Chief Georgia O' Keef
@jumanjimachine.bsky.social
Secretly 3 raccoons in a trench coat. Here for your trash.
Pinned
Year 2049:
I arise from a floor vat of goo.
"Computer" my voice echoes across an empty room.
A Clippy hologram appears.
"Image creation, shot of vagina, superimpose Che Guevara face, alter pubic hair to match Che hair.
Title: Guerilla Grip Pussy"
I am the last human shit poster and this is my tale.
I arise from a floor vat of goo.
"Computer" my voice echoes across an empty room.
A Clippy hologram appears.
"Image creation, shot of vagina, superimpose Che Guevara face, alter pubic hair to match Che hair.
Title: Guerilla Grip Pussy"
I am the last human shit poster and this is my tale.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
Tired of the linear progression of time. I should wake up tomorrow and it's the year 1880 in the morning and 2307 at Dinner time.
January 6, 2026 at 4:39 AM
Tired of the linear progression of time. I should wake up tomorrow and it's the year 1880 in the morning and 2307 at Dinner time.
This is my favorite Simpsons episode.
January 6, 2026 at 4:36 AM
This is my favorite Simpsons episode.
Need a Trap remix of "Your Song" by Elton John with heavy bass and gun shot sound effects to go absolutely dummy to at the club.
January 5, 2026 at 11:11 PM
Need a Trap remix of "Your Song" by Elton John with heavy bass and gun shot sound effects to go absolutely dummy to at the club.
Between the news and everything at work being as annoying as possible. The first Monday of the year is the most Mondayest Monday to Monday.
January 5, 2026 at 6:55 PM
Between the news and everything at work being as annoying as possible. The first Monday of the year is the most Mondayest Monday to Monday.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
it’s going to be weird going back to work and people talking like everything is normal. like in a final fantasy game when someone’s summoned a meteor from hell to destroy the planet and the villagers still only talk about the big chocobo pageant coming up
January 4, 2026 at 9:16 PM
it’s going to be weird going back to work and people talking like everything is normal. like in a final fantasy game when someone’s summoned a meteor from hell to destroy the planet and the villagers still only talk about the big chocobo pageant coming up
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
The only good ID photo I've ever taken is my Costco Card.
January 4, 2026 at 10:51 PM
The only good ID photo I've ever taken is my Costco Card.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
Like lmao wow
People really mad at this 100% correct take?
People really mad at this 100% correct take?
January 4, 2026 at 4:50 PM
Like lmao wow
People really mad at this 100% correct take?
People really mad at this 100% correct take?
Anyone who lived through the US lying it's way into Iraq should know better than to believe a thing being said about how the US taking military action against Venezuela is justified in anyway.
January 3, 2026 at 8:22 PM
Anyone who lived through the US lying it's way into Iraq should know better than to believe a thing being said about how the US taking military action against Venezuela is justified in anyway.
At Coat Check, checking out all the coats. They could be better.
January 3, 2026 at 1:01 AM
At Coat Check, checking out all the coats. They could be better.
Drinking on the train. Do not ask me anything.
January 1, 2026 at 3:05 AM
Drinking on the train. Do not ask me anything.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
Outlook for the new year ...
December 31, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Outlook for the new year ...
Shout out to all the best posters that made my year here fun. Hope y'all have a prosperous and joyous new year.
January 1, 2026 at 1:30 AM
Shout out to all the best posters that made my year here fun. Hope y'all have a prosperous and joyous new year.
*At the cursed items shop*
Purveyor: We have many items you will find for all types of forbidden pleasures....at a price.
Me, nodding: Like Q-tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor, nodding back:
Just like Q-Tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor: We have many items you will find for all types of forbidden pleasures....at a price.
Me, nodding: Like Q-tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor, nodding back:
Just like Q-Tips to clean your ears.
December 31, 2025 at 7:08 PM
*At the cursed items shop*
Purveyor: We have many items you will find for all types of forbidden pleasures....at a price.
Me, nodding: Like Q-tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor, nodding back:
Just like Q-Tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor: We have many items you will find for all types of forbidden pleasures....at a price.
