Matty
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mattyhayward.com
Matty
@mattyhayward.com
Ph.D — Natural Hazards 🌋⚒️
That lil dork
London 🏳️‍🌈
Wew the tremors from this weekend still rolling through me 🫨
November 17, 2025 at 9:59 AM
One bleak day 🌧️💨
November 14, 2025 at 11:14 AM
Announce the month, traitors 👿
November 6, 2025 at 11:04 PM
hello city cat 🥹
November 6, 2025 at 12:15 PM
Wow what a surprise November is also exhausting 🥲
November 5, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Why are McDonald’s fries in London basically raw?
November 3, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Patience
November 2, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Someone overtly whistling ‘Deck the Halls’ in Tesco while standing next to pumpkins…

… cursed.
October 29, 2025 at 12:44 PM
October is TIRING

WHY is being spooky so energy sapping
October 21, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Good morning 🥱😮‍💨
October 12, 2025 at 8:38 AM
Today, in my thirties, I finally learned how to swallow a tablet
September 30, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Me when someone in the southern hemisphere posts about longer days and later sunsets:
September 28, 2025 at 2:57 PM
One day Citymapper will fix their “try to move the map and instantly moves 100 miles away” bug
September 27, 2025 at 1:12 PM
Finally out of jury service jail 🥹
September 24, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Incredible disdain for the word ‘pudding’
September 1, 2025 at 11:52 PM
Let’s see you at 21
August 29, 2025 at 12:18 PM
☀️ sun days
August 25, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Mind is *melting* 🫠
August 24, 2025 at 12:27 AM
My favourite 🙂‍↕️🍃
August 20, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Dragging me to the one thing I’ll sing along too
August 19, 2025 at 9:23 PM
➡️ to Birmingham~
August 13, 2025 at 10:20 AM
Running around a football field for the first time in forever 🫨😮‍💨
August 10, 2025 at 1:19 PM
Wew my crowds of people are way too jumbled 🥴
August 10, 2025 at 12:48 AM
Friday evenings are a high tease when you have to be up and out by 6am on a Saturday 🫨
August 1, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Snip ✂️
August 1, 2025 at 11:31 AM