When I learned what calculators did, I immediately cleared the "math" part of my brain to make room for more movie quotes.

Some of the thoughts I post here are so old, Jake Paul wants to fight them next summer.

Just dropped my toothpaste in the toilet. Crestfallen.

If two people are arguing and one person says, "You know what..." that argument is about to get awesome.

Are you tired of greasy pots and pans? Stubborn kitchen stains? Messy sponges and sprays? Me too. I wish the sun would devour the earth.

Lucy in the sky with some esplainin' to do.

I've given this a lot of thought and done all of the necessary research, and please believe me when I tell you, "I have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about."

I don't believe in Big Foot, because he never believed in me. I remember looking out into the audience at my ballet recitals and always seeing that one empty seat.