Short Fuse
@fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social
Feral garden gnome and part-time shed goblin
He/They
Cranky and middle-aged
Meanjin
He/They
Cranky and middle-aged
Meanjin
Didn't realise how much my upper body strength had improved until we moved a wardrobe today. My god... I can *lift*.
January 15, 2026 at 1:12 AM
Didn't realise how much my upper body strength had improved until we moved a wardrobe today. My god... I can *lift*.
My new tat: It's the Celtic knot motif from my 1939 Singer 201k.
Because sewing machine 'tism.
Because sewing machine 'tism.
January 15, 2026 at 12:27 AM
My new tat: It's the Celtic knot motif from my 1939 Singer 201k.
Because sewing machine 'tism.
Because sewing machine 'tism.
Witnessed a crackhead brandishing a chainsaw at a cyclist while hanging out the front passenger window of a shitty old Hyundai Accent and it still doesn't crack the top 5 list of weirdest shit I've ever seen in my lifetime.
January 15, 2026 at 12:25 AM
Witnessed a crackhead brandishing a chainsaw at a cyclist while hanging out the front passenger window of a shitty old Hyundai Accent and it still doesn't crack the top 5 list of weirdest shit I've ever seen in my lifetime.
Reposted by Short Fuse
This clip should live by the Tom Holland Umbrella rule: you see it, you repost it.
this still slaps youtu.be/ZQ_MEFVx5jM?...
January 13, 2026 at 12:00 AM
This clip should live by the Tom Holland Umbrella rule: you see it, you repost it.
Reposted by Short Fuse
Ice commits an act of domestic terrorism against ICE.
It's funny 🤣
It's funny 🤣
January 11, 2026 at 7:56 PM
Ice commits an act of domestic terrorism against ICE.
It's funny 🤣
It's funny 🤣
Pray for my first-born. They're interstate meeting their partner's family and have wandered into a previously undiscovered circle of hell.
January 12, 2026 at 9:35 AM
Pray for my first-born. They're interstate meeting their partner's family and have wandered into a previously undiscovered circle of hell.
One step closer to getting my 29k up and running again... The needle bar drive arm has been straightened and is back from the shop. My engineering guy is a legend who did it didn't charge me anything so I'm buying him a pack of beer as a thank-you gift instead.
January 12, 2026 at 5:33 AM
One step closer to getting my 29k up and running again... The needle bar drive arm has been straightened and is back from the shop. My engineering guy is a legend who did it didn't charge me anything so I'm buying him a pack of beer as a thank-you gift instead.
Greetings from Down Under
ƎƆI ʞƆ∩Ⅎ
ƎƆI ʞƆ∩Ⅎ
January 10, 2026 at 12:32 AM
Greetings from Down Under
ƎƆI ʞƆ∩Ⅎ
ƎƆI ʞƆ∩Ⅎ
Celeb spotting: Jerry from Gardening Australia just pulled into the parking spot next to me at the supermarket. Managed to play it cool and pretend I didn't notice him.
January 10, 2026 at 12:24 AM
Celeb spotting: Jerry from Gardening Australia just pulled into the parking spot next to me at the supermarket. Managed to play it cool and pretend I didn't notice him.
Discovered that flipping the bird triggers the camera on the other half's phone. So many possibilities...
January 9, 2026 at 4:55 AM
Discovered that flipping the bird triggers the camera on the other half's phone. So many possibilities...
Celebrating 25 years married to the love of my life with a holiday on a beautiful island 45 minutes from the mainland. Posting this from the one spot with a semi-reliable 4g signal.
Bliss.
Bliss.
January 6, 2026 at 4:59 AM
Celebrating 25 years married to the love of my life with a holiday on a beautiful island 45 minutes from the mainland. Posting this from the one spot with a semi-reliable 4g signal.
Bliss.
Bliss.
