absolutely amazed us all. Another one of those big statements we love to make.
January 23, 2026 at 9:38 AM
Fuck knows how likely it is - presumably not at all
But it would be fucking superb if we pulled a signing out of the bag that absolutely amazed us all. Another one of those big statements we love to make.
But it would be fucking superb if we pulled a signing out of the bag that absolutely amazed us all. Another one of those big statements we love to make.
It would be great if we could convince a fading Premier League megastar to join us for half a season to wrap up the league title.
I think we all remember how different class Ian Wright and Roy Keane were when they joined our farmers’ league.
I think we all remember how different class Ian Wright and Roy Keane were when they joined our farmers’ league.
January 22, 2026 at 8:55 PM
It would be great if we could convince a fading Premier League megastar to join us for half a season to wrap up the league title.
I think we all remember how different class Ian Wright and Roy Keane were when they joined our farmers’ league.
I think we all remember how different class Ian Wright and Roy Keane were when they joined our farmers’ league.
Shite Kraftwerk tribute band
January 22, 2026 at 8:13 PM
Shite Kraftwerk tribute band
“My doctors tell me ‘No one’s done palliative care more bigly than this’, the most beautiful palliative care, so beautiful. No one has been more not for recusitationed than me. Ree-SUS-a-tay-shon such a great word. No one said it before me. The ballroom will have solid gold tiles.”
January 22, 2026 at 7:41 PM
“My doctors tell me ‘No one’s done palliative care more bigly than this’, the most beautiful palliative care, so beautiful. No one has been more not for recusitationed than me. Ree-SUS-a-tay-shon such a great word. No one said it before me. The ballroom will have solid gold tiles.”