Michael Burns
@michaelburns.bsky.social
person that makes philosophic and comedic content, deadhead, lake guy.
https://www.youtube.com/@MichaelOBurns
https://www.youtube.com/@MichaelOBurns
The strongest alphas in the world are terrified to death of a woman going 3mph in an SVU that has stuffed animals in it.
January 8, 2026 at 9:28 PM
The strongest alphas in the world are terrified to death of a woman going 3mph in an SVU that has stuffed animals in it.
Every day I think about the fact that a nine hour Prince documentary exists and we’ll never get to see it.
January 8, 2026 at 6:23 AM
Every day I think about the fact that a nine hour Prince documentary exists and we’ll never get to see it.
Reposted by Michael Burns
i think it is ok to reiterate that the victim as a us citizen. yes, noncitizens are equally entitled to human rights. but also, it's important to illustrate how ice isn't about immigration at all
January 8, 2026 at 1:41 AM
i think it is ok to reiterate that the victim as a us citizen. yes, noncitizens are equally entitled to human rights. but also, it's important to illustrate how ice isn't about immigration at all
fyi no stream today.
i am in the woods.
back next week.
can't wait.
i am in the woods.
back next week.
can't wait.
January 7, 2026 at 8:22 PM
fyi no stream today.
i am in the woods.
back next week.
can't wait.
i am in the woods.
back next week.
can't wait.
i dunno maybe ICE agents are the biggest fascist pussies on the entire planet??? and they mask their cowardice and incompetence behind force and senseless violence??? and none of this is about immigration but about paying idiots too dumb to be cops to wear masks and point guns??? i dunno.
January 7, 2026 at 7:59 PM
i dunno maybe ICE agents are the biggest fascist pussies on the entire planet??? and they mask their cowardice and incompetence behind force and senseless violence??? and none of this is about immigration but about paying idiots too dumb to be cops to wear masks and point guns??? i dunno.
It sucks that Jesus never got to experience drinking 3 beers and then online shopping for things he didn’t need.
January 6, 2026 at 3:24 AM
It sucks that Jesus never got to experience drinking 3 beers and then online shopping for things he didn’t need.
If you have student loan debt you gotta spend your money on guitars because the government can’t garnish a guitar from you.
This is professional financial advice.
This is professional financial advice.
January 5, 2026 at 3:20 AM
If you have student loan debt you gotta spend your money on guitars because the government can’t garnish a guitar from you.
This is professional financial advice.
This is professional financial advice.
pavement x mj lenderman co-headlining tour would be a cool thing that could make life worth living for a bit longer.
January 4, 2026 at 11:04 PM
pavement x mj lenderman co-headlining tour would be a cool thing that could make life worth living for a bit longer.
does anyone know (or have experience with) setting up an internship program that enables participants to get college credit and stuff?
January 4, 2026 at 6:06 PM
does anyone know (or have experience with) setting up an internship program that enables participants to get college credit and stuff?
Capitalism's New Playbook EXPOSED
YouTube video by Michael Burns
youtu.be
January 4, 2026 at 5:49 PM
do they still make kids do the pledge and the national anthem at school?
January 3, 2026 at 8:50 PM
do they still make kids do the pledge and the national anthem at school?
Reposted by Michael Burns
This is not a paid advertisement. Subscribe at membership.theonion.com to receive the newspaper and see more print-exclusive content.
January 3, 2026 at 8:46 PM
This is not a paid advertisement. Subscribe at membership.theonion.com to receive the newspaper and see more print-exclusive content.
Can some country do what we did to Maduro to Trump?
Denmark, you trying to fuck around?
Ireland, wanna do something weird?
Peru, wanna invade Palm Beach?
Denmark, you trying to fuck around?
Ireland, wanna do something weird?
Peru, wanna invade Palm Beach?
January 3, 2026 at 8:02 PM
Can some country do what we did to Maduro to Trump?
Denmark, you trying to fuck around?
Ireland, wanna do something weird?
Peru, wanna invade Palm Beach?
Denmark, you trying to fuck around?
Ireland, wanna do something weird?
Peru, wanna invade Palm Beach?
Reposted by Michael Burns
"In the florescent death of the American empire, we are concerned about how it reflects on our brand to be associated with a channel that acknowledges material conditions and advocates for the emancipation of the human soul."
January 3, 2026 at 5:56 PM
"In the florescent death of the American empire, we are concerned about how it reflects on our brand to be associated with a channel that acknowledges material conditions and advocates for the emancipation of the human soul."
Reposted by Michael Burns
Lost a pretty big sponsor deal today over “brand safety concerns” so great day to join my Patreon if you want to support what we’re doing.
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
Michael Burns | Patreon
using philosophy to make sense of a non-sense world
www.patreon.com
January 2, 2026 at 6:53 PM
Lost a pretty big sponsor deal today over “brand safety concerns” so great day to join my Patreon if you want to support what we’re doing.
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
Lost a pretty big sponsor deal today over “brand safety concerns” so great day to join my Patreon if you want to support what we’re doing.
