Andy Parmo
@andyparmo.co.uk
The plural of sheep is sheeps.
Geordie in Middlesbrough. MD ANT.
Geordie in Middlesbrough. MD ANT.
Missus: would you ever apply to go on The Traitors?
Me: no chance. You have to eat your dinner off your knees and stay up until midnight every day
Me: no chance. You have to eat your dinner off your knees and stay up until midnight every day
January 2, 2026 at 9:38 PM
Missus: would you ever apply to go on The Traitors?
Me: no chance. You have to eat your dinner off your knees and stay up until midnight every day
Me: no chance. You have to eat your dinner off your knees and stay up until midnight every day
In undercarriage news, I have managed a clear fart. Repeat: a clear fart
January 2, 2026 at 8:23 PM
In undercarriage news, I have managed a clear fart. Repeat: a clear fart
This year’s really dragging isn’t it
January 2, 2026 at 8:02 PM
This year’s really dragging isn’t it
I’ve had nothing to eat since yesterday except three slices of toast because poorly. Maybe wuffing a giant tube of smarties as soon as I felt better wasn’t a good idea
January 2, 2026 at 2:08 PM
I’ve had nothing to eat since yesterday except three slices of toast because poorly. Maybe wuffing a giant tube of smarties as soon as I felt better wasn’t a good idea
Reposted by Andy Parmo
Attempted to fart. Foolish
January 1, 2026 at 6:31 PM
Attempted to fart. Foolish
January 1, 2026 at 3:56 PM
Over the last few days, the missus and nipper have both had the lurgy. I prided myself on not having succumbed to this lurgy.
But the lurgy was not finished with us. I have spent the past 12 hours yoffing and pissing rusty water out my hoop. What a start to 2026
But the lurgy was not finished with us. I have spent the past 12 hours yoffing and pissing rusty water out my hoop. What a start to 2026
January 1, 2026 at 2:29 PM
Over the last few days, the missus and nipper have both had the lurgy. I prided myself on not having succumbed to this lurgy.
But the lurgy was not finished with us. I have spent the past 12 hours yoffing and pissing rusty water out my hoop. What a start to 2026
But the lurgy was not finished with us. I have spent the past 12 hours yoffing and pissing rusty water out my hoop. What a start to 2026
Right. Moff to bed. Later, potater.
(10 points if you know where the gif is from)
(10 points if you know where the gif is from)
January 1, 2026 at 1:10 AM
Right. Moff to bed. Later, potater.
(10 points if you know where the gif is from)
(10 points if you know where the gif is from)
Am out walking the dog and hiccuping every 10 steps
January 1, 2026 at 12:52 AM
Am out walking the dog and hiccuping every 10 steps
LOOK AT MY FUCKING RED SHORS
December 31, 2025 at 11:40 PM
LOOK AT MY FUCKING RED SHORS
This is my view right now. CHOOOOOOON
December 31, 2025 at 10:29 PM
This is my view right now. CHOOOOOOON
Before the mobile networks all crash, you can all fuck off
December 31, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Before the mobile networks all crash, you can all fuck off
What was your biggest impact on the internet?
December 31, 2025 at 5:38 PM
What was your biggest impact on the internet?
I am on a bus. More news as we get it.
December 29, 2025 at 8:33 AM
I am on a bus. More news as we get it.
Reposted by Andy Parmo
Reposted by Andy Parmo
When I was a teenager on a freezing cold night I had a sneaky wank outside our house by where our bins were kept. A couple of hours later my dad was putting rubbish in the bin and slipped on my frozen jizz and done his back in.
December 28, 2025 at 9:43 AM
When I was a teenager on a freezing cold night I had a sneaky wank outside our house by where our bins were kept. A couple of hours later my dad was putting rubbish in the bin and slipped on my frozen jizz and done his back in.
Have they got rid of that fucking omaze house yet
December 28, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Have they got rid of that fucking omaze house yet
December 28, 2025 at 9:30 PM