Yubi - Give a knave an inch, and he'll take an ell
@uzbadyubi.bsky.social
Textile Conservator. TTRPG creator, live-tweeter, they/them trans, ADHD/Tourettes. Views mine. No Nazis, Terfs, Tories. Accessibility NOW! Profilepic @freddeye
A small food interlude to say I WENT TO THE WALMART. I EXPERIENCED THE WALMART. I WAS HUGELY OVERWHELMED BY THE WALMART. I THINK I LOVED THE WALMART. I got so lost in it I couldn’t find the check out. It was the size of 2 1/2 Big Tescos. It was Incredible. 10/10 experience.
September 22, 2025 at 5:07 AM
A small food interlude to say I WENT TO THE WALMART. I EXPERIENCED THE WALMART. I WAS HUGELY OVERWHELMED BY THE WALMART. I THINK I LOVED THE WALMART. I got so lost in it I couldn’t find the check out. It was the size of 2 1/2 Big Tescos. It was Incredible. 10/10 experience.
I do not have a toaster, I have a microwave alas, but if I find honey ones I’ll try them!
September 22, 2025 at 4:58 AM
I do not have a toaster, I have a microwave alas, but if I find honey ones I’ll try them!
Teach me the ways
September 22, 2025 at 4:27 AM
Teach me the ways
Now this… this was Fucking Disgusting. I had high hopes, North America. I had dreams. American dreams. And these too crumbled into peanut buttery jelly dust. God these are gross. And no I didn’t eat a frozen one. Foul. Crimes. Heinous. A cruelty. Children love these?!? 0/10.
September 22, 2025 at 4:25 AM
Now this… this was Fucking Disgusting. I had high hopes, North America. I had dreams. American dreams. And these too crumbled into peanut buttery jelly dust. God these are gross. And no I didn’t eat a frozen one. Foul. Crimes. Heinous. A cruelty. Children love these?!? 0/10.
Breakfast yesterday was a stack of banana Nutella pancakes and hoo boy. Y’all are the kings of break-ssert. Desfast. It was so much. It was so sweet. It was so banana and so Nutella and I couldn’t finish it. 10/10.
September 22, 2025 at 4:12 AM
Breakfast yesterday was a stack of banana Nutella pancakes and hoo boy. Y’all are the kings of break-ssert. Desfast. It was so much. It was so sweet. It was so banana and so Nutella and I couldn’t finish it. 10/10.
Now this was a suggestion from a dear reader, and my god, these are GOOD. Well done Canada, applause all round. Crunchy, potato-y, genuinely savoury, but a difficult size to eat. One by one is too slow, but take a big handful and 20-30% of your hickory sticks will be down your top. 9/10.
September 22, 2025 at 3:40 AM
Now this was a suggestion from a dear reader, and my god, these are GOOD. Well done Canada, applause all round. Crunchy, potato-y, genuinely savoury, but a difficult size to eat. One by one is too slow, but take a big handful and 20-30% of your hickory sticks will be down your top. 9/10.
Onto some more snacks, me thinks.
I did not know which flavour was the original, so I went with strawberry.
This was a nightmare of sensation. So sticky as to have melded with the wrapper, so chemically and faux, I managed to somehow get it on like 3 things. This is a Ruiner of Days. 6/10.
I did not know which flavour was the original, so I went with strawberry.
This was a nightmare of sensation. So sticky as to have melded with the wrapper, so chemically and faux, I managed to somehow get it on like 3 things. This is a Ruiner of Days. 6/10.
September 21, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Onto some more snacks, me thinks.
I did not know which flavour was the original, so I went with strawberry.
This was a nightmare of sensation. So sticky as to have melded with the wrapper, so chemically and faux, I managed to somehow get it on like 3 things. This is a Ruiner of Days. 6/10.
I did not know which flavour was the original, so I went with strawberry.
This was a nightmare of sensation. So sticky as to have melded with the wrapper, so chemically and faux, I managed to somehow get it on like 3 things. This is a Ruiner of Days. 6/10.
Okay what is better about the other one because the mug one was SO bad I cannot imagine an improvement
September 21, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Okay what is better about the other one because the mug one was SO bad I cannot imagine an improvement
It was SO bad omg
September 21, 2025 at 1:07 AM
It was SO bad omg
My dessert and salad to a huge, lovely Vietnamese family celebrating a birthday.
The meat was good because there was so much of it, but idk if it was good bbq, you know?
8/10, you could feed an army on that meal and they’d still not finish it.
The meat was good because there was so much of it, but idk if it was good bbq, you know?
8/10, you could feed an army on that meal and they’d still not finish it.
September 21, 2025 at 1:06 AM
My dessert and salad to a huge, lovely Vietnamese family celebrating a birthday.
The meat was good because there was so much of it, but idk if it was good bbq, you know?