And of *course* the Liberal National Party are supporting Trump's actions in Venezuela like the Tory scum they are
January 5, 2026 at 6:45 AM
And of *course* the Liberal National Party are supporting Trump's actions in Venezuela like the Tory scum they are
Reposted by Short Fuse
My ability to accidentally scare the shit out of people just by quietly vibing on the couch claimed another victim this morning. Bade good morning to one of Mr 16's mates and he jumped out of his skin
January 4, 2026 at 8:09 AM
My ability to accidentally scare the shit out of people just by quietly vibing on the couch claimed another victim this morning. Bade good morning to one of Mr 16's mates and he jumped out of his skin
Reposted by Short Fuse
Found me something at the farmers market 🤩
January 3, 2026 at 7:07 PM
Found me something at the farmers market 🤩
Me: *grumbles about my arthritic toes playing up
The Man Flesh: you could always cut them off
Me: JESUS BLACKBEARD, CALM TF DOWN
The Man Flesh: you could always cut them off
Me: JESUS BLACKBEARD, CALM TF DOWN
January 2, 2026 at 2:11 AM
Me: *grumbles about my arthritic toes playing up
The Man Flesh: you could always cut them off
Me: JESUS BLACKBEARD, CALM TF DOWN
The Man Flesh: you could always cut them off
Me: JESUS BLACKBEARD, CALM TF DOWN
Did a 5km walk with The Man Flesh at dusk. It was magical.
January 1, 2026 at 11:18 PM
Did a 5km walk with The Man Flesh at dusk. It was magical.
ISTG this fucking kid
January 1, 2026 at 2:19 AM
ISTG this fucking kid
Dear retailers: stacking merch low to the floor right in front of the counter for customers with little to no peripheral vision to trip over when they turn to leave is a terrible, terrible idea; doubly so when said merchandise's packaging is the same sad beige colour as your floor tiles.
December 31, 2025 at 4:18 AM
Dear retailers: stacking merch low to the floor right in front of the counter for customers with little to no peripheral vision to trip over when they turn to leave is a terrible, terrible idea; doubly so when said merchandise's packaging is the same sad beige colour as your floor tiles.
Guess it's time to get a new photo ID- I now look nothing like the middle-aged soccer mum on my driver's licence from 2023 and it finally caused some minor issues for me today.
It's a good feeling.
It's a good feeling.
December 31, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Guess it's time to get a new photo ID- I now look nothing like the middle-aged soccer mum on my driver's licence from 2023 and it finally caused some minor issues for me today.
It's a good feeling.
It's a good feeling.
Parody song idea: Hurt by Nine Inch Nails, but it's about being middle-aged and doing your back in while performing mundane tasks
December 27, 2025 at 3:06 AM
Parody song idea: Hurt by Nine Inch Nails, but it's about being middle-aged and doing your back in while performing mundane tasks
Merry Santaggeddon all... Australia's lowest underpass has claimed another victim, so your prezzies might be a little late
December 25, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Merry Santaggeddon all... Australia's lowest underpass has claimed another victim, so your prezzies might be a little late
Christmas mohawk courtesy of the first-born's mad hairdressing skills
December 23, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Christmas mohawk courtesy of the first-born's mad hairdressing skills
Was at the fish and chip shop at 6.30am to pick up a kilo of prawns for Christmas lunch
Grabbed the parcel and one of the pointy little fuckers stabbed me in the hand
(I don't even like seafood)
Grabbed the parcel and one of the pointy little fuckers stabbed me in the hand
(I don't even like seafood)
December 23, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Was at the fish and chip shop at 6.30am to pick up a kilo of prawns for Christmas lunch
Grabbed the parcel and one of the pointy little fuckers stabbed me in the hand
(I don't even like seafood)
Grabbed the parcel and one of the pointy little fuckers stabbed me in the hand
(I don't even like seafood)
Mother FUCKER
Just got Whammed in the supermarket D:
Just got Whammed in the supermarket D:
December 22, 2025 at 9:08 AM
Mother FUCKER
Just got Whammed in the supermarket D:
Just got Whammed in the supermarket D: