Christopher Monks
@crmonks.bsky.social
Editor of McSweeney’s Internet Tendency. Author of The Ultimate Game Guide to Your Life. Dominator of waiting rooms. Fragile fan of the Dolphins, Sixers, and Red Sox.
Release the hounds.
Submissions to our humor & satire site have reopened. www.mcsweeneys.net/pages/guidel...
Guidelines for McSweeney’s Internet Tendency Submissions - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency
www.mcsweeneys.net
January 5, 2026 at 3:13 PM
Release the hounds.
They forgot to put quotes around “know.”
Venezuela’s ousted president, Nicolás Maduro, arrived in Brooklyn late Saturday to be held on drug and weapon charges, hours after President Trump said the U.S. had captured him and intended to “run the country.”
Here's what we know.
Here's what we know.
What We Know About the U.S. Operation in Venezuela and Maduro’s Capture
U.S. forces carried out an audacious raid on the country’s capital, seizing President Nicolás Maduro. President Trump said the United States now intends to “run” Venezuela.
nyti.ms
January 4, 2026 at 1:20 PM
They forgot to put quotes around “know.”
Reposted by Christopher Monks
NYT gonna NYT: "Both Mr. Mamdani and Mr. Maduro identify as socialists, though they have no relationship.” — would be funny if they did this every time you write about two capitalists.
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/03/w...
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/03/w...
Mamdani Called Trump to Criticize Venezuela Strikes
www.nytimes.com
January 3, 2026 at 10:01 PM
NYT gonna NYT: "Both Mr. Mamdani and Mr. Maduro identify as socialists, though they have no relationship.” — would be funny if they did this every time you write about two capitalists.
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/03/w...
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/03/w...
I take comfort in knowing that Schumer is probably writing the sternest of emails to the president right now.
January 3, 2026 at 1:51 PM
I take comfort in knowing that Schumer is probably writing the sternest of emails to the president right now.
We just wrapped up posting @mcsweeneys.net's most-read pieces of 2025. Thanks again to our contributors and readers this year. I like everything we publish, of course, but I’d like to point out some great pieces that didn't receive as much attention. #McSweeneysHiddenGems2025
December 31, 2025 at 7:36 PM
We just wrapped up posting @mcsweeneys.net's most-read pieces of 2025. Thanks again to our contributors and readers this year. I like everything we publish, of course, but I’d like to point out some great pieces that didn't receive as much attention. #McSweeneysHiddenGems2025
Been having a fun & relaxing vacation this week, but now, unfortunately, I must watch my Sixers.
December 31, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Been having a fun & relaxing vacation this week, but now, unfortunately, I must watch my Sixers.
When they make the movie about all the grifters, felons, and weirdos in the Trump admin, this guy will play himself.
December 31, 2025 at 12:35 AM
When they make the movie about all the grifters, felons, and weirdos in the Trump admin, this guy will play himself.
Reposted by Christopher Monks
Did you know that each region of Ireland has its own figure who traditionally delivers presents on Christmas Eve??
December 24, 2025 at 12:51 PM
Did you know that each region of Ireland has its own figure who traditionally delivers presents on Christmas Eve??
🎶🔔 "SILVER BELLS... SILVER BELLS... IT'S CHILL-OUT TIME FOR McSWEENEY'S..." 🔔 🎶
Submissions to our humor site are now closed. They will reopen Monday, January 5, 2026, at 10 a.m. Eastern. (Timely submission will reopen a day earlier on Jan 4 at 10 a.m. Eastern.) Happy Merry! 🎄🎅🎁
www.mcsweeneys.net/pages/guidel...
www.mcsweeneys.net/pages/guidel...
Guidelines for McSweeney’s Internet Tendency Submissions - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency
www.mcsweeneys.net
December 22, 2025 at 9:08 PM
🎶🔔 "SILVER BELLS... SILVER BELLS... IT'S CHILL-OUT TIME FOR McSWEENEY'S..." 🔔 🎶
Merry Christmas!
December 22, 2025 at 2:52 PM
Merry Christmas!
