House of 1000 Fionas
@cogentanalysis.bsky.social
oh god, it's come to this
Pinned
"EAR MUFFS WHEN IT'S 55°? HO HO, I WISH YOU LUCK ON MAKING IT TO SPRING," I boom as my shorts-clad body emerges, steaming, from the Rite Aid
Merry CRYPTS-MAS! (maniacal cackle as I pull a coffin lid down over my cubicle) (I'm still at work, I hate everyone who has ever lived their dream)
December 24, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Merry CRYPTS-MAS! (maniacal cackle as I pull a coffin lid down over my cubicle) (I'm still at work, I hate everyone who has ever lived their dream)
Jensen Ackles and Tim Robinson should play brothers, I am 100% correct on this
December 17, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Jensen Ackles and Tim Robinson should play brothers, I am 100% correct on this
Huh. I don't remember eating the mighty Mississippi
December 16, 2025 at 3:27 PM
Huh. I don't remember eating the mighty Mississippi
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
Doug "Skin" Flutie
December 10, 2025 at 6:57 AM
Doug "Skin" Flutie
Starting a cultural phenomenon by putting lol in quotation marks when the situation is not lol at all (it comes up a lot) ("lol")
December 3, 2025 at 12:10 AM
Starting a cultural phenomenon by putting lol in quotation marks when the situation is not lol at all (it comes up a lot) ("lol")
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
My main hobbies
October 22, 2025 at 4:35 AM
My main hobbies
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
I generally avoid threatening people with death or physical harm on here because it strikes me as a pretty unproductive and fucked up thing to do, with the notable exception of the sentient car Lightning McQueen from the Cars movies. who I will kill
November 12, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I generally avoid threatening people with death or physical harm on here because it strikes me as a pretty unproductive and fucked up thing to do, with the notable exception of the sentient car Lightning McQueen from the Cars movies. who I will kill
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
You know what this place needs: one of those guys pretending to be his own wife
March 1, 2024 at 10:43 PM
You know what this place needs: one of those guys pretending to be his own wife
(pointing at the trident hood ornament on a luxury vehicle) Ah, I see you got the new Hyundai Poseidon
November 10, 2025 at 12:47 AM
(pointing at the trident hood ornament on a luxury vehicle) Ah, I see you got the new Hyundai Poseidon
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
How pissed would you be if you were giving a smooch to a frog and it turned into a human man. Oh I gotta deal with this guy now
June 17, 2023 at 11:26 PM
How pissed would you be if you were giving a smooch to a frog and it turned into a human man. Oh I gotta deal with this guy now
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
ME: Jesus christ. The Chicken Man? When was this?
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: last night
ME: fuck.... well, at least his house is okay
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: *looks concerned*
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: last night
ME: fuck.... well, at least his house is okay
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: *looks concerned*
October 2, 2024 at 2:53 PM
ME: Jesus christ. The Chicken Man? When was this?
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: last night
ME: fuck.... well, at least his house is okay
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: *looks concerned*
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: last night
ME: fuck.... well, at least his house is okay
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: *looks concerned*
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
"EAR MUFFS WHEN IT'S 55°? HO HO, I WISH YOU LUCK ON MAKING IT TO SPRING," I boom as my shorts-clad body emerges, steaming, from the Rite Aid
October 16, 2024 at 10:18 PM
"EAR MUFFS WHEN IT'S 55°? HO HO, I WISH YOU LUCK ON MAKING IT TO SPRING," I boom as my shorts-clad body emerges, steaming, from the Rite Aid
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
HAPPY SHIT GARBAGE WEDNESDAY EVERYONE!!!
November 13, 2024 at 2:41 PM
HAPPY SHIT GARBAGE WEDNESDAY EVERYONE!!!
My main hobbies
October 22, 2025 at 4:35 AM
My main hobbies
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
just moved to a desolate and forbidding moor and honestly it’s really chill. I’d love to see this ever-present fog try to envelop me in madness
October 18, 2025 at 4:19 PM
just moved to a desolate and forbidding moor and honestly it’s really chill. I’d love to see this ever-present fog try to envelop me in madness
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
A fulfilling career is nice but the real dream is saying something profound before using your ultimate attack.
August 25, 2025 at 5:33 PM
A fulfilling career is nice but the real dream is saying something profound before using your ultimate attack.
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
"Tracy you can't fly anymore, remember?"
*cut to Tracy stood in a plane brandishing a box cutter. his expression is tense and angry but he is saying "If you do not all calm down I cannot teach you about knife safety" in Arabic*
*cut to Tracy stood in a plane brandishing a box cutter. his expression is tense and angry but he is saying "If you do not all calm down I cannot teach you about knife safety" in Arabic*
October 10, 2025 at 1:20 PM
"Tracy you can't fly anymore, remember?"
*cut to Tracy stood in a plane brandishing a box cutter. his expression is tense and angry but he is saying "If you do not all calm down I cannot teach you about knife safety" in Arabic*
*cut to Tracy stood in a plane brandishing a box cutter. his expression is tense and angry but he is saying "If you do not all calm down I cannot teach you about knife safety" in Arabic*
As I approach 40, I can't help but think about all the things I'll probably never get to accomplish in life. Like having a short story published, or learning how to fry scream 😔
October 10, 2025 at 2:34 AM
As I approach 40, I can't help but think about all the things I'll probably never get to accomplish in life. Like having a short story published, or learning how to fry scream 😔
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be the funny co-worker
October 9, 2025 at 6:04 AM
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be the funny co-worker
Reposted by House of 1000 Fionas
I can see the N¥T building from my cubicle, and it's very hard not to put sticky notes on the window spelling out a big "you suck so bad"
March 3, 2024 at 6:41 PM
I can see the N¥T building from my cubicle, and it's very hard not to put sticky notes on the window spelling out a big "you suck so bad"
I work at the plate-spinning plant. I work at the torture factory. I work at the combination plate-spinning plant and torture factory.
October 1, 2025 at 5:55 AM
I work at the plate-spinning plant. I work at the torture factory. I work at the combination plate-spinning plant and torture factory.
Another day, another (screams forever)
September 30, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Another day, another (screams forever)
Sumo:
Two men enter.
One man leaves.
That man loses.
Two men enter.
One man leaves.
That man loses.
September 28, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Sumo:
Two men enter.
One man leaves.
That man loses.
Two men enter.
One man leaves.
That man loses.