Once you’ve explored and benefited from the countless forms of socially acceptable exploitation, and you’ve found them all lacking, there are few more obvious redoubts than pedophilia.

Get ready to learn about Irene Cara or, as she was known in the intelligence community, “Irene-Contra.”

You've been warned.

You can't inhale keyboard cleaner anymore, because of woke.

I love The Ramones, but Johnny was a fucking Reaganite who spent decades antagonizing Joey, an introverted lefty who struggled with addiction and undiagnosed OCD, and Dee Dee recorded one of the worst fucking rap songs ever. Their output was cool; they, a bunch of weird-ass glue sniffers, were not.

My cat used to refuse to use the cat door and make me open the human door, at which point he’d run out. I liked to imagine I was opening the bullpen door for the closer.

I truly have no idea. The mind boggles.

Nuh-uh not me

Mom-entum: The Oedipus Complex & You
Mom-‘n’-Tums: Tummy Ache Solutions for Growing Boys

They also don’t want you to watch the Magic, because the Magic can’t make a jumper to save their lives.