New life goal just dropped:
December 21, 2025 at 3:54 PM
New life goal just dropped:
“Hey, Department of Justice…”
WELKER: Why was this photo of a desk with a drawer open containing photos of Trump taken down?
BLANCHE: You can see in that photo there are photos of women. We learned there were concerns about them.
W: Are you saying those women are victims of Epstein?
B: No, that's not what I'm saying.
BLANCHE: You can see in that photo there are photos of women. We learned there were concerns about them.
W: Are you saying those women are victims of Epstein?
B: No, that's not what I'm saying.
December 21, 2025 at 2:55 PM
“Hey, Department of Justice…”
Can't wait for her Trump-Kennedy Center Honors induction.
www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/18/l...
www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/18/l...
She was caught on the Coldplay concert kiss-cam. Then came the public shaming. - The Boston Globe
Kristin Cabot, the woman that appeared on screen embracing her boss at a Coldplay concert, has come to believe that her silence no longer serves her.
www.bostonglobe.com
December 19, 2025 at 12:14 AM
Can't wait for her Trump-Kennedy Center Honors induction.
www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/18/l...
www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/18/l...
Either the teleprompter is going too fast or he is having a stroke.
December 18, 2025 at 2:11 AM
Either the teleprompter is going too fast or he is having a stroke.
Why is SNL on at 9 pm on a Wednesday?
December 18, 2025 at 2:05 AM
Why is SNL on at 9 pm on a Wednesday?
My name is Christoper Monks. I am not one of them. I wish to save the world.
December 12, 2025 at 11:16 PM
My name is Christoper Monks. I am not one of them. I wish to save the world.
Alex seems like QUITE the catch. www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/12/m...
Blind date: ‘When I asked him what he does for fun, he said he’s not an activities guy’ - The Boston Globe
Can good pizza help overcome half-baked conversation?
www.bostonglobe.com
December 12, 2025 at 2:27 PM
Alex seems like QUITE the catch. www.bostonglobe.com/2025/12/12/m...
Does he realize he looks old and frail, not important and in charge, when he sits at his desk with younger people (mostly men) hovering over him?
Q: Do you have specific AI guardrails you're trying to put together with China?
TRUMP: No. One of the things I talk to China about is the denuclearization of weapons
TRUMP: No. One of the things I talk to China about is the denuclearization of weapons
December 11, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Does he realize he looks old and frail, not important and in charge, when he sits at his desk with younger people (mostly men) hovering over him?
McSweeney's living legend, @mikelacher.bsky.social, returns to the site today with his first font-themed satire since "I'm Comic Sans, Asshole."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
Times New Roman Turns Right
“Secretary of State Marco Rubio called the Biden-era move to [Calibri] ‘wasteful,’ casting the return to Times New Roman as part of a push to stamp...
www.mcsweeneys.net
December 11, 2025 at 9:44 PM
McSweeney's living legend, @mikelacher.bsky.social, returns to the site today with his first font-themed satire since "I'm Comic Sans, Asshole."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
Mabel doing her best to dominate her vet’s waiting room.
December 10, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Mabel doing her best to dominate her vet’s waiting room.
We need either @showmanandydaly.bsky.social or @markproksch.bsky.social to play this guy.
Hassett: "AI is making it so there's a great coach for every worker. So instead of having to get the supervisor to explain why the machine isn't working right, you can Google or AI it or ChatGPT & it tells you how to do it right away & you become more productive & it saves the supervisor time"
December 9, 2025 at 9:41 PM
We need either @showmanandydaly.bsky.social or @markproksch.bsky.social to play this guy.
December 8, 2025 at 10:38 PM
Understand that you’re experimenting with a drone, but this is not a fun angle for us watching at home, @nbcsportsphiladelphia.com.
December 8, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Understand that you’re experimenting with a drone, but this is not a fun angle for us watching at home, @nbcsportsphiladelphia.com.
I’ll get back to you in a few, need more time to process this Village People performance at the World Cup Draw.
December 5, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I’ll get back to you in a few, need more time to process this Village People performance at the World Cup Draw.