Winston Niles Rumfoord
@astigmaticulous.bsky.social
Just a dude trying to find a replacement for my favourite hellscape.
When did every restaurant/cafe decide they have to have a "special sauce" and why is it always actually just Sriracha mayo? And why can no one listen to my request "please don't put any special sauce/Sriracha on my burger". It's actually not hard to NOT put something on a burger.
November 13, 2025 at 5:15 AM
When did every restaurant/cafe decide they have to have a "special sauce" and why is it always actually just Sriracha mayo? And why can no one listen to my request "please don't put any special sauce/Sriracha on my burger". It's actually not hard to NOT put something on a burger.
Call me old fashioned but I don't think the place we should try to save money is with the folks who put out literal fires and save lives daily.
November 12, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Call me old fashioned but I don't think the place we should try to save money is with the folks who put out literal fires and save lives daily.
Going against all my introverted instincts and setting up the club I know my oldest son needs to make some mates, and if I'm being honest I could use these kinda mates in my life too.
November 9, 2025 at 6:13 AM
Going against all my introverted instincts and setting up the club I know my oldest son needs to make some mates, and if I'm being honest I could use these kinda mates in my life too.
It is fucking wild to me that all my 7 year olds friends all have a Nintendo Switch and in most cases a PS4 or PS5. You might think he's talking bs to try and get the same from me, but I've met these kids and often seen the consoles during drop offs.
November 9, 2025 at 2:05 AM
It is fucking wild to me that all my 7 year olds friends all have a Nintendo Switch and in most cases a PS4 or PS5. You might think he's talking bs to try and get the same from me, but I've met these kids and often seen the consoles during drop offs.
This is cooked. Are we meant to feel sorry for a family with 8 mill in debt free homes, because the mum doesn't want to give up being a stay at home mum while her husband is the only earner and they are sending their kid to private school. I have no issue with people being wealthy but cry me a river
October 30, 2025 at 7:01 AM
This is cooked. Are we meant to feel sorry for a family with 8 mill in debt free homes, because the mum doesn't want to give up being a stay at home mum while her husband is the only earner and they are sending their kid to private school. I have no issue with people being wealthy but cry me a river
Lols what a mug this cunt is.
October 29, 2025 at 8:14 AM
Lols what a mug this cunt is.
Shout out to my 7yo sons teacher who set the class a homework project of saving $90 this school term to buy a toy they want, getting them to pick the toy online, telling them their parents would pay them to do chores and at no point telling the parents what she'd signed us up for...
October 26, 2025 at 11:35 PM
Shout out to my 7yo sons teacher who set the class a homework project of saving $90 this school term to buy a toy they want, getting them to pick the toy online, telling them their parents would pay them to do chores and at no point telling the parents what she'd signed us up for...
Hmmm why aren't job seekers uprooting their entire lives to move to NZs most expensive town with a notorious housing shortage to take a minimum wage job... only our best and brightest will be able to figure this out
October 21, 2025 at 8:38 AM
Hmmm why aren't job seekers uprooting their entire lives to move to NZs most expensive town with a notorious housing shortage to take a minimum wage job... only our best and brightest will be able to figure this out
Early father's day gift from the family since I'm away next weekend, and I do have some questions about whoever signed off this mug design
August 31, 2025 at 6:47 AM
Early father's day gift from the family since I'm away next weekend, and I do have some questions about whoever signed off this mug design
Reposted by Winston Niles Rumfoord
Old Soviet joke for today:
A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves.
After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?”
“I’m looking for the obituaries.”
“The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.”
“Not the one I’m looking for.”
A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves.
After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?”
“I’m looking for the obituaries.”
“The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.”
“Not the one I’m looking for.”
August 30, 2025 at 5:06 AM
Old Soviet joke for today:
A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves.
After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?”
“I’m looking for the obituaries.”
“The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.”
“Not the one I’m looking for.”
A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves.
After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?”
“I’m looking for the obituaries.”
“The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.”
“Not the one I’m looking for.”
Stephen Kings Harry Potter series.
No real joke there, I just wish JK Rowling lost her source of income.
No real joke there, I just wish JK Rowling lost her source of income.
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title:
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
August 28, 2025 at 5:09 AM
Stephen Kings Harry Potter series.
No real joke there, I just wish JK Rowling lost her source of income.
No real joke there, I just wish JK Rowling lost her source of income.
Stephen Kings everybody poops.
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title:
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
August 28, 2025 at 5:08 AM
Stephen Kings everybody poops.
Stephen Kings Horton hears a who!
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title:
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Stephen King's The Brave Little Toaster
Make a book better by adding Stephen King’s to the title
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
Stephen King’s The Hunt for Red October
August 28, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Stephen Kings Horton hears a who!
Holy shit, it just came to my attention that a new Plymouth boys high student wasn't able to perform his absolutely cooked speech in front of the school and all I can wonder is how insane his household must be. It reads like the manifesto left behind before someone goes postal.
August 28, 2025 at 4:43 AM
Holy shit, it just came to my attention that a new Plymouth boys high student wasn't able to perform his absolutely cooked speech in front of the school and all I can wonder is how insane his household must be. It reads like the manifesto left behind before someone goes postal.
