Joe Garland 🦋
@bsky.dad
TV comedy writer
EN/FR
J'aime Montréal
EN/FR
J'aime Montréal
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
erika: good morning charlie my husband
charlie:
charlie:
February 13, 2026 at 12:14 PM
erika: good morning charlie my husband
charlie:
charlie:
Don’t feed your three-year-old a ribeye steak for dinner because she WILL go to school the next day and tell the teachers she ate Rabbi Skunk
,
,
February 13, 2026 at 6:42 PM
Don’t feed your three-year-old a ribeye steak for dinner because she WILL go to school the next day and tell the teachers she ate Rabbi Skunk
,
,
here I wrote you a pwem
February 13, 2026 at 5:56 PM
here I wrote you a pwem
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
<---- calling it 'valentimes day' just to piss people off
February 13, 2026 at 5:46 PM
<---- calling it 'valentimes day' just to piss people off
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
college is about book learning, yes, but it is also about pound town and drug
February 13, 2026 at 12:23 PM
college is about book learning, yes, but it is also about pound town and drug
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
vote my guy in the primaries or you’re basically maga
February 13, 2026 at 1:59 PM
vote my guy in the primaries or you’re basically maga
college is about book learning, yes, but it is also about pound town and drug
February 13, 2026 at 12:23 PM
college is about book learning, yes, but it is also about pound town and drug
erika: good morning charlie my husband
charlie:
charlie:
February 13, 2026 at 12:14 PM
erika: good morning charlie my husband
charlie:
charlie:
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
I just spilled some milk and it was the FUCKIN G WORST! GOD DAMN IT
February 12, 2026 at 5:27 PM
I just spilled some milk and it was the FUCKIN G WORST! GOD DAMN IT
Finding these people hiding in a sewage pipe while fleeing in disguise, shooting them in the jaw during arrest, making them spend the night bleeding until a rushed morning military trial, guillotining them, hanging their corpses up in the town square, and shooting them again is the moderate position
February 13, 2026 at 2:17 AM
Finding these people hiding in a sewage pipe while fleeing in disguise, shooting them in the jaw during arrest, making them spend the night bleeding until a rushed morning military trial, guillotining them, hanging their corpses up in the town square, and shooting them again is the moderate position
AOC when spoken in French means “and also,” which reminds me of Lauren Boebert, who is also a brave woman congressman
February 13, 2026 at 1:56 AM
AOC when spoken in French means “and also,” which reminds me of Lauren Boebert, who is also a brave woman congressman
I just spilled some milk and it was the FUCKIN G WORST! GOD DAMN IT
February 12, 2026 at 5:27 PM
I just spilled some milk and it was the FUCKIN G WORST! GOD DAMN IT
I haven’t heard anyone mention reproductive rights recently. I’m still for them
February 12, 2026 at 4:56 PM
I haven’t heard anyone mention reproductive rights recently. I’m still for them
I’ve been reading up a little on President Trump lately and I gotta say, I’m not sure I like him
February 12, 2026 at 1:50 PM
I’ve been reading up a little on President Trump lately and I gotta say, I’m not sure I like him
I would also like to buy an opiate of the masses toy with company bucks from the treadwheel
February 12, 2026 at 1:46 PM
I would also like to buy an opiate of the masses toy with company bucks from the treadwheel
Having a hard time comprehending the horrors in American concentration camps that prisoners have communicated. Can someone explain this to me from the perspective of a white person?
February 12, 2026 at 12:45 PM
Having a hard time comprehending the horrors in American concentration camps that prisoners have communicated. Can someone explain this to me from the perspective of a white person?
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
Even if I accept the premise that AI is coming for all our jobs in the next decade, it isnt *the left* that needs to reckon with it. The left has spent decades endlessly advocating for a massive expansion of the social safety net. *The right* is the side whose only plan is "find a job or die, loser"
I understand why people are exhausted by AI hype, and why those of us squarely in the corner of "human dignity uber alles" see AI doomerism as self-serving hype, but I *really* think people on the left broadly need to start thinking seriously about the possibiltiy of the hype being...true.
February 12, 2026 at 7:39 AM
Even if I accept the premise that AI is coming for all our jobs in the next decade, it isnt *the left* that needs to reckon with it. The left has spent decades endlessly advocating for a massive expansion of the social safety net. *The right* is the side whose only plan is "find a job or die, loser"
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
Changed my voicemail greeting to breathing
February 11, 2026 at 12:03 PM
Changed my voicemail greeting to breathing
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
Me when the doctor sews the wrong hand back on: 🖕😑🖕
February 11, 2026 at 11:27 AM
Me when the doctor sews the wrong hand back on: 🖕😑🖕
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
a man bangs on my window, his hair and teeth falling out from acute radiation sickness. how does this help working americans afford eggs, i say, shaking my head
February 11, 2026 at 4:47 PM
a man bangs on my window, his hair and teeth falling out from acute radiation sickness. how does this help working americans afford eggs, i say, shaking my head
Reposted by Joe Garland 🦋
When I got the contract to write a history of concentration camps in 2014, I hoped to keep the US from ending up here. That didn't work out! But now it's critical to understand how much is already in process and the enormity of what's coming. The sooner we act to stop it, the more people we'll save.
Building the camps
The warehouseification of detention and initial thoughts on stopping it.
degenerateart.beehiiv.com
February 11, 2026 at 2:24 AM
When I got the contract to write a history of concentration camps in 2014, I hoped to keep the US from ending up here. That didn't work out! But now it's critical to understand how much is already in process and the enormity of what's coming. The sooner we act to stop it, the more people we'll save.
This whole bracket reminds me of the time I took my high school girlfriend to see City of Angels and she immediately dumped me
February 11, 2026 at 4:22 PM
This whole bracket reminds me of the time I took my high school girlfriend to see City of Angels and she immediately dumped me
Uninvited with a 7?? Yikes we’re gonna see some upsets
February 11, 2026 at 4:15 PM
Uninvited with a 7?? Yikes we’re gonna see some upsets
Brick is an insane 6 seed
February 11, 2026 at 4:13 PM
Brick is an insane 6 seed