Christian Polanco
@chrispolanco.com
Stand-up Comedian
⚽️: @soccercooligans.com
⚽️: @soccercooligans.com
When I opened the app and saw BlueSky has drafts now 🥹
February 11, 2026 at 2:58 PM
When I opened the app and saw BlueSky has drafts now 🥹
When I was a kid, I naively thought racism would die out because the old people would be gone, and no one would be racist anymore. But it's clips like this that remind you that racism is a feature, and not a bug of this country.
Megyn Kelly just shouting “FOOTBALL IS OURS” at Piers Morgan about Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl show is the perfect example of this moment in time. Put it in a time capsule and send it out into space.
February 10, 2026 at 4:09 AM
When I was a kid, I naively thought racism would die out because the old people would be gone, and no one would be racist anymore. But it's clips like this that remind you that racism is a feature, and not a bug of this country.
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Exiting this Super Bowl party after Bad Bunny’s performance
February 9, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Exiting this Super Bowl party after Bad Bunny’s performance
Me after the first snap #SuperBowlLX
February 9, 2026 at 12:48 AM
Me after the first snap #SuperBowlLX
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Which is your preferred Bad Bunny Best XI? 🐰 @notalexis.bsky.social or @chrispolanco.com
February 7, 2026 at 1:30 AM
Which is your preferred Bad Bunny Best XI? 🐰 @notalexis.bsky.social or @chrispolanco.com
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Me on why I haven't left the house in 2 weeks.
February 3, 2026 at 8:45 PM
Me on why I haven't left the house in 2 weeks.
La voz! Honored to chat with @raecomm.bsky.social. It's like the video game was talking directly to me. 😅
Raise your hand if you hear Derek Rae's (@raecomm.bsky.social) voice more than your own family members. 🙋
February 3, 2026 at 8:31 PM
La voz! Honored to chat with @raecomm.bsky.social. It's like the video game was talking directly to me. 😅
Luther Vandross??
a man with a beard says now that 's a name i ve not heard in a long time
ALT: a man with a beard says now that 's a name i ve not heard in a long time
media.tenor.com
February 2, 2026 at 4:57 AM
Luther Vandross??
January 28, 2026 at 4:16 AM
Tom said, "I'm disgusted by ICE's behavior, so that's why I am voting to give them a fuck ton of money."
Rep. Tom Suozzi(D-NY), getting raked over the coals for his vote for more ICE funding, says in a campaign email that he didn’t understand what he was doing
January 26, 2026 at 10:16 PM
Tom said, "I'm disgusted by ICE's behavior, so that's why I am voting to give them a fuck ton of money."
Cops seeing federal agents shoot people in the street:
January 25, 2026 at 8:03 PM
Cops seeing federal agents shoot people in the street:
shame no longer exists
FIFA president Gianni Infantino announced U.S. President Donald Trump will co-present the 2026 FIFA World Cup championship trophy on July 19.
Trump to co-present FIFA World Cup trophy, FIFA president says
FIFA president Gianni Infantino announced U.S. President Donald Trump will co-present the 2026 FIFA World Cup championship trophy on July 19.
bit.ly
January 23, 2026 at 4:10 AM
shame no longer exists
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Life in Minnesota is terrifying right now, but every day I feel amazed by watching us wake up and go fuck with these absolute losers. Minnesota is going to annoy the regime to death and upon the graves of the fascists we'll erect a statue to Barb the librarian who ran dispatch.
Small thread.
I was driving up to @makwacoffee.bsky.social bc I knew Roseville (a suburb next to St Paul) was lousy w/ ICE. 1/2 mile away I drive past an ICE agent, so I flip around (following every traffic law) & enter a lot where there were 5-6 ICE vehicles & probably 8 observer cars.
I was driving up to @makwacoffee.bsky.social bc I knew Roseville (a suburb next to St Paul) was lousy w/ ICE. 1/2 mile away I drive past an ICE agent, so I flip around (following every traffic law) & enter a lot where there were 5-6 ICE vehicles & probably 8 observer cars.
January 21, 2026 at 3:01 PM
Life in Minnesota is terrifying right now, but every day I feel amazed by watching us wake up and go fuck with these absolute losers. Minnesota is going to annoy the regime to death and upon the graves of the fascists we'll erect a statue to Barb the librarian who ran dispatch.