Lols - imagine using chatgpt for legal advice. It does a semi OK job at helping me keep track of what I need to do and rewriting some blurbs for work stuff so they are a bit more succinct. I can't imagine trusting it for something that I normally pay a human $400 an hour to do.
Another reason that using chat GPT is worse than simply not having a lawyer. If opposing counsel finds out you've been using chat gpt, they can request your logs and find out everything you've been saying. You get bad advice *and* you are creating discoverable evidence that can be used against you.
August 21, 2025 at 7:09 AM
Lols - imagine using chatgpt for legal advice. It does a semi OK job at helping me keep track of what I need to do and rewriting some blurbs for work stuff so they are a bit more succinct. I can't imagine trusting it for something that I normally pay a human $400 an hour to do.
Just saw Brooke Van V at the airport. She walked past a cute child playing on the floor and smiled at them in a way that suggests she doesn't implement policies that will absolutely wreck that kids life one day. She must wear rose tinted contacts as I didn't see any glasses on her face.
August 21, 2025 at 7:05 AM
Just saw Brooke Van V at the airport. She walked past a cute child playing on the floor and smiled at them in a way that suggests she doesn't implement policies that will absolutely wreck that kids life one day. She must wear rose tinted contacts as I didn't see any glasses on her face.
"I'm sick of my tax dollars being wasted, it's great to finally have the adults in charge of the budget" Scream the partisan morons who are totally fine with the govt spending $671m on ferries that don't exist and never will. Really makes me happy about the IRD bills I get.
August 15, 2025 at 2:13 AM
"I'm sick of my tax dollars being wasted, it's great to finally have the adults in charge of the budget" Scream the partisan morons who are totally fine with the govt spending $671m on ferries that don't exist and never will. Really makes me happy about the IRD bills I get.
Trying to sell a car and some dude lowballed me, but wasn't a complete dick about it. So we had a back n forward and agreed on a price. Then he had the fucking audacity to come back and ask for $200 off because it would cost him money to collect it... sorry what mate? Fine, go buy something else.
August 12, 2025 at 6:27 AM
Trying to sell a car and some dude lowballed me, but wasn't a complete dick about it. So we had a back n forward and agreed on a price. Then he had the fucking audacity to come back and ask for $200 off because it would cost him money to collect it... sorry what mate? Fine, go buy something else.
Reposted by Winston Niles Rumfoord
Joey did a 180 so hard the Lolita Express had to re-calculate its flight path.
July 23, 2025 at 8:33 PM
Joey did a 180 so hard the Lolita Express had to re-calculate its flight path.
Here's a terrible fact. 3 out of 4 of Charlie Chaplins wives were teenagers when he met and started dating them. One of them he met at 8, and got pregnant at 15 while he was mid 30s. His 4th wife was 17 when they started dating and he was 53. Dude would've been best buds with Epstein.
July 7, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Here's a terrible fact. 3 out of 4 of Charlie Chaplins wives were teenagers when he met and started dating them. One of them he met at 8, and got pregnant at 15 while he was mid 30s. His 4th wife was 17 when they started dating and he was 53. Dude would've been best buds with Epstein.
What's the deal with burger places guarding their "secret burger sauce" like it's the location of the holy grail. Mother fuckers I just want to know if it has chilli in it or not because I'm a sensitive boy who can't be dealing with that.
July 7, 2025 at 8:35 AM
What's the deal with burger places guarding their "secret burger sauce" like it's the location of the holy grail. Mother fuckers I just want to know if it has chilli in it or not because I'm a sensitive boy who can't be dealing with that.
I wonder if Paddy realizes that:
1) billionaires will never like him no matter how much he sucks up
2) they dont want more billionaires because they are selfish fucks.
1) billionaires will never like him no matter how much he sucks up
2) they dont want more billionaires because they are selfish fucks.
July 1, 2025 at 9:58 PM
I wonder if Paddy realizes that:
1) billionaires will never like him no matter how much he sucks up
2) they dont want more billionaires because they are selfish fucks.
1) billionaires will never like him no matter how much he sucks up
2) they dont want more billionaires because they are selfish fucks.
Do some charities wonder why they don't get young folks volunteering? There is a specific one I was quite interested in joining, and they need volunteers. But they only want volunteers who can do garden work at 9am on Tuesdays, and the committee meets at 4pm every 2nd Tuesday..
June 26, 2025 at 11:40 PM
Do some charities wonder why they don't get young folks volunteering? There is a specific one I was quite interested in joining, and they need volunteers. But they only want volunteers who can do garden work at 9am on Tuesdays, and the committee meets at 4pm every 2nd Tuesday..
7 Year old had a school trip today. My wife took a cream doughnut along for him for morning tea as a bit of a treat. On 3 occasions today 2 boys in his class had to be spoken to because they were telling my boy that cream doughnuts will give him cancer. They also believe this about McDonalds....
June 17, 2025 at 11:06 AM
7 Year old had a school trip today. My wife took a cream doughnut along for him for morning tea as a bit of a treat. On 3 occasions today 2 boys in his class had to be spoken to because they were telling my boy that cream doughnuts will give him cancer. They also believe this about McDonalds....
Reposted by Winston Niles Rumfoord
Don’t send me an unsolicited picture of your peewee cocktapus unless you want me to…
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
June 15, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Don’t send me an unsolicited picture of your peewee cocktapus unless you want me to…
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.