Finally got around to watching that HBO Chernobyl mini-series and I only wonder when, not if, this exact or equivalent type of catastrophic scenario will happen in the US. I’d guess MUCH sooner rather than later.

“With every lie told, it incurs a debt to the truth. That debt must always be repaid.”

if the united states ever has even a hope of recovering we have to destroy the idea of american individualism. "they don't owe you anything" we owe each other everything actually

My gf and I at the bank:

“Just need a replace debit card, please.”

Banker:

“Sometimes when I get way too drunk, I lay on the floor of my bathroom in a ball and turn on the shower just to hear rain noises”

In light of the constant barrage of horrid events that shake our core, my partner and I are having AI write us a new story about our cat nightly. Last night, she was a hip-hop legend; tonight, she is a drag queen. Please don't forget to make time for humor. Joy is an act of rebellion after all

Their fans are insufferable, too

If you're interested in dry January, are sober, or sober curious, here is a wonderful interview on N/A Beer Culture with my sis

Packer games like this remind me that actually football is a barbaric endeavor and has no place in civilized society, so we can just get rid of it

Manifesting this Assistant Professor position by preemptively mapping my roller-blading route through Philly

Teaching writing last term has gotten me in the mood to write more creatively than academically

I slipped in countless “The You You Are” quotes in as examples/prompts last term. It needs to be a real book.

@benstiller.redhour.com I’ll ghostwrite the rest of it, let’s make some coin and donate it

Channeling my inner Julio Torres in Problemista for my interview tomorrow

Me explaining to film bros that Nosferatu was an uninspired, meandering cash grab

Lyft driver blasting an Alvin and the Chipmunks Xmas album and I’m living for it

If you can’t love me at “bringing a Lunchable charcuterie board” for Friendsgiving, you don’t deserve me at my “bringing a bowl of pre-packaged instant mashed potatoes” to the function