Alan Hoffmann
@alanhoffmann.bsky.social
Professional English teacher. Dad. Coffee addict. Occasional writer. Chaotic reader. Turbulent advocate. He/His/Him
Pinned
Alan Hoffmann
@alanhoffmann.bsky.social
· Jan 15
Coke Zero: Exquisite. Ambrosia. The pinnacle of human innovation.
Pepsi Zero: Trash. An abomination. The Cybertruck of beverages.
Pepsi Zero: Trash. An abomination. The Cybertruck of beverages.
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
The Seahawks went undefeated after this happened.
Sam Darnold marked SAFE from “losing the locker room”
Ernest Jones IV marked FUCKING COOL
Ernest Jones IV marked FUCKING COOL
February 9, 2026 at 4:06 AM
The Seahawks went undefeated after this happened.
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Drew Lock, Super Bowl champion.
February 9, 2026 at 4:02 AM
Drew Lock, Super Bowl champion.
Next year, the Seahawks could win the Super Bowl on the Rams field.
February 9, 2026 at 3:43 AM
Next year, the Seahawks could win the Super Bowl on the Rams field.
We are lifting the Lombardi Trophy on San Francisco’s field.
They say haters never prosper, but I mean…this is the dream.
They say haters never prosper, but I mean…this is the dream.
February 9, 2026 at 3:31 AM
We are lifting the Lombardi Trophy on San Francisco’s field.
They say haters never prosper, but I mean…this is the dream.
They say haters never prosper, but I mean…this is the dream.
Great time for a ref show.
February 9, 2026 at 3:22 AM
Great time for a ref show.
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Niners
Niners
Rams
Patriots*
*in the Niners’ house
Niners
Rams
Patriots*
*in the Niners’ house
February 9, 2026 at 3:16 AM
Niners
Niners
Rams
Patriots*
*in the Niners’ house
Niners
Rams
Patriots*
*in the Niners’ house
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
When the ghost he’s seeing is yours
January 18, 2026 at 3:52 AM
When the ghost he’s seeing is yours
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
I would have thrown it deep after that holding call
February 9, 2026 at 3:15 AM
I would have thrown it deep after that holding call
Drake Maye now officially has thrown three touchdowns tonight.
February 9, 2026 at 3:14 AM
Drake Maye now officially has thrown three touchdowns tonight.
Called it at my house!
Stat change: last Seahawks TD is a pick-six now, not a forced fumble/fumble recovery.
February 9, 2026 at 3:10 AM
Called it at my house!
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Macbeth: SHIT
February 9, 2026 at 2:50 AM
Macbeth: SHIT
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Kraft is gonna have the saddest strip mall handjobs tonight
February 9, 2026 at 3:06 AM
Kraft is gonna have the saddest strip mall handjobs tonight
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Reposted by Alan Hoffmann
Okay how do I get to watch all my future games in Brazilian
February 9, 2026 at 3:03 AM
Okay how do I get to watch all my future games in Brazilian
WE’RE WINNING THE SUPER BOWL!!! KAW KAW MOTHER FUCKERS!
February 9, 2026 at 3:02 AM
WE’RE WINNING THE SUPER BOWL!!! KAW KAW MOTHER FUCKERS!
Collinsworth: Drake Maye is starting to feel it!
Drake Maye: /throws an interception to a wide open Julian Love
Drake Maye: /throws an interception to a wide open Julian Love
February 9, 2026 at 2:51 AM
Collinsworth: Drake Maye is starting to feel it!
Drake Maye: /throws an interception to a wide open Julian Love
Drake Maye: /throws an interception to a wide open Julian Love
THE CHEATHAWKS RIDE AGAIN!!!
February 9, 2026 at 2:34 AM
THE CHEATHAWKS RIDE AGAIN!!!
AJ Barner sneaking is as an MVP candidate.
February 9, 2026 at 2:31 AM
AJ Barner sneaking is as an MVP candidate.
The NFL should do a recount of the Coach of the Year voting.
February 9, 2026 at 2:22 AM
The NFL should do a recount of the Coach of the Year voting.
Finally a turnover!!!
February 9, 2026 at 2:21 AM
Finally a turnover!!!
Drake Maye is seeing ghosts.
February 9, 2026 at 2:11 AM
Drake Maye is seeing ghosts.