Krystal
@krystalsim.bsky.social
Writer, fountain of useless trivia and queen of the raised eyebrow. Gobby Scottish Mum. She/her/hers.
Woke up to my Gen Alpha 3yo shouting “SIX SEVEN!”
It begins…
It begins…
November 23, 2025 at 11:30 AM
Woke up to my Gen Alpha 3yo shouting “SIX SEVEN!”
It begins…
It begins…
Scotland is going to the World Cup?! Does Del Amitri know?!
November 19, 2025 at 7:53 AM
Scotland is going to the World Cup?! Does Del Amitri know?!
Reposted by Krystal
It’s bizarre thinking that I met a nice bloke 14 years ago today at a games event and now our kid is watching Paw Patrol on the sofa as we plan how to occupy him over half term 😬🫠 The snack budget alone is terrifying
October 26, 2025 at 5:29 PM
It’s bizarre thinking that I met a nice bloke 14 years ago today at a games event and now our kid is watching Paw Patrol on the sofa as we plan how to occupy him over half term 😬🫠 The snack budget alone is terrifying
Reposted by Krystal
Just flown in from Riyadh, and boy are my excuses tired
October 10, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Just flown in from Riyadh, and boy are my excuses tired
I don’t pray but I’ll pray for Dolly. Not today, nope, don’t you even dare. Absolutely not and never.
Dolly Parton ‘going to be just fine’, singer’s sister says as she calls for prayers amid health problems
Dolly Parton ‘going to be just fine’, singer’s sister says as she calls for prayers amid health problems
Freida Parton says she has been ‘up all night praying’ as singer continues to deal with unspecified ‘health challenges’
Dolly Parton’s sister says she has been “up all night praying” for the singer as she continues to deal with unspecified health problems.
Freida Parton wrote that her 79-year-old sister “hasn’t been feeling her best lately”, two weeks after the singer postponed a Las Vegas residency scheduled for December, citing “health challenges”. Continue reading...
www.theguardian.com
October 8, 2025 at 8:08 AM
I don’t pray but I’ll pray for Dolly. Not today, nope, don’t you even dare. Absolutely not and never.
He tells pregnant people to “tough it out”. Like you did with those bone spurs, Donnie?
Blatant medical misogyny and ableism all wrapped in one speech. Pregnancy is hard and it is not a health-neutral event. But boy do a lot of old men want to convince us that it is.
Blatant medical misogyny and ableism all wrapped in one speech. Pregnancy is hard and it is not a health-neutral event. But boy do a lot of old men want to convince us that it is.
September 23, 2025 at 8:32 AM
He tells pregnant people to “tough it out”. Like you did with those bone spurs, Donnie?
Blatant medical misogyny and ableism all wrapped in one speech. Pregnancy is hard and it is not a health-neutral event. But boy do a lot of old men want to convince us that it is.
Blatant medical misogyny and ableism all wrapped in one speech. Pregnancy is hard and it is not a health-neutral event. But boy do a lot of old men want to convince us that it is.
Happy last washing day before the darkness consumes us all 🖤
September 19, 2025 at 11:49 AM
Happy last washing day before the darkness consumes us all 🖤
Reposted by Krystal
Reminder that nihilism and ironic detachment is obeying in advance. You’re better than that.
September 18, 2025 at 8:47 PM
Reminder that nihilism and ironic detachment is obeying in advance. You’re better than that.
Thunderbolts was good actually
August 30, 2025 at 9:57 PM
Thunderbolts was good actually
Proud to see Jamie Lee Curtis continue to bring milkshake to the yard. She has raised generations, you love to see it
August 21, 2025 at 8:40 AM
Proud to see Jamie Lee Curtis continue to bring milkshake to the yard. She has raised generations, you love to see it
My 3yo just asked if The Killing Moon was Shiny from Moana. I think Jermaine would be chuffed tbh
August 9, 2025 at 2:30 PM
My 3yo just asked if The Killing Moon was Shiny from Moana. I think Jermaine would be chuffed tbh
My fan canon is that Miranda in And Just Like That was swapped out for time travelling doppelgänger Ada in The Gilded Age. Because that lady is NOT Miranda Hobbes.
