Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
@carterforva.bsky.social
Easy to fuck, hard to kill
Pinned
DEVASTATING: Someone you hate from the internet got way hotter
This dude walked so Zohran could run
January 3, 2026 at 12:28 AM
This dude walked so Zohran could run
I was sworn in on a copy of the Virginia Workers Compensation Act.
Ok, everyone, what book is sacred enough to you to get sworn in on?
Strange takes on Mayor Zamdani swearing his oath on the Qu’ran. It has nothing to do with church & state. The point of the oath is for the person swearing in to do so upon some text that is sacred TO THEM. Some Presidents swore in w/o any book. John Quincy Adams was sworn on a law book. His choice.
January 2, 2026 at 2:13 AM
I was sworn in on a copy of the Virginia Workers Compensation Act.
Me on 12/31 every year: "this is great, why don't we eat turnip greens more often?"
Me cutting the stems out of the turnip greens on 1/1 every year: "fuck this fuck these goddamn leaves this isn't real food this is bullshit FUUUUUCK"
Me cutting the stems out of the turnip greens on 1/1 every year: "fuck this fuck these goddamn leaves this isn't real food this is bullshit FUUUUUCK"
January 1, 2026 at 9:38 PM
Me on 12/31 every year: "this is great, why don't we eat turnip greens more often?"
Me cutting the stems out of the turnip greens on 1/1 every year: "fuck this fuck these goddamn leaves this isn't real food this is bullshit FUUUUUCK"
Me cutting the stems out of the turnip greens on 1/1 every year: "fuck this fuck these goddamn leaves this isn't real food this is bullshit FUUUUUCK"
Boutta be way mo BBQ happenin
My married-in waymo relative says the company is prepared for operating in New Orleans during Mardi Gras because they've worked around events "like the Rose Bowl Parade"
Louisiana Rose Parade float is super cute to no surprise… just wish they had throws to really spice it up for the Cali folks 🤣
January 1, 2026 at 6:27 PM
Boutta be way mo BBQ happenin
Big high five to the first daycare employee that punches that weirdo with the camera.
Just beat the shit outta that guy. For the children.
Just beat the shit outta that guy. For the children.
January 1, 2026 at 5:44 PM
Big high five to the first daycare employee that punches that weirdo with the camera.
Just beat the shit outta that guy. For the children.
Just beat the shit outta that guy. For the children.
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Scrolling the bluesky timeline be like
January 1, 2026 at 4:57 PM
Scrolling the bluesky timeline be like
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
like 75% of dem messaging right now should be “the party led by epsteins best friend is breaking into pre-k childcare centers so they can record your toddlers and put the videos on internet”
uhhh yeah I can see why these childcare properties weren't eager to let in some rando dudes asking "where are the kids?"
January 1, 2026 at 2:49 PM
like 75% of dem messaging right now should be “the party led by epsteins best friend is breaking into pre-k childcare centers so they can record your toddlers and put the videos on internet”
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Today is the *first* day you can repost this...
January 1, 2026 at 4:32 PM
Today is the *first* day you can repost this...
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
West coast posters aren't better, they just have 3 hours to scrape all the good NYE posts and copy them for themselves
January 1, 2026 at 6:28 AM
West coast posters aren't better, they just have 3 hours to scrape all the good NYE posts and copy them for themselves
It is 2026, thus discrediting the invention of the Mountain Time Zone as illegitimate
January 1, 2026 at 6:06 AM
It is 2026, thus discrediting the invention of the Mountain Time Zone as illegitimate
2020 again let's fuckin GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
January 1, 2026 at 6:00 AM
2020 again let's fuckin GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
The correct order to watch the Jurassic Park movies is:
JW Rebirth
JW
JW Fallen Kingdom
JW Dominion
JP
JP2 Lost World
JP3
And yes that means going 7, 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3.
I will not be explaining.
JW Rebirth
JW
JW Fallen Kingdom
JW Dominion
JP
JP2 Lost World
JP3
And yes that means going 7, 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3.
I will not be explaining.
January 1, 2026 at 5:19 AM
The correct order to watch the Jurassic Park movies is:
JW Rebirth
JW
JW Fallen Kingdom
JW Dominion
JP
JP2 Lost World
JP3
And yes that means going 7, 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3.
I will not be explaining.
JW Rebirth
JW
JW Fallen Kingdom
JW Dominion
JP
JP2 Lost World
JP3
And yes that means going 7, 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3.
I will not be explaining.
"You'll have to drag me out of 2025 kicking and screaming!" - a central time zone guy at 11:10pm
January 1, 2026 at 5:11 AM
"You'll have to drag me out of 2025 kicking and screaming!" - a central time zone guy at 11:10pm
It appeared to me in a dream
January 1, 2026 at 4:27 AM
It appeared to me in a dream
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Hey remember a few years ago when we were rapidly eradicating types of influenza, and then Joe Biden was like "hey nevermind you can go cough on each other now it's cool also vote for me and I'll stop Trump and cure ca cer" and then he didn't stop Trump or cure cancer?
Flu season is off to a rough start this year, according to new CDC data. The virus is spreading faster than in previous years and the surge is likely to get worse. Here's what you need to know. n.pr/49yrLtt
Flu cases are surging and rates will likely get worse, new CDC data shows
Flu season is off to a rough start this year, according to new CDC data. The virus is spreading faster than in previous years and the surge is likely to get worse. Here's what you need to know.
n.pr
December 31, 2025 at 6:09 AM
Hey remember a few years ago when we were rapidly eradicating types of influenza, and then Joe Biden was like "hey nevermind you can go cough on each other now it's cool also vote for me and I'll stop Trump and cure ca cer" and then he didn't stop Trump or cure cancer?
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Our pop stars continue to be both more accountable and more responsive to feedback than the editorial board of the New York Times
Chappell Roan shares follow-up story after deleting Brigitte Bardot tribute post:
“Holy shit i did not know all that insane shit Ms. Bardot stood for obvs I do not condone this. very disappointing to learn.”
“Holy shit i did not know all that insane shit Ms. Bardot stood for obvs I do not condone this. very disappointing to learn.”
December 29, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Our pop stars continue to be both more accountable and more responsive to feedback than the editorial board of the New York Times
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Reposted by Lee 'the J is for J' Carter
Sucks because I really wanted one, but like... it was a damn near $100,000 minivan. It was never gonna work at that price.
December 28, 2025 at 12:02 AM
Sucks because I really wanted one, but like... it was a damn near $100,000 minivan. It was never gonna work at that price.
Holiday pro tip: cook a small, quick breakfast like scrambled eggs for the early risers. THEN cook the big complicated breakfast for the whole family.
The early birds get to eat like hobbits and have second breakfast, and nobody gets hangry while they wait.
The early birds get to eat like hobbits and have second breakfast, and nobody gets hangry while they wait.
December 25, 2025 at 4:56 PM
Holiday pro tip: cook a small, quick breakfast like scrambled eggs for the early risers. THEN cook the big complicated breakfast for the whole family.
The early birds get to eat like hobbits and have second breakfast, and nobody gets hangry while they wait.
The early birds get to eat like hobbits and have second breakfast, and nobody gets hangry while they wait.