@vangoghsbigtoe.bsky.social
I had a stalker once, but then they saw me eat soup 🇨🇦 🇨🇦 🇨🇦 🇨🇦 🇨🇦
I had one job to do and its done ✅
Tree is up
One step closer to Christmas 🎅🏼
JOY!!
Tree is up
One step closer to Christmas 🎅🏼
JOY!!
December 2, 2025 at 1:31 AM
I had one job to do and its done ✅
Tree is up
One step closer to Christmas 🎅🏼
JOY!!
Tree is up
One step closer to Christmas 🎅🏼
JOY!!
Judging by all these reality TV shows, millions of people will do anything to get on TV. I've decided to start casting for my new TV show :
“So You Think You Can Shovel My Driveway, Canada”
“So You Think You Can Shovel My Driveway, Canada”
December 1, 2025 at 2:55 PM
Judging by all these reality TV shows, millions of people will do anything to get on TV. I've decided to start casting for my new TV show :
“So You Think You Can Shovel My Driveway, Canada”
“So You Think You Can Shovel My Driveway, Canada”
Can’t wait to see it when it’s done
November 26, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Can’t wait to see it when it’s done
Fack!!!
Bad spot to stand when taking this pic
Bad spot to stand when taking this pic
November 26, 2025 at 11:46 AM
Fack!!!
Bad spot to stand when taking this pic
Bad spot to stand when taking this pic
But you’re still coming to work, right?
November 25, 2025 at 10:41 PM
But you’re still coming to work, right?
You too can have that stylish Trump hair, all you need is a 1kg jar of peanut butter. If done properly, you’ll have enough left over for lunch.
November 24, 2025 at 5:54 PM
You too can have that stylish Trump hair, all you need is a 1kg jar of peanut butter. If done properly, you’ll have enough left over for lunch.
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already: Mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
There's vomit on his sweater already: Mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
November 23, 2025 at 5:49 AM
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already: Mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
There's vomit on his sweater already: Mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
*hand touches hot stove*
MY BRAIN: “GET IT OFF NOW NOW!!!”
*mouth eats hot food*
MY BRAIN: “CHEW FASTER. BALANCE IT ON YOUR TEETH, JUGGLE IT WITH YOUR TONGUE. WAVE YOUR HANDS IN FRONT OF YOUR MOUTH, DON'T SPIT IT OUT!! DON’T BE QUITTER !!!”
🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
MY BRAIN: “GET IT OFF NOW NOW!!!”
*mouth eats hot food*
MY BRAIN: “CHEW FASTER. BALANCE IT ON YOUR TEETH, JUGGLE IT WITH YOUR TONGUE. WAVE YOUR HANDS IN FRONT OF YOUR MOUTH, DON'T SPIT IT OUT!! DON’T BE QUITTER !!!”
🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
November 23, 2025 at 1:26 AM
*hand touches hot stove*
MY BRAIN: “GET IT OFF NOW NOW!!!”
*mouth eats hot food*
MY BRAIN: “CHEW FASTER. BALANCE IT ON YOUR TEETH, JUGGLE IT WITH YOUR TONGUE. WAVE YOUR HANDS IN FRONT OF YOUR MOUTH, DON'T SPIT IT OUT!! DON’T BE QUITTER !!!”
🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
MY BRAIN: “GET IT OFF NOW NOW!!!”
*mouth eats hot food*
MY BRAIN: “CHEW FASTER. BALANCE IT ON YOUR TEETH, JUGGLE IT WITH YOUR TONGUE. WAVE YOUR HANDS IN FRONT OF YOUR MOUTH, DON'T SPIT IT OUT!! DON’T BE QUITTER !!!”
🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
I always feel a little sad for the guy who misses a belt loop on his pants.
November 21, 2025 at 8:32 PM
I always feel a little sad for the guy who misses a belt loop on his pants.
Ronaldo might be the best footballer ever, but the legacy he’s leaving with at the end of his career, is being a performing monkey for Saudi blood money
November 21, 2025 at 3:15 AM
Ronaldo might be the best footballer ever, but the legacy he’s leaving with at the end of his career, is being a performing monkey for Saudi blood money
Record cancellations and dude thinks air travel will be like this again
November 20, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Record cancellations and dude thinks air travel will be like this again
Quiet Piggy!!
November 19, 2025 at 6:50 PM
Quiet Piggy!!
If you blacken out the teeth of Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson, they look like the two happiest Beach Hobos ever!
November 19, 2025 at 8:52 AM
If you blacken out the teeth of Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson, they look like the two happiest Beach Hobos ever!
and all this time I thought that they needed the room to pile the snow
November 16, 2025 at 11:00 PM
and all this time I thought that they needed the room to pile the snow
Art Tidbit:
“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone”
-Orson Welles
Art by, Andrés Colmenares
“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone”
-Orson Welles
Art by, Andrés Colmenares
November 3, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Art Tidbit:
“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone”
-Orson Welles
Art by, Andrés Colmenares
“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone”
-Orson Welles
Art by, Andrés Colmenares
We hardly had any kids come to the house,, weird !
#halloween
#halloween
October 31, 2025 at 11:28 PM
We hardly had any kids come to the house,, weird !
#halloween
#halloween
Blake Snell always looks like he just got pepper sprayed
#WorldSeries
#WorldSeries
October 31, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Blake Snell always looks like he just got pepper sprayed
#WorldSeries
#WorldSeries
If I was a witch, the first spell I would cast would be to make Ruby’s farts smell like Cinnabon’s. After that, I’d focus on evil shit. But first the fart/Cinnabon thing.
#dogs
#dogs
October 29, 2025 at 2:08 PM
If I was a witch, the first spell I would cast would be to make Ruby’s farts smell like Cinnabon’s. After that, I’d focus on evil shit. But first the fart/Cinnabon thing.
#dogs
#dogs
At this time of the year , I stand in the front yard, pointing to the trees, giving each autumn leaf that falls on my lawn, a stern disapproving look
October 28, 2025 at 1:57 PM
At this time of the year , I stand in the front yard, pointing to the trees, giving each autumn leaf that falls on my lawn, a stern disapproving look
