Jesus Zoidberg
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jesuszoidberg.bsky.social
Jesus Zoidberg
@jesuszoidberg.bsky.social
I talk Philly Sports, Pro Wrestling, Politics, and Phuturama, and other stuff that doesn't begin with P.

Real person with a fake name, or vice versa.

❤️❤️❤️ Mom 6/10/57 to 4/6/25
Success in life is measured by the type of person you are.
Pinned
Cowboys really are America's team, both are run by an old fool that surrounds himself with nepotistic and or sycophantic hires, each less qualified than the last.
I'd prefer to sleep in a race car next to a Supermodel.
Schultz: Tua Tagovailoa remains cut candidate but Dolphins would prefer to find trade partner.
February 16, 2026 at 4:49 PM
February 16, 2026 at 4:36 PM
On what, a Segway?
Mike Trout says he’ll move back to playing CF this year.
He also wanted to play in the WBC but insurance prevented him from playing, calling it disappointing
February 16, 2026 at 3:41 PM
Oh man, it could be anyone! Mike Scott, Jerryd Bayless, Georges Niang! Anybody!
Ran through the numbers the other day, but we're now at the point in the schedule where the Sixers can fit two prorated vet min contracts without going over the tax, hence the timing of the Cam Payne news.

Still one more slot to fill.
Sixers have $1.576m in space under tax to sign 2 players. Right now a rest-of-season minimum would cost ~$844k, so Sixers can't fit 2 signings in that space.

Need to get this down to $788k per prorated min, which will happen in approx 5 days.

Would expect buyout signing / Walker conversion then.
February 16, 2026 at 3:18 PM
What's wrong, they couldn't have signed Isaiah Canaan again?
February 16, 2026 at 3:14 PM
The new Z'Darius Smith just dropped!
February 16, 2026 at 2:46 PM
Oh man, they're cooking now!
Over the weekend, 10 Day contracts with the Philadelphia 76ers for Patrick Baldwin Jr. and Charles Bassey expired.
Baldwin can sign another 10 Day with the Sixers. This was Bassey's second 10 Day deal. To keep Bassey on the roster, Philadelphia would have to sign him for the remainder of the season.
February 16, 2026 at 2:25 PM
Scared the dog yelling like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas after seeing that Simpsons picture.
February 16, 2026 at 2:02 AM
High quality picture of our guy @dhm.bsky.social in an episode of the Simpsons. So cool and awesome for them to do. Wearing his awesome Eagles jacket. ❤️
Truly one of the most special and unique tributes to everyone’s pal
February 16, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg
That’s Dan❤️‍🩹🦅
Top right corner. Can't help but wonder if The Simpsons paid subtle tribute to Dan McQuade in tonight's set-in-Philadelphia 800th episode.
February 16, 2026 at 1:55 AM
Dude, I mean.
Truly one of the most special and unique tributes to everyone’s pal
February 16, 2026 at 1:55 AM
Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg
So is that @dhm.bsky.social at the top right?
February 16, 2026 at 1:20 AM
They matter so little, yet, everyone is losing their shit over them.
They have so much name value they don't get debuted in TV in Australia they do it on a house show.

They're names don't matter.
February 15, 2026 at 10:55 PM
February 15, 2026 at 10:47 PM
Seriously, you don't get to be an ally and puff out your chest on issues and then be a giant misogynist asshole because the company you like signed some women that you don't think are up to your standards. And it's been a lot of people, and it's gross.
February 15, 2026 at 10:39 PM
Good to see AEW fans have someone else to be very weird about besides MJF.
February 15, 2026 at 10:33 PM
No, sports is way more important.
Some things are WAY more important than sports.
Get your priorities straight.
February 15, 2026 at 10:27 PM
The 3 worst baseball managers I've ever seen in my life were Gabe Kapler, Ryne Sandberg, and Joe Girardi. But hey, they played.
February 15, 2026 at 10:24 PM
My brother is Pennsylvania Dutch, so I'm just going to hang onto him in the Real American rankings.
I'm more American than these fucks. My paternal lineage predates the revolution.
February 15, 2026 at 10:11 PM
You know what must really stick in his pea brain; that the players in that locker room all seemed to choose the guy who never played the game at the major league level over him.
The outfielder talked to reporters at the Padres’ spring training complex. Of his time with the Phillies, he said: “The one thing that I wish would’ve ended up different is that we would’ve won.”
New Padre Nick Castellanos says he’s glad to play for a manager who has ‘done it’ on the field
www.inquirer.com
February 15, 2026 at 10:09 PM
Our common heritage; eat my fucking balls. Everyone in my tree came over here past 1850, guess I don't belong here.
February 15, 2026 at 10:08 PM
You think people may have backed the wrong horse with the Casty love?
February 15, 2026 at 10:06 PM
I think the AEW fanbase is generally more well informed than the average fanbase, but there is definitely a "Like the smell of our own farts" issue going on.
February 15, 2026 at 10:02 PM
Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg
I’ve never seen so many useless people get so mad at something so fucking pointless to get mad at. Stupid ass fanbase acting like that tag team took a picture with Marty Scurll or something.
February 15, 2026 at 9:50 PM