"Make Heaven Crowded" is a bar tho
January 20, 2026 at 8:03 PM
"Make Heaven Crowded" is a bar tho
Not many better ways to spend a Sunday afternoon.
AFCON w/ @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social & The Cooligans. ⚽
Honored to be the hosts for the @mayor.nyc.gov #AFCON Final Watch party. They made a courthouse into a football house for one of the most dramatic games in soccer history. And it was entirely free to all attendees. Legendary. 🏛️
Honored to be the hosts for the @mayor.nyc.gov #AFCON Final Watch party. They made a courthouse into a football house for one of the most dramatic games in soccer history. And it was entirely free to all attendees. Legendary. 🏛️
January 20, 2026 at 3:38 AM
Not many better ways to spend a Sunday afternoon.
that mf under that mask
January 13, 2026 at 3:30 AM
that mf under that mask
Reposted by Christian Polanco
"It wasn't murder, and if you say it was murder we will kill you, which again will not be murder."
Homan: "We gotta stop the hateful rhetoric. Saying this officer is a murderer is dangerous. It's just ridiculous. It's gonna infuriate people more which means there's gonna be more incidents like this."
January 11, 2026 at 5:04 PM
"It wasn't murder, and if you say it was murder we will kill you, which again will not be murder."
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Sending lots of love to the Twin Cities and all of Minnesota right now. A place that has been so incredibly welcoming to us, by some of the kindest people on Earth. The soccer community in MN is like no other, and we stand in solidarity with all the people pushing back on this immense cruelty. ❤️
January 9, 2026 at 3:04 AM
Sending lots of love to the Twin Cities and all of Minnesota right now. A place that has been so incredibly welcoming to us, by some of the kindest people on Earth. The soccer community in MN is like no other, and we stand in solidarity with all the people pushing back on this immense cruelty. ❤️
this is what a dictatorship looks like
A Minneapolis driver was shot and killed by ICE officer during immigration-related operation.
DHS says it was a "vehicle ramming related" incident.
Mayor Jacob Frey says it did not appear that the vehicle was being weaponized against the agent. nbcnews.to/4qI7AiA
DHS says it was a "vehicle ramming related" incident.
Mayor Jacob Frey says it did not appear that the vehicle was being weaponized against the agent. nbcnews.to/4qI7AiA
January 7, 2026 at 10:28 PM
this is what a dictatorship looks like
Reposted by Christian Polanco
amazing how the entire machine can pivot within 24 hours. no need to slowly upsell the argument; just issue new marching orders
January 5, 2026 at 6:50 AM
amazing how the entire machine can pivot within 24 hours. no need to slowly upsell the argument; just issue new marching orders
Fun fact about me. When I was in junior high school, I went on a field trip to the prison where Nicolas Maduro is being detained.
January 4, 2026 at 4:06 AM
Fun fact about me. When I was in junior high school, I went on a field trip to the prison where Nicolas Maduro is being detained.
Not sure about you guys, but I expect a little bit more of the inaugural FIFA Peace Prize award winner than attacking a sovereign country in the middle of the night and kidnapping its sitting president. That’s just me tho.
January 3, 2026 at 4:23 PM
Not sure about you guys, but I expect a little bit more of the inaugural FIFA Peace Prize award winner than attacking a sovereign country in the middle of the night and kidnapping its sitting president. That’s just me tho.
Reposted by Christian Polanco
Yes we obviously asked Mayor @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social to create an NYC Soccer Czar position in his administration because we know two incredible candidates for the role. ⚽️🤴🏽🤴🏻
January 2, 2026 at 4:46 AM
Yes we obviously asked Mayor @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social to create an NYC Soccer Czar position in his administration because we know two incredible candidates for the role. ⚽️🤴🏽🤴🏻
Reposted by Christian Polanco
If Scott Jennings has no haters, we are dead. 😅
The Black List founder @franklinleonard.bsky.social on what it's like joining the panel on CNN.
The Black List founder @franklinleonard.bsky.social on what it's like joining the panel on CNN.
December 26, 2025 at 11:26 PM
If Scott Jennings has no haters, we are dead. 😅
The Black List founder @franklinleonard.bsky.social on what it's like joining the panel on CNN.
The Black List founder @franklinleonard.bsky.social on what it's like joining the panel on CNN.