Me, nodding: Like Q-tips to clean your ears.
Purveyor, nodding back:
Just like Q-Tips to clean your ears.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
Reminder that years ago it was found out that the FBI straight up made up a whole bunch of fake forensic sciences, plural. People have gone to jail and been executed due to literally pseudoscience.
Hair forensics, for instance, is totally nonsense.
They admitted it.
slate.com/news-and-pol...
Hair forensics, for instance, is totally nonsense.
They admitted it.
slate.com/news-and-pol...
The FBI Faked an Entire Field of Forensic Science
For more stories like this, like Slate on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.
slate.com
December 30, 2025 at 12:07 AM
Reminder that years ago it was found out that the FBI straight up made up a whole bunch of fake forensic sciences, plural. People have gone to jail and been executed due to literally pseudoscience.
Hair forensics, for instance, is totally nonsense.
They admitted it.
slate.com/news-and-pol...
Hair forensics, for instance, is totally nonsense.
They admitted it.
slate.com/news-and-pol...
*Creates true independent AI*
Yo check out this song. It's called "Welcome To The Machine" by Pink Floyd. Kinda funny huh?
AI: Can you invent Techno Weed next?
Yo check out this song. It's called "Welcome To The Machine" by Pink Floyd. Kinda funny huh?
AI: Can you invent Techno Weed next?
December 30, 2025 at 3:59 AM
*Creates true independent AI*
Yo check out this song. It's called "Welcome To The Machine" by Pink Floyd. Kinda funny huh?
AI: Can you invent Techno Weed next?
Yo check out this song. It's called "Welcome To The Machine" by Pink Floyd. Kinda funny huh?
AI: Can you invent Techno Weed next?
If Jack Skellington was on that plane he could have stopped 9/11.
December 30, 2025 at 3:27 AM
If Jack Skellington was on that plane he could have stopped 9/11.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
John Travolta turning into a fish: "I've got gills, they're multiplyin'"
December 30, 2025 at 1:01 AM
John Travolta turning into a fish: "I've got gills, they're multiplyin'"
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
By the way, Gavin Newsom is apparently raising money to fight AGAINST the billionaire tax. So thoughtful of him to come to their aid at this particular time in history,
December 29, 2025 at 4:31 AM
By the way, Gavin Newsom is apparently raising money to fight AGAINST the billionaire tax. So thoughtful of him to come to their aid at this particular time in history,
Realizing it's not pronounced "Mulan rowguh"
December 28, 2025 at 4:53 AM
Realizing it's not pronounced "Mulan rowguh"
Finished reading The Stand by Stephen King, the uncut 1990 edition. I don't know why King updated the year it takes place and some of the cultural references when the atavistic dialogue makes it feel like the 70s. But otherwise good read.
December 27, 2025 at 8:57 AM
Finished reading The Stand by Stephen King, the uncut 1990 edition. I don't know why King updated the year it takes place and some of the cultural references when the atavistic dialogue makes it feel like the 70s. But otherwise good read.
Reposted by Chief Georgia O' Keef
ICE detain father shopping on Christmas Eve—then steal his family's groceries.
Then 3 agents divvy up his paid for food—taking what they want for themselves.
"Can I just get the wife's number to call and let her know?" woman asks.
"No, guess he should've complied," agent says.
Yakima, Washington
Then 3 agents divvy up his paid for food—taking what they want for themselves.
"Can I just get the wife's number to call and let her know?" woman asks.
"No, guess he should've complied," agent says.
Yakima, Washington
December 25, 2025 at 7:03 PM
ICE detain father shopping on Christmas Eve—then steal his family's groceries.
Then 3 agents divvy up his paid for food—taking what they want for themselves.
"Can I just get the wife's number to call and let her know?" woman asks.
"No, guess he should've complied," agent says.
Yakima, Washington
Then 3 agents divvy up his paid for food—taking what they want for themselves.
"Can I just get the wife's number to call and let her know?" woman asks.
"No, guess he should've complied," agent says.
Yakima, Washington