GOOBER © (Official)
@goober.bsky.social
culture war veteran 3 tours. simper fi hoo rah
guineas world record holder for flop posting 🏅
Pfp alt text: Marjorie Taylor Greene with a comically large mouth
Header alt text: Uhaul logo but it says "uhhhhhh"
He/Him
guineas world record holder for flop posting 🏅
Pfp alt text: Marjorie Taylor Greene with a comically large mouth
Header alt text: Uhaul logo but it says "uhhhhhh"
He/Him
Pinned
piss a mile in my pants
please do it to him Iran
January 28, 2026 at 3:35 AM
please do it to him Iran
yall can call me anytime you want but i may not answer
January 27, 2026 at 1:31 AM
yall can call me anytime you want but i may not answer
bro music industry is over. Regular people at the bar feeding me ai music
January 24, 2026 at 8:18 AM
bro music industry is over. Regular people at the bar feeding me ai music
i love you. you reading this. on my bung
January 24, 2026 at 2:58 AM
i love you. you reading this. on my bung
got a like on hinge from a girl. i sent her a voice note then she immediately unmatched me. in life you flop over and over again until you mostly just keep flopping and fumbling forever.
January 23, 2026 at 6:06 PM
got a like on hinge from a girl. i sent her a voice note then she immediately unmatched me. in life you flop over and over again until you mostly just keep flopping and fumbling forever.
EGG YOGA. its where we all eat eggs, do yoga and its a fart safe zone.
January 23, 2026 at 3:48 PM
EGG YOGA. its where we all eat eggs, do yoga and its a fart safe zone.
Reposted by GOOBER © (Official)
i am actively learning how to make the pussy omelette
January 23, 2026 at 3:40 PM
i am actively learning how to make the pussy omelette
BRAND NEW: Small Vape™ now even smaller and even harder to find!
January 23, 2026 at 3:36 PM
BRAND NEW: Small Vape™ now even smaller and even harder to find!
*japan is living in 2050*
then its just an egg that was cooked in the most fucked up way
then its just an egg that was cooked in the most fucked up way
January 22, 2026 at 10:22 PM
*japan is living in 2050*
then its just an egg that was cooked in the most fucked up way
then its just an egg that was cooked in the most fucked up way
this dudes playing diddy in the gym. what the fuck
January 22, 2026 at 1:58 PM
this dudes playing diddy in the gym. what the fuck
nobody needs me irl or on bsky to tell them shit is really fucking bad. ive been screaming about this nazi fucking system for 10 years im so fucking over it. if you really think goober the profile who has mtg with a huge fucking mouth needs to tell you ICE is bad im surprised you know how to log in
January 22, 2026 at 4:49 AM
nobody needs me irl or on bsky to tell them shit is really fucking bad. ive been screaming about this nazi fucking system for 10 years im so fucking over it. if you really think goober the profile who has mtg with a huge fucking mouth needs to tell you ICE is bad im surprised you know how to log in
one thing about me is that i really fucking hate it when it snows and i got jeans on and the bottom of my god damnned jeans are FUCKED SOAKED. it makes me sick
January 22, 2026 at 2:58 AM
one thing about me is that i really fucking hate it when it snows and i got jeans on and the bottom of my god damnned jeans are FUCKED SOAKED. it makes me sick
if you dont think shitposting is a form of art please unfollow me and shove a hammer up your asshole dickhead
January 21, 2026 at 5:29 PM
if you dont think shitposting is a form of art please unfollow me and shove a hammer up your asshole dickhead
you arent high enough level to smoke a juul. its level 86 stealth. if you drop that fucker in the bed it's basically fell into hell forever
January 21, 2026 at 8:01 AM
you arent high enough level to smoke a juul. its level 86 stealth. if you drop that fucker in the bed it's basically fell into hell forever
regretting writing all these fucking love songs about a person i hate now. literally nobody likes the NEW SHIT they want the old shitty love songs about a person who cannibalized my heart like it was a heart shaped corn dog
January 20, 2026 at 6:48 PM
regretting writing all these fucking love songs about a person i hate now. literally nobody likes the NEW SHIT they want the old shitty love songs about a person who cannibalized my heart like it was a heart shaped corn dog
looking for answers
January 20, 2026 at 3:06 AM
looking for answers
yall ever wonder like what the fuck is actually going on all the time
January 20, 2026 at 2:48 AM
yall ever wonder like what the fuck is actually going on all the time
im gay and communist
January 17, 2026 at 5:02 PM
im gay and communist
"what are you gonna do with your new found wealth?"
im going to fight with world hunger.
"brilliant, how do you plan to fight"
i dont man your british accent is stupid im just going to make sure people are more hungry than ever
im going to fight with world hunger.
"brilliant, how do you plan to fight"
i dont man your british accent is stupid im just going to make sure people are more hungry than ever
January 16, 2026 at 3:53 PM
"what are you gonna do with your new found wealth?"
im going to fight with world hunger.
"brilliant, how do you plan to fight"
i dont man your british accent is stupid im just going to make sure people are more hungry than ever
im going to fight with world hunger.
"brilliant, how do you plan to fight"
i dont man your british accent is stupid im just going to make sure people are more hungry than ever
"the worst she could say is no" actually dude she took a screenshot posted it to her 70k followers on instagram, gave them my address and they sent my cock pictures to everyone in my family. not good
January 16, 2026 at 3:03 PM
"the worst she could say is no" actually dude she took a screenshot posted it to her 70k followers on instagram, gave them my address and they sent my cock pictures to everyone in my family. not good
constantly ran through on bluesky. deflated. sloppy and floppy
January 16, 2026 at 2:52 PM
constantly ran through on bluesky. deflated. sloppy and floppy
literally never seen whole milk go away. its always available to buy at the store.
January 16, 2026 at 2:44 PM
literally never seen whole milk go away. its always available to buy at the store.
you all realize bluesky is my personal journal right and you're reading my personal shit? like im being so vulnerable. my asshole itchy today.
January 16, 2026 at 2:43 PM
you all realize bluesky is my personal journal right and you're reading my personal shit? like im being so vulnerable. my asshole itchy today.
i hate being a man but im not trans. like im this other thing
January 16, 2026 at 2:26 PM
i hate being a man but im not trans. like im this other thing
alright im gonna say it, ive always thought its weird that men are expected to open the car door for women or pump their gas like its assumed women cant do that shit. call me new fashioned but i dont think women are babies
January 16, 2026 at 2:22 PM
alright im gonna say it, ive always thought its weird that men are expected to open the car door for women or pump their gas like its assumed women cant do that shit. call me new fashioned but i dont think women are babies