Johnny 🫧 Cowlick
@jefferycowlick.bsky.social
Trust me, I've tried everything. Nothing works.
MSEd, ABCd. Lover of sarcasm, good coffee and bad hair days.
Winner of the Mark Twain Prize for Best Bed Head.
Hair care products and harebrained politics are a volatile combination.
MSEd, ABCd. Lover of sarcasm, good coffee and bad hair days.
Winner of the Mark Twain Prize for Best Bed Head.
Hair care products and harebrained politics are a volatile combination.
Pinned
Reposted by Johnny 🫧 Cowlick
Hey, you know who's not in the Epstein Files?
Nicolás Maduro
Nicolás Maduro
January 5, 2026 at 6:05 PM
Hey, you know who's not in the Epstein Files?
Nicolás Maduro
Nicolás Maduro
Precisely.
This situation is precisely why we have impeachment
January 6, 2026 at 6:09 AM
Precisely.
Donald Trump doesn't know what Congress is.
Does anyone here believe trump gives a shit about Congress?
January 6, 2026 at 6:08 AM
Donald Trump doesn't know what Congress is.
Okay MAGAs, now are you ready to admit that you're idiots?
January 5, 2026 at 7:46 PM
Okay MAGAs, now are you ready to admit that you're idiots?
Proof positive that you cannot make this shit up.
January 5, 2026 at 7:16 PM
Proof positive that you cannot make this shit up.
Mark Kelly is a PhD, astronaut, veteran, patriot and true America hero.
Donald Trump is a 34x convicted felon, child sex predator, Russian asset and trust fund nepo baby who's been sucking on a silver pacifier his whole life.
And Pete Hesgseth is Donald's drunk little pool boy.
Donald Trump is a 34x convicted felon, child sex predator, Russian asset and trust fund nepo baby who's been sucking on a silver pacifier his whole life.
And Pete Hesgseth is Donald's drunk little pool boy.
Four generations of my family have served our country. Service is in my blood. The President wouldn’t know anything about that.
January 5, 2026 at 7:11 PM
Mark Kelly is a PhD, astronaut, veteran, patriot and true America hero.
Donald Trump is a 34x convicted felon, child sex predator, Russian asset and trust fund nepo baby who's been sucking on a silver pacifier his whole life.
And Pete Hesgseth is Donald's drunk little pool boy.
Donald Trump is a 34x convicted felon, child sex predator, Russian asset and trust fund nepo baby who's been sucking on a silver pacifier his whole life.
And Pete Hesgseth is Donald's drunk little pool boy.
Add 'Kidnapping' to the 34x convicted felons rap sheet.
January 5, 2026 at 6:23 PM
Add 'Kidnapping' to the 34x convicted felons rap sheet.
So if the question was,
"Will Donald Trump do anything to distract from the Epstein files?"
we now know that the answer is a resounding,
"Yes."
"Will Donald Trump do anything to distract from the Epstein files?"
we now know that the answer is a resounding,
"Yes."
January 5, 2026 at 6:15 PM
So if the question was,
"Will Donald Trump do anything to distract from the Epstein files?"
we now know that the answer is a resounding,
"Yes."
"Will Donald Trump do anything to distract from the Epstein files?"
we now know that the answer is a resounding,
"Yes."
BREAKING:
FIFA just named Donald Trump the Venezuela national football team's Midfielder of the Year ⚽
FIFA just named Donald Trump the Venezuela national football team's Midfielder of the Year ⚽
January 5, 2026 at 6:11 PM
BREAKING:
FIFA just named Donald Trump the Venezuela national football team's Midfielder of the Year ⚽
FIFA just named Donald Trump the Venezuela national football team's Midfielder of the Year ⚽
Wouldn't it be hilarious if one day Donald Trump had to share a prison cell with Nicolás Maduro?
January 5, 2026 at 6:08 PM
Wouldn't it be hilarious if one day Donald Trump had to share a prison cell with Nicolás Maduro?
Hey, you know who's not in the Epstein Files?
Nicolás Maduro
Nicolás Maduro
January 5, 2026 at 6:04 PM
Hey, you know who's not in the Epstein Files?
Nicolás Maduro
Nicolás Maduro
If a 34x convicted felon pedophile and functionally illiterate Russian asset being elected twice isn't proof, I don't know what is.
Uneducated voters will always be a greater danger to this country than immigrants.
January 5, 2026 at 6:02 PM
If a 34x convicted felon pedophile and functionally illiterate Russian asset being elected twice isn't proof, I don't know what is.
Between bailing out Argentina, tax cuts for the rich, and running Venezuela indefinitely, it's no wonder Donald J. Trump can't find any money to provide food, housing or insurance for Americans.
January 4, 2026 at 6:20 AM
Between bailing out Argentina, tax cuts for the rich, and running Venezuela indefinitely, it's no wonder Donald J. Trump can't find any money to provide food, housing or insurance for Americans.
It's days like this when I wish we still had a functioning democracy with effective checks and balances.
January 4, 2026 at 6:03 AM
It's days like this when I wish we still had a functioning democracy with effective checks and balances.
January 3, 2026 at 6:50 PM
Bigly.
It’s the United States that needs regime change.
January 3, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Bigly.
The Onion: Prophetic as Always
January 3, 2026 at 6:44 PM
The Onion: Prophetic as Always
I miss the good old days when U.S. presidents didn't hold press conferences about sensitive military operations with profound global implications from their tacky country club in Florida.
January 3, 2026 at 6:34 PM
I miss the good old days when U.S. presidents didn't hold press conferences about sensitive military operations with profound global implications from their tacky country club in Florida.
PREDICTION:
If this attack on Venezuela and capture of Nicolás Maduro doesn't turn out well for the Trump administration, President DJT will claim that Joe Biden ordered the operation.
If this attack on Venezuela and capture of Nicolás Maduro doesn't turn out well for the Trump administration, President DJT will claim that Joe Biden ordered the operation.
January 3, 2026 at 6:31 PM
PREDICTION:
If this attack on Venezuela and capture of Nicolás Maduro doesn't turn out well for the Trump administration, President DJT will claim that Joe Biden ordered the operation.
If this attack on Venezuela and capture of Nicolás Maduro doesn't turn out well for the Trump administration, President DJT will claim that Joe Biden ordered the operation.
"I'm not going to start a war, I'll stop wars."
-- Donald J. Trump, lying on the campaign trail in 2024
-- Donald J. Trump, lying on the campaign trail in 2024
January 3, 2026 at 6:26 PM
"I'm not going to start a war, I'll stop wars."
-- Donald J. Trump, lying on the campaign trail in 2024
-- Donald J. Trump, lying on the campaign trail in 2024
"We are going to run Venezuela." -- President DJT
"I am also renaming the country:
The Donald J. Trump Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela."
"I am also renaming the country:
The Donald J. Trump Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela."
January 3, 2026 at 6:16 PM
"We are going to run Venezuela." -- President DJT
"I am also renaming the country:
The Donald J. Trump Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela."
"I am also renaming the country:
The Donald J. Trump Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela."
BREAKING: Zohran Mamdani is Already Cleaning Up New York City
January 2, 2026 at 7:06 PM
BREAKING: Zohran Mamdani is Already Cleaning Up New York City