Mari Cohn
@maricohn.bsky.social
Your least favorite drag queen’s least favorite drag queen
Writer by day
📍San Francisco 🌁
Argentinean 🇦🇷
Eat the rich 🌹
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
Be gay, do crime
Writer by day
📍San Francisco 🌁
Argentinean 🇦🇷
Eat the rich 🌹
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
Be gay, do crime
Pinned
Mari Cohn
@maricohn.bsky.social
· Sep 9
Things said at my D&D table with no context, a thread:
*bonk* “Why is there a newt in a forcecage!?”
*bonk* “Why is there a newt in a forcecage!?”
I finished Game Changer yesterday and cried and squealed and laughed on every page. I love my sweet baby angels Scott and Kip so so much. I need so much more of them in my life.
February 13, 2026 at 5:20 AM
I finished Game Changer yesterday and cried and squealed and laughed on every page. I love my sweet baby angels Scott and Kip so so much. I need so much more of them in my life.
“Oh but what if your favorite celebrity is in the Epstein files?”
Then kill them.
If my favorite celebrity did that to children, take them to the town square, tie a rope to each of their limbs, and have horses pull their body apart.
Kill. Them.
Then kill them.
If my favorite celebrity did that to children, take them to the town square, tie a rope to each of their limbs, and have horses pull their body apart.
Kill. Them.
February 13, 2026 at 1:16 AM
“Oh but what if your favorite celebrity is in the Epstein files?”
Then kill them.
If my favorite celebrity did that to children, take them to the town square, tie a rope to each of their limbs, and have horses pull their body apart.
Kill. Them.
Then kill them.
If my favorite celebrity did that to children, take them to the town square, tie a rope to each of their limbs, and have horses pull their body apart.
Kill. Them.
Stop calling Pam Bondi a cunt.
She doesn’t have charisma, uniqueness, nerve, or talent.
She doesn’t have charisma, uniqueness, nerve, or talent.
February 12, 2026 at 11:54 PM
Stop calling Pam Bondi a cunt.
She doesn’t have charisma, uniqueness, nerve, or talent.
She doesn’t have charisma, uniqueness, nerve, or talent.
Chappell Roan and Orville Peck have both brooded the Wasserman talent agency after discovering its boss Casey Wasserman is tied to Epstein.
It’s no surprise that it’s queer artists standing on business when it comes to child abuse. We protect the vulnerable.
It’s no surprise that it’s queer artists standing on business when it comes to child abuse. We protect the vulnerable.
February 10, 2026 at 9:16 PM
Chappell Roan and Orville Peck have both brooded the Wasserman talent agency after discovering its boss Casey Wasserman is tied to Epstein.
It’s no surprise that it’s queer artists standing on business when it comes to child abuse. We protect the vulnerable.
It’s no surprise that it’s queer artists standing on business when it comes to child abuse. We protect the vulnerable.
Reposted by Mari Cohn
we need to talk about that Ring Super Bowl ad
February 10, 2026 at 8:18 PM
we need to talk about that Ring Super Bowl ad
You mean to tell me this was gasted by a flabber?
February 10, 2026 at 8:30 PM
You mean to tell me this was gasted by a flabber?
Reposted by Mari Cohn
always so funny to me when people are like “how am I supposed to explain Gay to my kids?” my kid asks me way harder shit all the time. “why did they build the road this way? why are some people bad?” I don’t know. please ask me about Gay
February 10, 2026 at 2:51 AM
always so funny to me when people are like “how am I supposed to explain Gay to my kids?” my kid asks me way harder shit all the time. “why did they build the road this way? why are some people bad?” I don’t know. please ask me about Gay
All they had to do was give us housing, healthcare, and UBI.
But now we all know that they eat babies
But now we all know that they eat babies
February 10, 2026 at 6:48 AM
All they had to do was give us housing, healthcare, and UBI.
But now we all know that they eat babies
But now we all know that they eat babies
You know what I love?
Gay bars where the bathroom signs say “only stalls” and “mostly a trough” so everyone knows what fixtures are inside, uses whatever fits their needs, and nobody cares who they’re next to because we’re all adults who need to do a basic human function.
Republicans are so weird.
Gay bars where the bathroom signs say “only stalls” and “mostly a trough” so everyone knows what fixtures are inside, uses whatever fits their needs, and nobody cares who they’re next to because we’re all adults who need to do a basic human function.
Republicans are so weird.
February 10, 2026 at 6:04 AM
You know what I love?
Gay bars where the bathroom signs say “only stalls” and “mostly a trough” so everyone knows what fixtures are inside, uses whatever fits their needs, and nobody cares who they’re next to because we’re all adults who need to do a basic human function.
Republicans are so weird.
Gay bars where the bathroom signs say “only stalls” and “mostly a trough” so everyone knows what fixtures are inside, uses whatever fits their needs, and nobody cares who they’re next to because we’re all adults who need to do a basic human function.
Republicans are so weird.
Reposted by Mari Cohn
Depressed to hear how many people showed up to city hall in SUPPORT of building a giant data center here. Michigan holds 21% of the world's fresh water. If we poison it, we're cooked, especially in the US. This is "destroying the Amazon rainforest" level of serious.
February 10, 2026 at 3:21 AM
Depressed to hear how many people showed up to city hall in SUPPORT of building a giant data center here. Michigan holds 21% of the world's fresh water. If we poison it, we're cooked, especially in the US. This is "destroying the Amazon rainforest" level of serious.