August 8, 2025 at 1:14 PM
My fan canon is that Miranda in And Just Like That was swapped out for time travelling doppelgänger Ada in The Gilded Age. Because that lady is NOT Miranda Hobbes.
The millennial urge to sing every word of Jennifer Paige, Crush in the office kitchen.
No, Krystal. You’re a professional apparently.
No, Krystal. You’re a professional apparently.
July 31, 2025 at 11:32 AM
The millennial urge to sing every word of Jennifer Paige, Crush in the office kitchen.
No, Krystal. You’re a professional apparently.
No, Krystal. You’re a professional apparently.
Reposted by Krystal
do not measure your lifespan in new elder scrolls releases unless you like depression
July 31, 2025 at 11:13 AM
do not measure your lifespan in new elder scrolls releases unless you like depression
Nothing beats a Jet2Holiday… except this image
July 25, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Nothing beats a Jet2Holiday… except this image
Like everyone tonight, I had a little cry while listening to Mama I’m Coming Home. Ozzy… there will never be your like again
July 22, 2025 at 9:07 PM
Like everyone tonight, I had a little cry while listening to Mama I’m Coming Home. Ozzy… there will never be your like again
Reposted by Krystal
Ozzy going out after raising $190 million for sick kids and a Parkinson’s cure is metal AF.
Ozzy Osbourne Farewell Show Was The Highest-Grossing Charity Concert Of All Time
On July 5, Ozzy Osbourne put on a farewell concert, performing as a solo artist and with Black Sabbath for the last time in the band’s hometown of Birmingham, UK. Billed as the “Back To The Beginning”...
www.stereogum.com
July 22, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Ozzy going out after raising $190 million for sick kids and a Parkinson’s cure is metal AF.
Folks… we’re all washing our bedding tomorrow right? It’s a textbook bedding heatwave. Sure you’ll have to shower five times but those towels will be a doddle
June 30, 2025 at 11:44 PM
Folks… we’re all washing our bedding tomorrow right? It’s a textbook bedding heatwave. Sure you’ll have to shower five times but those towels will be a doddle
I’m going to an outdoor gig on flying ant day 😬
June 29, 2025 at 2:43 PM
I’m going to an outdoor gig on flying ant day 😬
I'm gonna take my new RPD backpack everywhere <3
WHAT'RE YA BUYIN'?
This week we're adding new gear to our official Resident Evil collection - AND restocking some familiar favourites too.
See you on Friday at www.insertcoinclothing.com
This week we're adding new gear to our official Resident Evil collection - AND restocking some familiar favourites too.
See you on Friday at www.insertcoinclothing.com
June 21, 2025 at 9:41 AM
I'm gonna take my new RPD backpack everywhere <3
Nine Inch Nails were incredible this week. Basically one of the best gigs I’ve been to.
Following that up by seeing a fictional animated metal band. DETHKLOK, M8
Following that up by seeing a fictional animated metal band. DETHKLOK, M8
a cartoon of a metal band playing guitars and drums on stage .
ALT: a cartoon of a metal band playing guitars and drums on stage .
media.tenor.com
June 21, 2025 at 9:08 AM
Nine Inch Nails were incredible this week. Basically one of the best gigs I’ve been to.
Following that up by seeing a fictional animated metal band. DETHKLOK, M8
Following that up by seeing a fictional animated metal band. DETHKLOK, M8
I never thought the sound of squeaking tanks would make me gut laugh this much
June 16, 2025 at 10:18 AM
I never thought the sound of squeaking tanks would make me gut laugh this much
I’m now that person who can’t leave B&Q without flowers. It took 41 years, but we made it lads waaaaay
June 14, 2025 at 1:49 PM
I’m now that person who can’t leave B&Q without flowers. It took 41 years, but we made it lads waaaaay
Dave syndrome has hit me hard, lads. I’m too Scottish for this heat, send help and mair Irn-Bru
June 13, 2025 at 2:56 PM
Dave syndrome has hit me hard, lads. I’m too Scottish for this heat, send help and mair Irn-Bru