Florida Man
@floridaman.bsky.social
Chicken Soup for the Soulless.
#VisitFlorida
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#VisitFlorida
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I don't know how anyone has the bandwidth to give a shit about this Guthrie disappearance considering [gestures at everything].
February 16, 2026 at 2:18 AM
I don't know how anyone has the bandwidth to give a shit about this Guthrie disappearance considering [gestures at everything].
Oh, there's supposedly video of Dear Leader doing horrible things to children? Boy, it would be a shame if he claimed it was AI & the media gave him a pass & moved on to the next atrocity like him posting a fake picture of Biden fist-fucking a rabid squirrel.
Natural causes is our only hope, folks.
Natural causes is our only hope, folks.
February 16, 2026 at 2:13 AM
Oh, there's supposedly video of Dear Leader doing horrible things to children? Boy, it would be a shame if he claimed it was AI & the media gave him a pass & moved on to the next atrocity like him posting a fake picture of Biden fist-fucking a rabid squirrel.
Natural causes is our only hope, folks.
Natural causes is our only hope, folks.
I break my dry spaghetti in half. Fuck you.
February 16, 2026 at 12:49 AM
I break my dry spaghetti in half. Fuck you.
Holy fuck do I hate people.
February 15, 2026 at 10:48 PM
Holy fuck do I hate people.
Two days in a row I've watched refs use their down time to sit on the broken side of this bench. #VisitFlorida
February 15, 2026 at 10:45 PM
Two days in a row I've watched refs use their down time to sit on the broken side of this bench. #VisitFlorida
Reposted by Florida Man
Someone has sure already made this observation but the fact they can convert all those empty warehouses into prison camps means they could have converted them into housing, community centers, job training centers or, hell, libraries or schools all along. It’s always a matter of will not resources.
February 15, 2026 at 5:30 PM
Someone has sure already made this observation but the fact they can convert all those empty warehouses into prison camps means they could have converted them into housing, community centers, job training centers or, hell, libraries or schools all along. It’s always a matter of will not resources.
So sick of this motherfucker.
1/3 What Musk is really referring to here is, of course “race” - that construct that served to define the hierarchies of wealth & power structured by modern colonialism. Like other far right racists though, he uses the word “culture” as a seemingly less pernicious synonym.
February 15, 2026 at 6:50 PM
So sick of this motherfucker.
Reposted by Florida Man
Resistance infrastructure.
February 15, 2026 at 1:38 PM
Resistance infrastructure.
One of the greatest endings. One of the greatest sports films. One of the greatest 90s films.
There Goes My Hero | Varsity Blues Final Moments (4K)
YouTube video by Loving The 90's
youtu.be
February 15, 2026 at 4:42 AM
One of the greatest endings. One of the greatest sports films. One of the greatest 90s films.
Reposted by Florida Man
February 14, 2026 at 5:07 PM
Who the *fuck* is still eating plain old Corn Flakes?
February 14, 2026 at 6:25 AM
Who the *fuck* is still eating plain old Corn Flakes?
At a friend's surprise birthday party. Threw on a polo and jeans. I arrive and everyone's dressed up. Everyone I know here says "Cocktail attire" when we meet. No dress code is mentioned in the evite. I'm fucking MORTIFED.
February 14, 2026 at 12:57 AM
At a friend's surprise birthday party. Threw on a polo and jeans. I arrive and everyone's dressed up. Everyone I know here says "Cocktail attire" when we meet. No dress code is mentioned in the evite. I'm fucking MORTIFED.
Reposted by Florida Man
Straight up Nazi shit
On Thanksgiving, the immigrant children held at the Dilley detention center gathered in the gym for what they thought was a holiday feast.
The kids salivated over a spread of turkey, sandwiches, pastries and pies, a family told me.
But the food wasn’t for detainees — it was for the staff.
The kids salivated over a spread of turkey, sandwiches, pastries and pies, a family told me.
But the food wasn’t for detainees — it was for the staff.
February 13, 2026 at 8:17 PM
Straight up Nazi shit
Reposted by Florida Man
There are only about 1,000 billionaires in the US. We could get this done over Easter weekend if we wanted.
February 13, 2026 at 3:01 AM
There are only about 1,000 billionaires in the US. We could get this done over Easter weekend if we wanted.
RFK Jr. reminds me of that one time I accidentally saw my grandfather's balls.
February 13, 2026 at 2:51 AM
RFK Jr. reminds me of that one time I accidentally saw my grandfather's balls.
On tonight's episode of "TMI", they tore down an old cinema near me and, while it's long overdue, I'll always have fond memories of when I received oral sex during a screening of James and the Giant Peach (1996).
February 13, 2026 at 1:34 AM
On tonight's episode of "TMI", they tore down an old cinema near me and, while it's long overdue, I'll always have fond memories of when I received oral sex during a screening of James and the Giant Peach (1996).
Wife caught me in bed with her best friend. I told her how high the Dow was and she joined us.
February 13, 2026 at 1:20 AM
Wife caught me in bed with her best friend. I told her how high the Dow was and she joined us.
If you rearrange the letters in "Pam Bondi", you get CUNT.
February 13, 2026 at 12:23 AM
If you rearrange the letters in "Pam Bondi", you get CUNT.
Reposted by Florida Man
It’s not a withdrawal until ICE is abolished.
I have neighbors everywhere.
I have neighbors everywhere.
February 12, 2026 at 2:37 PM
It’s not a withdrawal until ICE is abolished.
I have neighbors everywhere.
I have neighbors everywhere.
Got pulled over doing 103mph in a school zone this morning. The cop drew his pistol on me and I told him the Dow was over 50,000. He let me off with a warning.
February 12, 2026 at 5:36 PM
Got pulled over doing 103mph in a school zone this morning. The cop drew his pistol on me and I told him the Dow was over 50,000. He let me off with a warning.
Wondering what horrors we'll discover tomorrow to distract from the Bondi disaster.
February 12, 2026 at 4:32 AM
Wondering what horrors we'll discover tomorrow to distract from the Bondi disaster.