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guiltysmith.bsky.social
Marv
@guiltysmith.bsky.social
No one of consequence. Maybe listen if I'm talking about structural engineering but you can safely ignore anything else.
Pinned
American cars are too complicated now. When will Detroit again make a car I could steal one piece at a time over several years?
It's so good the only flaw is when your mother in law sends more kimchi than the box can handle you feel like you have to buy the post office a new building to say sorry
January 9, 2026 at 12:33 AM
I mean it's Twain and then Chesterton right? I know it's cheating to just pick writers with a 100 mph zinger but they'd be magnificent in this form
Do you have a historical figure you most wish got to be a poster? I feel like you must have a better answer than mine, which is Churchill. The guy started autobiography when he was 19 I think. And just never stopped. True poster.
January 7, 2026 at 12:48 AM
People are so funny about dads and infants "she looks just like you!"
She's a day old Korean infant, it's ok she looks more like her mom than a gaunt white guy with a beard
January 4, 2026 at 2:57 PM
It's the end of days, an angel wearing a flat billed baseball cap that he does not remove in the presence of the Eucharist appears to me. He makes theologically incoherent accusations of mariolotry and miscegenation for some reason. Then he shoots me with a gold AR-15.
Every time this happens (and it happens kind of a lot) I think about how annoyed I'll be if it turns out the right religion is the one that's just mine but illiterate and dumb
January 3, 2026 at 6:22 PM
I don't care how large your venue is, 76 is entirely too many trombones
December 28, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Please imagine I did that thing where you add a speech bubble to Jim Jeffries and also that you know who Jim Jeffreis is on sight
Nah you're fine everyone already knows
December 27, 2025 at 12:26 PM
Just witnessed an incredible bit, daytime nurse relieved night nurse, erased the night nurse's name from the whiteboard and then wrote the same name down because they have the same name
December 24, 2025 at 1:05 PM
Am I to understand one of the last things Jeff Epstein the new York financier did was write a hamfisted "as you know" letter to another child abuser?
December 23, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Last week ICE was prowling around some schools in Columbus Ohio and they were foiled by not opening the doors, all the kids being released at once and immediately put on their bus, and the principal just going out and telling them they had to leave school property.
December 22, 2025 at 2:26 PM
I'm going to go back in time to blasphemously edit the didache to explicitly forbid this
Prestonwood Baptist Church in Plano, Texas...$70 per ticket.
December 20, 2025 at 12:06 AM
I usually regard the division of STEM and the humanities as artificial and something that blinds more than it illuminates but the job markets really are different and it's rough for them. Academia (not TT, but as much money as humanities TT) is literally my backup.
December 19, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Going to make a bg3 mod that does nothing but let you respond to that mummy asking you what a life is worth with "$13.7 mil" (the NRI Value of Statistical Life)
December 17, 2025 at 4:44 PM
What percentage of Paul Tsongas' legacy is Homer rhyming his name with "sexual congress"?
Probably not much as it was after season 12, but maybe 1-2% right?
December 16, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Why isn't there a cartoon fisher cat on the TV telling me when skin grafts are half off?
Scalise: "Everybody complains, 'Why when I watch TV do I see this Gecko lizard & emu & all these animals out there selling car insurance & homeowners insurance? Why aren't they selling healthcare?' That's bc federal laws prohibit people to have choices for lower cost products for health insurance"
December 16, 2025 at 5:11 PM
I've never been so poised to disappoint someone as I am now, when a collaborator has refered to me as "the mathematician" to our boss.
Sir, I have the same degrees as you. I just didn't forget the course on statistical methods
December 15, 2025 at 7:23 PM
The thing about the phrase "birthing person" is the only people I've heard use it are midwives and the idea that they of all people devaluing women is so preposterous you should pinch yourself if you think it.
Ana Kasparian claims the left turned on her over her opposition to being called a "birthing person".

Ana Kasparian: "I don't have kids, I don't want to have kids, and I don't want to be called a 'birthing person', I find it super insulting."
December 12, 2025 at 3:38 PM
Cool dog thanks for messing with my workspace last night
December 10, 2025 at 2:16 PM
I don't know how useful they think an ai that can only handle cui is going to be in the Pentagon even if it worked like they imagine it does
December 9, 2025 at 9:05 PM
At an advent fair where a friend is showing her donkey and this church calls themself a "worship center" instead of a church and I'm wondering if the bishop is mad at them or something
December 6, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Bringing back the Dodge Magnum again with wood panels would be sick. But also it could meet fuel economy standards no problem, just copy Suburus homework
Sean Duffy on slashing fuel economy standards: "This rule will actually allow you to bring back the 1970s station wagon. Maybe a little wood paneling on the side. We can bring back choice to consumers."
December 4, 2025 at 3:38 PM
So everything else about them aside Blackwater is a terrible name right? Metal sounding or not it's sewage
December 3, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Doing the Ringo Starr "peace and love but stop sending mail peace and love" but about baby blankets.
November 27, 2025 at 7:03 PM
My wife is unfamiliar with a lot of European food and this results in fun things like making her finish her sandwich before revealing what headcheese is and unfun things like explaining what veal is
November 26, 2025 at 1:14 AM
You must have an air purifier in every room because of a chemical spill 30 years ago (ok fine lackadaisical regular dumping). But the fines in the souls lab clog the filters. The solution is the dumbest thing I've ever seen.
November 24, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Sure sex is good but have you ever had a colleague with a different background than you ask about a 300 level problem for a class you have taught?
November 20, 2025 at 4:09 PM