MELLY
@mellyfratelli.bsky.social
“looming over a spreadsheet like Nosferatu conducting an audit”
Letterboxd: https://boxd.it/ONe3
Films. Football. Fun.
📌 Durham
Letterboxd: https://boxd.it/ONe3
Films. Football. Fun.
📌 Durham
Pinned
I think last summer put paid to that idea tbh. We knew about Longstaff, DCL, Okafor and Justin before those signings happened.
January 7, 2026 at 12:27 PM
I think last summer put paid to that idea tbh. We knew about Longstaff, DCL, Okafor and Justin before those signings happened.
I’m not one for getting my hopes up, but for a split second, him atop that seahorse had my mind’s eye seeing FT Newcastle 0 1 Leeds (Stach 91’). I went against everything I believe.
January 7, 2026 at 12:24 PM
I’m not one for getting my hopes up, but for a split second, him atop that seahorse had my mind’s eye seeing FT Newcastle 0 1 Leeds (Stach 91’). I went against everything I believe.
The door is about to fall off my air fryer. Which is sad, but it means I get to do something gloriously middle-aged and exciting: GO SHOPPING FOR A NEW AIR FRYER!
January 7, 2026 at 12:15 PM
The door is about to fall off my air fryer. Which is sad, but it means I get to do something gloriously middle-aged and exciting: GO SHOPPING FOR A NEW AIR FRYER!
Yep, all of those brands taste like doughy chemicals.
January 7, 2026 at 12:01 PM
Yep, all of those brands taste like doughy chemicals.
I always felt safer in London than I do in Durham. My friend just went back to London after a whole month up here for Christmas and this came up in the group chat just two days ago. People who think London is dangerous don’t seem to spend/much any time there.
January 7, 2026 at 11:53 AM
I always felt safer in London than I do in Durham. My friend just went back to London after a whole month up here for Christmas and this came up in the group chat just two days ago. People who think London is dangerous don’t seem to spend/much any time there.
I am a fairly average human so I feel comfortable assuming that most women in public toilets lock the cubicle door, have a quick wee, wash their hands, check they’ve got all of their stuff and then leave. Apparently some recline there, waiting to be assaulted by boogeywomen. Sure!!
January 7, 2026 at 11:50 AM
I am a fairly average human so I feel comfortable assuming that most women in public toilets lock the cubicle door, have a quick wee, wash their hands, check they’ve got all of their stuff and then leave. Apparently some recline there, waiting to be assaulted by boogeywomen. Sure!!
I hope that if someone murders ME, it’s in the most humane way possible 🥰
January 7, 2026 at 11:45 AM
I hope that if someone murders ME, it’s in the most humane way possible 🥰
I’d personally love to hear David Batty called Joey Barton a little twat to his face.
January 7, 2026 at 10:26 AM
I’d personally love to hear David Batty called Joey Barton a little twat to his face.
Article does not mention that some ninja at Leeds United got a lockdown round of applause out of Batts, AND a Euros “good luck” message for Kalvin Phillips - with added gorgeous pupper cameo! That’s the face of a man enjoying a glorious & relaxing retirement.
January 7, 2026 at 10:25 AM
Article does not mention that some ninja at Leeds United got a lockdown round of applause out of Batts, AND a Euros “good luck” message for Kalvin Phillips - with added gorgeous pupper cameo! That’s the face of a man enjoying a glorious & relaxing retirement.
Pin it to your profile.
January 7, 2026 at 10:16 AM
Pin it to your profile.
Reposted by MELLY
Worst thing about supporting Leeds is Leeds fans
January 7, 2026 at 10:15 AM
Worst thing about supporting Leeds is Leeds fans
There’s a million reasons why this wouldn’t be true and only two reasons why it would. Although those two reasons (Premier League + the selling club needing money) are fairly compelling.
January 7, 2026 at 10:07 AM
There’s a million reasons why this wouldn’t be true and only two reasons why it would. Although those two reasons (Premier League + the selling club needing money) are fairly compelling.
Random David Batty article on BBC Spot today. #LUFC
TRIGGER WARNING: Duckface is the Leeds WhatsApp.
www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
TRIGGER WARNING: Duckface is the Leeds WhatsApp.
www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
Newcastle v Leeds: What happened to David Batty?
