Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts.bsky.social
Low Quality Facts written in arguably lower quality handwriting.
https://patreon.com/lowqualityfacts
https://patreon.com/lowqualityfacts
Reposted by Low Quality Facts
I am terribly sorry to interrupt your doomscrolling, but tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Kii the Kiwi. Look how adorable he is. It is absolutely monstrous that people chop kiwis up into little green spheres and sell them at grocery stores.
collabs.shop/ytep42
collabs.shop/ytep42
February 4, 2026 at 12:16 AM
I am terribly sorry to interrupt your doomscrolling, but tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Kii the Kiwi. Look how adorable he is. It is absolutely monstrous that people chop kiwis up into little green spheres and sell them at grocery stores.
collabs.shop/ytep42
collabs.shop/ytep42
Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Darth Maul Lightsaber, on sale for 40% off.
Originally, Star Wars Episode 1 was supposed to have a huge twist where Darth Maul turned out to be Jar Jar Binks with facepaint on. The creators scrapped this idea because they are cowards.
collabs.shop/8b0lbs
Originally, Star Wars Episode 1 was supposed to have a huge twist where Darth Maul turned out to be Jar Jar Binks with facepaint on. The creators scrapped this idea because they are cowards.
collabs.shop/8b0lbs
February 4, 2026 at 11:17 PM
Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Darth Maul Lightsaber, on sale for 40% off.
Originally, Star Wars Episode 1 was supposed to have a huge twist where Darth Maul turned out to be Jar Jar Binks with facepaint on. The creators scrapped this idea because they are cowards.
collabs.shop/8b0lbs
Originally, Star Wars Episode 1 was supposed to have a huge twist where Darth Maul turned out to be Jar Jar Binks with facepaint on. The creators scrapped this idea because they are cowards.
collabs.shop/8b0lbs
I love Hugh Jackman.
February 4, 2026 at 10:15 PM
I love Hugh Jackman.
Unfortunately I was laid off by the Washington Post today. It was my job to tell Jeff Bezos I think bald is better than hair anytime he came into the office. Please let me know if anywhere is hiring for this exact same position.
February 4, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Unfortunately I was laid off by the Washington Post today. It was my job to tell Jeff Bezos I think bald is better than hair anytime he came into the office. Please let me know if anywhere is hiring for this exact same position.
You don't apply to become a writer on Real Time with Bill Maher. You go on social media and post something like "Joke idea: Woke dodgeball. Not allowed to throw the ball." Bill will dm you in 5-7 business days saying "hahaha my guy. You're hired."
February 4, 2026 at 7:58 PM
You don't apply to become a writer on Real Time with Bill Maher. You go on social media and post something like "Joke idea: Woke dodgeball. Not allowed to throw the ball." Bill will dm you in 5-7 business days saying "hahaha my guy. You're hired."
Common advice: If you want to be successful, make sure to carefully proofread your emails and speak in a professional manner.
Every single email from the richest people on the planet:
"jeffrey.. Thank u for crzy party. Loved the hotdoggs. Lets talk biznss ideas. Maybe make monies tgthr???"
Every single email from the richest people on the planet:
"jeffrey.. Thank u for crzy party. Loved the hotdoggs. Lets talk biznss ideas. Maybe make monies tgthr???"
February 4, 2026 at 5:43 PM
Common advice: If you want to be successful, make sure to carefully proofread your emails and speak in a professional manner.
Every single email from the richest people on the planet:
"jeffrey.. Thank u for crzy party. Loved the hotdoggs. Lets talk biznss ideas. Maybe make monies tgthr???"
Every single email from the richest people on the planet:
"jeffrey.. Thank u for crzy party. Loved the hotdoggs. Lets talk biznss ideas. Maybe make monies tgthr???"
Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "Thanks For Loving Me Even Though I'm Trash" Sticker. If you ever feel unworthy of being loved because you're trash, just remember that means your partner is a weird freak who is attracted to trash. You deserve each other.
collabs.shop/vrbi3e
collabs.shop/vrbi3e
February 4, 2026 at 4:41 PM
Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "Thanks For Loving Me Even Though I'm Trash" Sticker. If you ever feel unworthy of being loved because you're trash, just remember that means your partner is a weird freak who is attracted to trash. You deserve each other.
collabs.shop/vrbi3e
collabs.shop/vrbi3e
I've experienced this.
February 4, 2026 at 3:39 PM
I've experienced this.
We're all using them wrong.
February 4, 2026 at 2:37 PM
We're all using them wrong.
Most history books fail to mention this.
February 4, 2026 at 1:26 PM
Most history books fail to mention this.
That's good to know.
February 4, 2026 at 5:30 AM
That's good to know.
I am terribly sorry to interrupt your doomscrolling, but tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Kii the Kiwi. Look how adorable he is. It is absolutely monstrous that people chop kiwis up into little green spheres and sell them at grocery stores.
collabs.shop/ytep42
collabs.shop/ytep42
February 4, 2026 at 12:16 AM
I am terribly sorry to interrupt your doomscrolling, but tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Kii the Kiwi. Look how adorable he is. It is absolutely monstrous that people chop kiwis up into little green spheres and sell them at grocery stores.
collabs.shop/ytep42
collabs.shop/ytep42
Never give up.
February 3, 2026 at 11:12 PM
Never give up.
That blows my mind.
February 3, 2026 at 9:22 PM
That blows my mind.
She means it too, I can see it in her eyes.
February 3, 2026 at 8:15 PM
She means it too, I can see it in her eyes.
I admire this greatly.
February 3, 2026 at 7:07 PM
I admire this greatly.
Melania ticket sales are so low that people still haven't realized its post credits scene finally introduces Mr. Sinister into the MCU.
February 3, 2026 at 5:56 PM
Melania ticket sales are so low that people still haven't realized its post credits scene finally introduces Mr. Sinister into the MCU.
Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Howdy Kitty Pin. Howdy Kitty was once again snubbed for Best Country Album at the Grammys. Howdy Kitty is seething with rage.
collabs.shop/osjomb
collabs.shop/osjomb
February 3, 2026 at 4:39 PM
Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Howdy Kitty Pin. Howdy Kitty was once again snubbed for Best Country Album at the Grammys. Howdy Kitty is seething with rage.
collabs.shop/osjomb
collabs.shop/osjomb
Nature is crazy.
February 3, 2026 at 3:37 PM
Nature is crazy.
It's one of life's greatest mysteries.
February 3, 2026 at 2:32 PM
It's one of life's greatest mysteries.
Safety first.
February 3, 2026 at 1:26 PM
Safety first.
I'm surprised that so many people don't know this.
February 3, 2026 at 10:33 AM
I'm surprised that so many people don't know this.
Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Algae Cooking Oil. Plankton has been relentless ever since I started cooking with this. Last night he almost stole the bottle by seducing me with a giant flounder robot.
collabs.shop/tfgjsw
collabs.shop/tfgjsw
February 2, 2026 at 11:46 PM
Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Algae Cooking Oil. Plankton has been relentless ever since I started cooking with this. Last night he almost stole the bottle by seducing me with a giant flounder robot.
collabs.shop/tfgjsw
collabs.shop/tfgjsw
I can't wait.
February 2, 2026 at 10:12 PM
I can't wait.