The Grinch is saying, “roast beast is bussin.” And he’s doing the harlem shake as well.

Why is Angie from RHOSLC on my playing card... She measures her plans in centuries...

*noise from inhaling vape*

murderer: oh there he is

my artpop [sore throat] could mean anything

(hearing your life story) ok cool but where do i come in?

Worker: yes I have autism

Coworker: so you take things literally?

Worker: no that is Kleptomania

Can’t put my phone down

I do like how everyone on bluesky is talking about how much they love bluesky! It's almost like if we all keep talking about bluesky, we don't have to think about the awful world outside of bluesky!

"Maybe this app is finally the one I become good at posting on" - me every 3 or so years until I die probably

I can't believe the new Matlock with Kathy Bates is in a universe where the old Matlock show exists?!