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
Michael Burns | Patreon
using philosophy to make sense of a non-sense world
www.patreon.com
January 2, 2026 at 6:53 PM
Lost a pretty big sponsor deal today over “brand safety concerns” so great day to join my Patreon if you want to support what we’re doing.
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
You can jump in for as little as $2 a month.
www.patreon.com/MichaelBurns...
me? supposed to film video the night before I leave for my first vacation in a long time? instead having to figure out how to finish a script (with help) during a 7 hour drive? and then filming on a mobile setup when i get there? praying the wifi is strong enough to upload 4k footage?
can't be me.
can't be me.
January 2, 2026 at 7:11 AM
me? supposed to film video the night before I leave for my first vacation in a long time? instead having to figure out how to finish a script (with help) during a 7 hour drive? and then filming on a mobile setup when i get there? praying the wifi is strong enough to upload 4k footage?
can't be me.
can't be me.
Reposted by Michael Burns
Computer is not a people.
we must, and i cannot overstate this enough
shoot computer
shoot computer
Grok can't apologize. Grok can, when prompted, generate a word sequence that is statistically similar to the colloquial phrases we think of as "apologies," but Grok cannot actually apologize because Grok isn't sentient. But we all have a lot of trouble with this because we assume sentience IS speech
January 2, 2026 at 6:36 AM
Computer is not a people.
Reposted by Michael Burns
DEATH STRANDING 2 x HEATED RIVALRY NOW LIVE
NEW YEAR NEW FORMAT
DISCORD MEMBERS HOP IN THE THEATER NOW
twitch.tv/technopoverty
NEW YEAR NEW FORMAT
DISCORD MEMBERS HOP IN THE THEATER NOW
twitch.tv/technopoverty
TechnoPoverty - Twitch
An inter-dimensional stream bringing together books and video-games, every Monday and Thursday @ 7:30pm cst, Shin Megami Tuesdays @3pm cst.Older episodes on our YouTube channel.
twitch.tv
January 2, 2026 at 1:42 AM
DEATH STRANDING 2 x HEATED RIVALRY NOW LIVE
NEW YEAR NEW FORMAT
DISCORD MEMBERS HOP IN THE THEATER NOW
twitch.tv/technopoverty
NEW YEAR NEW FORMAT
DISCORD MEMBERS HOP IN THE THEATER NOW
twitch.tv/technopoverty
watching Zohran's swearing in makes me feel like we can take this momentum across the country.
in LA, we have the chance to elect a democratic socialist mayor in 2026.
let's do it.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb_3...
in LA, we have the chance to elect a democratic socialist mayor in 2026.
let's do it.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb_3...
From Christian Pastor to Socialist Mayoral Candidate
YouTube video by Side Burns
www.youtube.com
January 1, 2026 at 8:11 PM
watching Zohran's swearing in makes me feel like we can take this momentum across the country.
in LA, we have the chance to elect a democratic socialist mayor in 2026.
let's do it.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb_3...
in LA, we have the chance to elect a democratic socialist mayor in 2026.
let's do it.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb_3...
doing some "math" today, and over 60% of my channel revenue in 2025 came from my patreon community.
so thank you to all of those folks as you've made it possible for me, and a team of amazing contributors, to put content into the world that we believe in and are making earnestly and honestly.
so thank you to all of those folks as you've made it possible for me, and a team of amazing contributors, to put content into the world that we believe in and are making earnestly and honestly.
January 1, 2026 at 7:58 PM
doing some "math" today, and over 60% of my channel revenue in 2025 came from my patreon community.
so thank you to all of those folks as you've made it possible for me, and a team of amazing contributors, to put content into the world that we believe in and are making earnestly and honestly.
so thank you to all of those folks as you've made it possible for me, and a team of amazing contributors, to put content into the world that we believe in and are making earnestly and honestly.
i love that Bernie just has the one nice winter coat he wears at every outdoor event
January 1, 2026 at 7:36 PM
i love that Bernie just has the one nice winter coat he wears at every outdoor event
can't wait to one day read the wikipedia for Stranger Things and know what the show was about.
January 1, 2026 at 7:18 PM
can't wait to one day read the wikipedia for Stranger Things and know what the show was about.
If you're bored/hungover today, check out my report on how I started my channel this year, how it's going, and what the future holds.
I also have a poll and an ask for feedback.
Been very humbling/cool to see that most folks don't want "more stuff" for me, just to support the work we're doing.
I also have a poll and an ask for feedback.
Been very humbling/cool to see that most folks don't want "more stuff" for me, just to support the work we're doing.
2025 channel report and 2026 plans and goals is now on Patreon for anyone who wants to see it.
www.patreon.com/posts/2025-c...
www.patreon.com/posts/2025-c...
2025 Channel Report + Update | Michael Burns
Get more from Michael Burns on Patreon
www.patreon.com
January 1, 2026 at 6:59 PM
If you're bored/hungover today, check out my report on how I started my channel this year, how it's going, and what the future holds.
I also have a poll and an ask for feedback.
Been very humbling/cool to see that most folks don't want "more stuff" for me, just to support the work we're doing.
I also have a poll and an ask for feedback.
Been very humbling/cool to see that most folks don't want "more stuff" for me, just to support the work we're doing.