Tori Martino
@torimartino.bsky.social
in love with don henley since 2003. green bay packers owner. storm spotter. pophead. my favorite scent is outboard motor exhaust. i’m with coco forever. she/her
there is so much college football on my bsky feed on saturdays. i am not a cfb girlie, so i understand none of it, but i am nonetheless entertained. sports is sports babey
November 22, 2025 at 11:02 PM
there is so much college football on my bsky feed on saturdays. i am not a cfb girlie, so i understand none of it, but i am nonetheless entertained. sports is sports babey
Reposted by Tori Martino
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
Reposted by Tori Martino
Reposted by Tori Martino
Zohran flip your hair again we need healthcare get him to give us healthcare.
November 21, 2025 at 9:26 PM
Zohran flip your hair again we need healthcare get him to give us healthcare.
Reposted by Tori Martino
my jaw is on the floor and yet im completely unsurprised. trump’s only political conviction is that he loves a handsome winner
A reporter asks if Mamdani stands by calling Trump a fascist. Mamdani starts to give a delicate answer.
Trump (smiles, pats Mamdani's arm): "That's OK, you can just say yes. It's easier. I don't mind."
Trump (smiles, pats Mamdani's arm): "That's OK, you can just say yes. It's easier. I don't mind."
November 21, 2025 at 8:58 PM
my jaw is on the floor and yet im completely unsurprised. trump’s only political conviction is that he loves a handsome winner
lol. lmao, even!
Whoops, The Onion has accidentally torn apart the Detroit Lions fanbase.
November 21, 2025 at 4:51 PM
lol. lmao, even!
non contact, yeeeesh
November 21, 2025 at 3:31 AM
non contact, yeeeesh
tonight's random thought: if we ever renovate the bathroom or add a second bathroom at my house, i need that bitch to have tiling reminiscent of the glazed brick doorways of the classrooms in my high school. oh my god. i've been in love with those things forever
November 21, 2025 at 3:13 AM
tonight's random thought: if we ever renovate the bathroom or add a second bathroom at my house, i need that bitch to have tiling reminiscent of the glazed brick doorways of the classrooms in my high school. oh my god. i've been in love with those things forever
opened the medicine cabinet to find a spider chilling right on my bottle of aleve. disgusting. spiders don't need nsaids, i do. fuck outta here
November 21, 2025 at 1:21 AM
opened the medicine cabinet to find a spider chilling right on my bottle of aleve. disgusting. spiders don't need nsaids, i do. fuck outta here
and what the fuck are you going to do about it? keep issuing statements? fucking cowards
November 20, 2025 at 5:45 PM
and what the fuck are you going to do about it? keep issuing statements? fucking cowards
bears fans don't like this because they hate rodgers and think he's a psycho. i (a packer fan) don't like this beacuse it's weak as shit and he should continue being a bears hater. and also because i think he's a psycho.
November 20, 2025 at 2:14 AM
bears fans don't like this because they hate rodgers and think he's a psycho. i (a packer fan) don't like this beacuse it's weak as shit and he should continue being a bears hater. and also because i think he's a psycho.
after getting a rare nosebleed at work today… finally made the seasonal switchover from fan to humidifier 😭
November 19, 2025 at 9:22 PM
after getting a rare nosebleed at work today… finally made the seasonal switchover from fan to humidifier 😭
pro strat: go home after eating thanksgiving lunch in the office so that you can be tired and full at home instead of in front of your coworkers
November 19, 2025 at 8:25 PM
pro strat: go home after eating thanksgiving lunch in the office so that you can be tired and full at home instead of in front of your coworkers
Reposted by Tori Martino
November 19, 2025 at 4:08 AM
thank god it’s the best day of the work year tomorrow: THANKSGIVING LUNCH
November 18, 2025 at 8:42 PM
thank god it’s the best day of the work year tomorrow: THANKSGIVING LUNCH
looks like i’ve got to get to the museum soon 😭
"This will be the Museum's final full year in this location before moving to its new home, the Nature & Culture Museum of Wisconsin."
Milwaukee Public Museum will officially close January 3, 2027
“This will be the Museum’s final full year in this location before moving to its new home, the Nature & Culture Museum of Wisconsin.”
milwaukeerecord.com
November 18, 2025 at 3:43 PM
looks like i’ve got to get to the museum soon 😭
i did not want to have to do sugar daddy math at 9 in the morning but here we fucking are!
Btw about this from Lizza's reply: Olivia and I lived together for 4+ years (4 b'days, 4 Xmases, 4 anniversaries). That's like $1250 of jewelry per celebration. And her apartment was a writing studio. And I made an f-ton then. What was I supposed to do? Get her a lot of Gift Certificates from Kmart?
November 18, 2025 at 3:09 PM
i did not want to have to do sugar daddy math at 9 in the morning but here we fucking are!
oh i am SO buying my dad an RC airplane for christmas
November 18, 2025 at 12:41 AM
oh i am SO buying my dad an RC airplane for christmas
tush push/false start discourse? yeah that’s my cue to go to bed yall have fun tho
November 17, 2025 at 3:18 AM
tush push/false start discourse? yeah that’s my cue to go to bed yall have fun tho
i have no object permanence when it comes to Food In My House lately so i definitely just had chips and queso for dinner tonight
God dammit it is once again time to decide what to eat
November 16, 2025 at 11:56 PM
i have no object permanence when it comes to Food In My House lately so i definitely just had chips and queso for dinner tonight
WE ACTUALLY HELD ONTO A PICK LMAOOOO THERE’S THE DAGGER
November 16, 2025 at 8:58 PM
WE ACTUALLY HELD ONTO A PICK LMAOOOO THERE’S THE DAGGER
i should have bought more watermelon hi-chews at hmart D:
November 16, 2025 at 8:24 PM
i should have bought more watermelon hi-chews at hmart D:
Reposted by Tori Martino
You are now also playing on defense, and the Packers might ask you to kick too.
After yet another injury, you are now playing on offense for the Green Bay Packers.
November 16, 2025 at 8:07 PM
You are now also playing on defense, and the Packers might ask you to kick too.
oh no. even the substitute teacher isn't the answer? shit
November 16, 2025 at 7:53 PM
oh no. even the substitute teacher isn't the answer? shit
white andrew quarless has the moves!
November 16, 2025 at 7:53 PM
white andrew quarless has the moves!