Transparent prose, my man.

Yup, got him in the gourd.

And now for Spanberger to teach them to fear god, whenever she gets around to it. Oops! Scheming vizier is out of favor in a new court.

Equip Ahab with Blood-Quenched Spear. Equipped creature gains +3/-1, Menace, Haste, Vigilance, Lifelink, Reach, and Deathtouch.

When equipped creature deals damage or dies, it's controller sacrifices all creatures without flying.

Ooh. And Ward: Sacrifice two non-land permanents.

White Whale color identity is a real puzzler though. In-universe, whiteness is explicitly the obliterating void created by all colors. So, like, Devoid is probably keyworded on the big fella.

The White Whale is a functional reprint of Emrakul.

Elizabeth Bennet is Blue. 1/4.

ETB place two stun counters on target creature.

Pay 2U: place stun counter on target creature.

Tap, play 6W: gain control of target creature with stun counter on it.

Mr. Wickham, Charming Suitor is Red. 3/1 haste.

When Mr. Wickham attacks, gain control of target treasure token opponent controls.

If exiled, return from exile flipped.

//

Mr. Wickham, Disgraceful Suitor is Black. 5/2 haste deathtouch.

Mr. Wickham cannot be blocked unless opponent pays 3.

Mrs. Bennet is Red. Offspring 2. Haste. Sacrifice a treasure token: tap target creature.

Mr. Bennet is Green. Offspring 1. Vigilance. Pay 2GG: add +1/+1 counter to target human.

Mr. Darcy is Red-White. Created a treasure etb. Create a treasure and lose two life if untapped at your end step. Pay 3 and tap to exile target creature until Darcy exits the battlefield.

I really hate living in numberwang economy

Time to summarize Proust.

Barb, the platonic autist! Love this book but never made that connection.

I think a lot of the decisions along the way are defensible in the micro.

But, in the broader picture, NYT:

1) had an Epstein double-agent on staff
2) missed everything having to do with that story and the close links to a presidential frontrunner and later president

that's a massive failure

ahh yeah here he comes, big donnie t, donald j trump himself, looks like he brought a bag lunch, smart.

Cabinet members of every European parliament nervously smiling and laughing when they get together, saying "good thing there won't be any of *our* leaders in the Epstein files, right guys? haha right?"