Wish I had the same dedication as those people who comment “train to airport” under every post about the Melbourne Metro

Shame about those ice hockey players getting lead poisoning from their cup

There is a holdout of coffee rebels, who resist the mainstream media’s overwhelming claims that you can find Yarraville’s best cofffee here

every time i go to karaoke i tell myself ok. you are not a good singer. no need to be a hero. and then one and a half beers in im like “i am gonna do Video Games by Lana Del Rey so good i end war”

Giving myself dysphoria from wanting to send a girl a Radiohead song

I made out with a guy who had the same name as me and he kept asking if it was weird that we had the same name.

Anyway can you do an ASMR where you just ask if this is weird over and over again thanks

Oscar nominee for Best Picture, Barbie, has been totally snubbed. The disrespect given to Oscar nominee for Best Adapted Screenplay, Barbie, shows how out of touch the Academy, nominator of Barbie for Best Costume Design & Production Design, is with the film consuming public.

Need a girl who will make me wear a dog collar with a little whiskey barrel those Saint Bernard rescue dogs wear.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that a large percentage of the criticism directed at university admin and the political establishment come from humanities graduates and that uni admin and politicians consistently target the humanities

Someone tagged me into this as, in Drach's absence, the person on BlueSky most likely to know (without guessing) how navies handled cat poo. I am VERY offended.

But they're also right. 😆 Indeed Drach/Dr Alex and I were comparing notes on this back in November.

So thread: How cats shat on ships /1

She was taking a while to get into a car, and apologised for being as slow as “mating elephants”

Nan is down, gonna have to catalogue what she’s been saying.

Stressing more about the custard I made for tomorrow than about any assignment I’ve ever done

Posting to escape ineptitude at sudoko ⬎
⬑ Sudoko to escape ineptitude at posting

Please don’t reassure that I’m not an idiot. The self-deprecation isn’t a coping mechanism, it’s the only thing containing the hubris and arrogance

Every few months I retake an online “are you gay?” quiz just to make sure I can still say the F-slur

Wish you were here rn but not because of romantic reasons, I need help putting this bandage on my thumb the scissors aren’t cutting it

After fleeing film Twitter which is increasingly filled with Dark Knight film bros, I’m drawing a line in the sand.

I don’t wanna hear about your favourites movies if you don’t have a favourite romance movie.

Watch movies about the human experience, I beg.

Imagine all the thing I can post now that my dad doesn't follow me