OLD CRIED PANTS
@captainfartpants.bsky.social
Careless Discharge
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
red shirt death statistics
December 3, 2025 at 10:04 PM
red shirt death statistics
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
Authorities Abandon Search For Missing Girl After Finding Huge Bass While Dredging Lake
December 3, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Authorities Abandon Search For Missing Girl After Finding Huge Bass While Dredging Lake
@cirquedusirois.bsky.social I went to twitch last night, hit a break that I waited out, but wondered if they really did y'all a solid, or just shut down 75% of your outlets for a night. I didn't see it promoted on their front page, personally, and I was unwilling to get endless emails by logging on.
December 3, 2025 at 3:44 PM
@cirquedusirois.bsky.social I went to twitch last night, hit a break that I waited out, but wondered if they really did y'all a solid, or just shut down 75% of your outlets for a night. I didn't see it promoted on their front page, personally, and I was unwilling to get endless emails by logging on.
I need a toy drive that accepts non-new unwrapped toys.
December 3, 2025 at 3:28 PM
I need a toy drive that accepts non-new unwrapped toys.
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
BREAKING: We filed a class action lawsuit to stop all Texas public schools from displaying the Ten Commandments in their classrooms.
Judges have blocked our prior plaintiffs' schools from enforcing a Texas law mandating these unconstitutional displays. We're asking the courts to block it statewide.
Judges have blocked our prior plaintiffs' schools from enforcing a Texas law mandating these unconstitutional displays. We're asking the courts to block it statewide.
December 2, 2025 at 11:03 PM
BREAKING: We filed a class action lawsuit to stop all Texas public schools from displaying the Ten Commandments in their classrooms.
Judges have blocked our prior plaintiffs' schools from enforcing a Texas law mandating these unconstitutional displays. We're asking the courts to block it statewide.
Judges have blocked our prior plaintiffs' schools from enforcing a Texas law mandating these unconstitutional displays. We're asking the courts to block it statewide.
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
I am older than every dog
December 1, 2025 at 4:45 PM
I am older than every dog
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
can betazoids sense when you're stoned
December 2, 2025 at 9:58 PM
can betazoids sense when you're stoned
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
Crying Sounds Coming From Inside Suit Of Armor
December 2, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Crying Sounds Coming From Inside Suit Of Armor
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
"Is there anything worse than a funeral?"
Me: *pulling out my slide whistle* Let's find out.
Me: *pulling out my slide whistle* Let's find out.
December 2, 2025 at 7:32 PM
"Is there anything worse than a funeral?"
Me: *pulling out my slide whistle* Let's find out.
Me: *pulling out my slide whistle* Let's find out.
There is a huge influx of fake AI sunrise and sunset photos people are paying these days... I only present real AI slop.
December 2, 2025 at 7:10 PM
There is a huge influx of fake AI sunrise and sunset photos people are paying these days... I only present real AI slop.
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
HBOMax has started showing a 'remastered' 4K Mad Men and they’ve messed things up so during Roger’s oyster vomit scene you can now see the crew men with the vomit hose on the right
December 2, 2025 at 11:28 AM
HBOMax has started showing a 'remastered' 4K Mad Men and they’ve messed things up so during Roger’s oyster vomit scene you can now see the crew men with the vomit hose on the right
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
“When his jet arrived in Wildwood, NJ, Director Patel refused to disembark until someone procured an ‘FBI’ hat for him. Panicked agents found & bought one on the boardwalk, but then watched in horror as the Director did a press conference with ‘Federal Boob Inspector’ clearly visible on his hat.”
December 2, 2025 at 2:41 PM
“When his jet arrived in Wildwood, NJ, Director Patel refused to disembark until someone procured an ‘FBI’ hat for him. Panicked agents found & bought one on the boardwalk, but then watched in horror as the Director did a press conference with ‘Federal Boob Inspector’ clearly visible on his hat.”
I think that @juniormiller.bsky.social should have to tease and intro the 6:40 give up as "The Nascar CD".
December 2, 2025 at 12:44 PM
I think that @juniormiller.bsky.social should have to tease and intro the 6:40 give up as "The Nascar CD".
Will @gordonkeith.bsky.social call his friend Chris McKinley to perform Christmas songs before the musers break from December 12th - Superbowl Week?
December 1, 2025 at 5:18 PM
Will @gordonkeith.bsky.social call his friend Chris McKinley to perform Christmas songs before the musers break from December 12th - Superbowl Week?
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
"Fascists simply do not care about what is true. In a deep and fundamental way, it just doesn’t matter to them. You can see that even in how Musk set up his analogy. What he posted is not even the plot of The Lord of The Rings! It is the hobbits who ultimately save Gondor, not the other way around."
Even by a Strict Definition, Elon Musk Is a Fascist
He is weaponizing Tolkien to promote violence by ‘hard men’ against Asian immigrants
www.theunpopulist.net
December 1, 2025 at 3:45 PM
"Fascists simply do not care about what is true. In a deep and fundamental way, it just doesn’t matter to them. You can see that even in how Musk set up his analogy. What he posted is not even the plot of The Lord of The Rings! It is the hobbits who ultimately save Gondor, not the other way around."
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
Nature Begins Reclaiming Chuck Grassley
December 1, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Nature Begins Reclaiming Chuck Grassley
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
Se7en is a Christmas movie because people talk about the Bible and Brad Pitt gets a present at the end.
December 8, 2024 at 12:05 PM
Se7en is a Christmas movie because people talk about the Bible and Brad Pitt gets a present at the end.
Jim Nantz be bald as hell, y'all.
November 30, 2025 at 11:06 PM
Jim Nantz be bald as hell, y'all.
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
Restaurant Slammed Out Of Nowhere
Restaurant Slammed Out Of Nowhere
At Least 30 People Believed To Have Shown Up At Once
theonion.com
November 30, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Restaurant Slammed Out Of Nowhere
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
how to bbq ribs on warp core
November 30, 2025 at 7:40 PM
how to bbq ribs on warp core
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
42 Million Dead In Bloodiest Black Friday Weekend On Record https://theonion.com/42-million-dead-in-bloodiest-black-friday-weekend-on-re-1819574242/
November 30, 2025 at 8:00 PM
42 Million Dead In Bloodiest Black Friday Weekend On Record https://theonion.com/42-million-dead-in-bloodiest-black-friday-weekend-on-re-1819574242/
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
“When planning a meal, start with the protein first”
Ok well today we’re starting with the cheddar bay biscuit mix and working outward, bitch
Ok well today we’re starting with the cheddar bay biscuit mix and working outward, bitch
November 30, 2025 at 1:12 PM
“When planning a meal, start with the protein first”
Ok well today we’re starting with the cheddar bay biscuit mix and working outward, bitch
Ok well today we’re starting with the cheddar bay biscuit mix and working outward, bitch
Reposted by OLD CRIED PANTS
when did earth have to fight for the right to party
November 30, 2025 at 3:40 PM
when did earth have to fight for the right to party