8/10, you could feed an army on that meal and they’d still not finish it.
The meat was good because there was so much of it, but idk if it was good bbq, you know?
8/10, you could feed an army on that meal and they’d still not finish it.
The buffet option was genuinely bonkers amount of food for $20. My ghast was flabbered, I was shooketh. Alas I have no banana for scale. This was a salad, various veg, two SLABS of beef, another slab of beef but a different cut, some ribs, all slathered in sauce, and a cake. I ended up giving away—
September 21, 2025 at 1:02 AM
The buffet option was genuinely bonkers amount of food for $20. My ghast was flabbered, I was shooketh. Alas I have no banana for scale. This was a salad, various veg, two SLABS of beef, another slab of beef but a different cut, some ribs, all slathered in sauce, and a cake. I ended up giving away—
There was that too!!!
September 21, 2025 at 12:22 AM
There was that too!!!
Lost our $5 immediately, but on the third we were up to $7 so we cashed out and took it to the cashier lady, who was sweetly bemused at our excitement over our ‘winnings’. It was a lot of fun but I could see myself on a bad day losing $$$ at a place like that. Also so different from UK casinos.
September 21, 2025 at 12:20 AM
Lost our $5 immediately, but on the third we were up to $7 so we cashed out and took it to the cashier lady, who was sweetly bemused at our excitement over our ‘winnings’. It was a lot of fun but I could see myself on a bad day losing $$$ at a place like that. Also so different from UK casinos.
On my return to Calgary my travel colleague and I decided to go to the casino and have the special bbq buffet option.
The casino was a garish fever dream. We went in with $15 in coins only to discover the machines only took notes, so we sheepishly changed them at the desk. On two machines we —
The casino was a garish fever dream. We went in with $15 in coins only to discover the machines only took notes, so we sheepishly changed them at the desk. On two machines we —
September 21, 2025 at 12:17 AM
On my return to Calgary my travel colleague and I decided to go to the casino and have the special bbq buffet option.
The casino was a garish fever dream. We went in with $15 in coins only to discover the machines only took notes, so we sheepishly changed them at the desk. On two machines we —
The casino was a garish fever dream. We went in with $15 in coins only to discover the machines only took notes, so we sheepishly changed them at the desk. On two machines we —
I was asked by a colleague to bring back Twizzlers, so of course I had to try one. I think I might need to set up a medical intervention for my colleague because this was one of the worst things I’ve ever put in my mouth. Smell of Febreeze. Texture of babybel wax. Taste of Regret and Death. 1/10.
September 21, 2025 at 12:14 AM
I was asked by a colleague to bring back Twizzlers, so of course I had to try one. I think I might need to set up a medical intervention for my colleague because this was one of the worst things I’ve ever put in my mouth. Smell of Febreeze. Texture of babybel wax. Taste of Regret and Death. 1/10.
Now this was a total novelty buy. Eau de Gatorade?!?! Gatorade water?!? Friends, I had to.
It tastes like someone had coconut water in a glass and then didn’t rinse it properly before pouring you some water in it. 8/10. Intriguing. A little lost, perhaps. Very interesting girth and size.
It tastes like someone had coconut water in a glass and then didn’t rinse it properly before pouring you some water in it. 8/10. Intriguing. A little lost, perhaps. Very interesting girth and size.
September 20, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Now this was a total novelty buy. Eau de Gatorade?!?! Gatorade water?!? Friends, I had to.
It tastes like someone had coconut water in a glass and then didn’t rinse it properly before pouring you some water in it. 8/10. Intriguing. A little lost, perhaps. Very interesting girth and size.
It tastes like someone had coconut water in a glass and then didn’t rinse it properly before pouring you some water in it. 8/10. Intriguing. A little lost, perhaps. Very interesting girth and size.
Lunch was with two friends so we went to the only veggie place in Banff, and it was DELISH. Tempura fried broccoli and mushroom pasta. 10/10 for each, no notes, except why the fuck did someone put strawberries on my pasta.
September 20, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Lunch was with two friends so we went to the only veggie place in Banff, and it was DELISH. Tempura fried broccoli and mushroom pasta. 10/10 for each, no notes, except why the fuck did someone put strawberries on my pasta.
Breakfast on Friday morning was again not Unique, but delish. A hot chocolate, a cheese and ham croissant (demolished) and a cinnamon roll.
10/10, 10/10, 9/10 respectively. There was a little too much frosting on the cinnamon roll for my tastes.
10/10, 10/10, 9/10 respectively. There was a little too much frosting on the cinnamon roll for my tastes.
September 20, 2025 at 7:30 PM
Breakfast on Friday morning was again not Unique, but delish. A hot chocolate, a cheese and ham croissant (demolished) and a cinnamon roll.