Reposted by Mari Cohn
the first choice is literally what Jesus would teach, i feel like i'm losing my mind
February 9, 2026 at 6:06 PM
the first choice is literally what Jesus would teach, i feel like i'm losing my mind
Supporters said they left over the Access Hollywood tape.
Supporters said they left over Charlottesville.
Supporters said they left over January 6th.
Now supporters are saying they’re leaving over the Epstein Files.
I DON’T BELIEVE HIS FUCKING SUPPORTERS.
Supporters said they left over Charlottesville.
Supporters said they left over January 6th.
Now supporters are saying they’re leaving over the Epstein Files.
I DON’T BELIEVE HIS FUCKING SUPPORTERS.
February 10, 2026 at 5:30 AM
Supporters said they left over the Access Hollywood tape.
Supporters said they left over Charlottesville.
Supporters said they left over January 6th.
Now supporters are saying they’re leaving over the Epstein Files.
I DON’T BELIEVE HIS FUCKING SUPPORTERS.
Supporters said they left over Charlottesville.
Supporters said they left over January 6th.
Now supporters are saying they’re leaving over the Epstein Files.
I DON’T BELIEVE HIS FUCKING SUPPORTERS.
The American economy is being held together with AI and crypto and Americans’ sanity is being held together with the Muppet Show and Benito Bowl
February 10, 2026 at 4:25 AM
The American economy is being held together with AI and crypto and Americans’ sanity is being held together with the Muppet Show and Benito Bowl
Reposted by Mari Cohn
AOC on DHS Warehouses: I think every American should be alarmed. They are building—and have built—a black box system that disappears people, both immigrants and U.S. citizens alike.
February 10, 2026 at 1:30 AM
AOC on DHS Warehouses: I think every American should be alarmed. They are building—and have built—a black box system that disappears people, both immigrants and U.S. citizens alike.
Tell me you’re a Druid main in D&D without telling me you’re a Druid main:
Tear them down and return them to nature. Let the wetlands return and the vines strangle the concrete
February 9, 2026 at 7:46 PM
Tell me you’re a Druid main in D&D without telling me you’re a Druid main:
As an Argentinean of European descent, I’m often dismissed by other Latinos for not being Latino. And tbh we did it to ourselves with our racism and colonialism.
But seeing Benito shout us out and wave our flag alongside the other countries made my heart swell 🥹🇦🇷
But seeing Benito shout us out and wave our flag alongside the other countries made my heart swell 🥹🇦🇷
February 9, 2026 at 7:33 PM
As an Argentinean of European descent, I’m often dismissed by other Latinos for not being Latino. And tbh we did it to ourselves with our racism and colonialism.
But seeing Benito shout us out and wave our flag alongside the other countries made my heart swell 🥹🇦🇷
But seeing Benito shout us out and wave our flag alongside the other countries made my heart swell 🥹🇦🇷
Reposted by Mari Cohn
I tell you what, Ring figured out exactly how to weaponize white people’s empathy in service to a corporately controlled surveillance state.
Tell them it will find your dog.
Tell them it will find your dog.
February 9, 2026 at 2:08 AM
I tell you what, Ring figured out exactly how to weaponize white people’s empathy in service to a corporately controlled surveillance state.
Tell them it will find your dog.
Tell them it will find your dog.
I have a master’s degree from Columbia and now I do this
February 9, 2026 at 7:01 AM
I have a master’s degree from Columbia and now I do this
Good evening, America.
It’s recently come to my attention that San Francisco and Seattle are rival teams. That goes to show how little I follow sports.
The sentiment holds, though. Fuck Tom Brady’s team.
It’s recently come to my attention that San Francisco and Seattle are rival teams. That goes to show how little I follow sports.
The sentiment holds, though. Fuck Tom Brady’s team.
WEST COAST, BEST COAST!
February 9, 2026 at 6:04 AM
Good evening, America.
It’s recently come to my attention that San Francisco and Seattle are rival teams. That goes to show how little I follow sports.
The sentiment holds, though. Fuck Tom Brady’s team.
It’s recently come to my attention that San Francisco and Seattle are rival teams. That goes to show how little I follow sports.
The sentiment holds, though. Fuck Tom Brady’s team.
By the way, I’m very hot
February 9, 2026 at 4:09 AM
By the way, I’m very hot
I predicted Bad Bunny would bring Lady Gaga out to sing “Americano” so I was half right.
February 9, 2026 at 3:59 AM
I predicted Bad Bunny would bring Lady Gaga out to sing “Americano” so I was half right.
Reposted by Mari Cohn
the bushes were people 😂
February 9, 2026 at 2:26 AM
the bushes were people 😂
WEST COAST, BEST COAST!
February 9, 2026 at 3:24 AM
WEST COAST, BEST COAST!
I’m very happy with how this game is going. I’m not a Seahawks fan, but nobody from Boston should experience joy.
February 9, 2026 at 3:15 AM
I’m very happy with how this game is going. I’m not a Seahawks fan, but nobody from Boston should experience joy.
Ella es Estefanía Alemanotta, mi prima Puertorriqueña
February 9, 2026 at 2:47 AM
Ella es Estefanía Alemanotta, mi prima Puertorriqueña