England midfielder David Batty vowed to have
www.bbc.co.uk
January 7, 2026 at 10:06 AM
Random David Batty article on BBC Spot today. #LUFC
TRIGGER WARNING: Duckface is the Leeds WhatsApp.
www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
TRIGGER WARNING: Duckface is the Leeds WhatsApp.
www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
Depends if that’s always going to be the strategy or if they adapt. Young and expensive is a pretty standard policy elsewhere. If anyone else gets Fermin for £70, it’s a great signing.
Reminding you that I’ve never believed it’s happening and my intrigue was only ever about the gossip element.
Reminding you that I’ve never believed it’s happening and my intrigue was only ever about the gossip element.
January 7, 2026 at 10:03 AM
Depends if that’s always going to be the strategy or if they adapt. Young and expensive is a pretty standard policy elsewhere. If anyone else gets Fermin for £70, it’s a great signing.
Reminding you that I’ve never believed it’s happening and my intrigue was only ever about the gossip element.
Reminding you that I’ve never believed it’s happening and my intrigue was only ever about the gossip element.
I hate it so much! Mainly as an online thing but I roll my eyes when I hear it at games, too. Unnecessarily bothers me.
January 7, 2026 at 10:01 AM
I hate it so much! Mainly as an online thing but I roll my eyes when I hear it at games, too. Unnecessarily bothers me.
I’ve got ALAW muted. How did you slip through the net? Bluesky in the mud.
January 7, 2026 at 9:45 AM
I’ve got ALAW muted. How did you slip through the net? Bluesky in the mud.
I’m no expert on their finances, I just know they aren’t run badly. But let’s circle back here because I think we’re running into “£70m is a lot of money” territory. In this Premier Super League, it’s really not.
January 7, 2026 at 9:43 AM
I’m no expert on their finances, I just know they aren’t run badly. But let’s circle back here because I think we’re running into “£70m is a lot of money” territory. In this Premier Super League, it’s really not.
Home end, no steps for me.
January 7, 2026 at 9:40 AM
Home end, no steps for me.
Lose 2-zip, shake hands, get home for a good kip.
January 7, 2026 at 9:34 AM
Lose 2-zip, shake hands, get home for a good kip.
Speaking of Bournemouth, would love them to get a dent in their goal difference tonight. Shame Spurs can’t be relied on for anything.
January 7, 2026 at 9:33 AM
Speaking of Bournemouth, would love them to get a dent in their goal difference tonight. Shame Spurs can’t be relied on for anything.
You could eat shite all day and not realise how much vegan-friendly stuff you’re eating. Beans on toast, Oreos, jammy dodgers - sensational.
January 7, 2026 at 9:31 AM
You could eat shite all day and not realise how much vegan-friendly stuff you’re eating. Beans on toast, Oreos, jammy dodgers - sensational.
Sounds like they’ve got £70m to spend though. They’re not a reckless club.
Fermin’s release clause being 7 times more than that being the obvious fly in the ointment, however.
Fermin’s release clause being 7 times more than that being the obvious fly in the ointment, however.
January 7, 2026 at 9:30 AM
Sounds like they’ve got £70m to spend though. They’re not a reckless club.
Fermin’s release clause being 7 times more than that being the obvious fly in the ointment, however.
Fermin’s release clause being 7 times more than that being the obvious fly in the ointment, however.
Oh NO! Falling over is my big fear because I can and do stack it on dry, flat surfaces on a regular basis. Please just take the bus. Thank you!
January 7, 2026 at 9:27 AM
Oh NO! Falling over is my big fear because I can and do stack it on dry, flat surfaces on a regular basis. Please just take the bus. Thank you!
These people are hilarious because they think the words “juicy steak” will make you cry. Their reaction when I’d say stuff like “I’m flattered you care so much what I eat because I literally do not care what *you* eat” was always so much more emotional.
January 7, 2026 at 9:26 AM
These people are hilarious because they think the words “juicy steak” will make you cry. Their reaction when I’d say stuff like “I’m flattered you care so much what I eat because I literally do not care what *you* eat” was always so much more emotional.
“Hold my beer” is one of the worst things to happen to the online continent of fans.
January 7, 2026 at 9:24 AM
“Hold my beer” is one of the worst things to happen to the online continent of fans.