10/10, 10/10, 9/10 respectively. There was a little too much frosting on the cinnamon roll for my tastes.
10/10, 10/10, 9/10 respectively. There was a little too much frosting on the cinnamon roll for my tastes.
Also shout out to our server who kindly split our portion in two bowls because my friend is veggie and I didn’t want to get meat juice in her cheese, and who also kept our waters SO FILLED it became a running joke. 10/10 service, you guys are so friendly.
September 20, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Also shout out to our server who kindly split our portion in two bowls because my friend is veggie and I didn’t want to get meat juice in her cheese, and who also kept our waters SO FILLED it became a running joke. 10/10 service, you guys are so friendly.
Next was a meal I’m not sure is traditionally Canadian, but was prevalent in Banff.
Fondue! I had one with prime rib and a bunch of veggies. Fondue? More like FUNdue! Nothing funnier than watching your friend fighting for her life with cheesy broccoli while you recount childhood trauma. 10/10.
Fondue! I had one with prime rib and a bunch of veggies. Fondue? More like FUNdue! Nothing funnier than watching your friend fighting for her life with cheesy broccoli while you recount childhood trauma. 10/10.
September 20, 2025 at 7:21 PM
Next was a meal I’m not sure is traditionally Canadian, but was prevalent in Banff.
Fondue! I had one with prime rib and a bunch of veggies. Fondue? More like FUNdue! Nothing funnier than watching your friend fighting for her life with cheesy broccoli while you recount childhood trauma. 10/10.
Fondue! I had one with prime rib and a bunch of veggies. Fondue? More like FUNdue! Nothing funnier than watching your friend fighting for her life with cheesy broccoli while you recount childhood trauma. 10/10.
I was, however, extremely excited to use the TOP LOADER WASHING MACHINE and TIDE DETERGENT!!!
Genuinely exciting moment, washed me clothes good, 10/10.
Genuinely exciting moment, washed me clothes good, 10/10.
September 20, 2025 at 7:14 PM
I was, however, extremely excited to use the TOP LOADER WASHING MACHINE and TIDE DETERGENT!!!
Genuinely exciting moment, washed me clothes good, 10/10.
Genuinely exciting moment, washed me clothes good, 10/10.
I shall skip over Tuesday dinner, and all meals on Wednesday, and breakfast and lunch on Thursday because they were lovely but all included in the conference and were buffets without anything too exciting. Imagine a blur of soups, trout, and salads.
September 20, 2025 at 7:12 PM
I shall skip over Tuesday dinner, and all meals on Wednesday, and breakfast and lunch on Thursday because they were lovely but all included in the conference and were buffets without anything too exciting. Imagine a blur of soups, trout, and salads.
I was told I hadn’t had proper Chips Ahoy so with the help of my Puerto Rican friend, she pointed me to her favourite ones.
These were infinitely better than the mini ones. Crumbly without becoming an act of vandalism to the room you’re in, quite sweet, but friends… I’ve had these before. 7/10.
These were infinitely better than the mini ones. Crumbly without becoming an act of vandalism to the room you’re in, quite sweet, but friends… I’ve had these before. 7/10.
September 20, 2025 at 7:10 PM
I was told I hadn’t had proper Chips Ahoy so with the help of my Puerto Rican friend, she pointed me to her favourite ones.
These were infinitely better than the mini ones. Crumbly without becoming an act of vandalism to the room you’re in, quite sweet, but friends… I’ve had these before. 7/10.
These were infinitely better than the mini ones. Crumbly without becoming an act of vandalism to the room you’re in, quite sweet, but friends… I’ve had these before. 7/10.
Now I can’t remember is Dasani water is a good one or not, but friends, it was chilled water. In the UK we don’t really do bottled water but it was indeed just water. 9/10.
The Kool-Aid was GOOD. VERY sweet, and it did look like I was pouring blood in the water, which added fun. 9/10.
The Kool-Aid was GOOD. VERY sweet, and it did look like I was pouring blood in the water, which added fun. 9/10.
September 20, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Now I can’t remember is Dasani water is a good one or not, but friends, it was chilled water. In the UK we don’t really do bottled water but it was indeed just water. 9/10.
The Kool-Aid was GOOD. VERY sweet, and it did look like I was pouring blood in the water, which added fun. 9/10.
The Kool-Aid was GOOD. VERY sweet, and it did look like I was pouring blood in the water, which added fun. 9/10.
experiencing the greatness your continent of wonders contains, and I have been at least taking photos. So let’s resume, with a palate cleanser.
Dasani water and KoolAid.
Dasani water and KoolAid.
September 20, 2025 at 6:57 PM
experiencing the greatness your continent of wonders contains, and I have been at least taking photos. So let’s resume, with a palate cleanser.
Dasani water and KoolAid.
Dasani water and KoolAid.