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thellamagod.bsky.social
Llama God
@thellamagod.bsky.social
760 followers 520 following 10K posts
Six-winged god of llamas. Green. Conjunx Endura of @jobot935.bsky.social . Many Bothans died and many rich idiots showed their asses to bring you these... bleats? Which are all his own. Ofc. He/him.
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thellamagod.bsky.social
Except for this, which asks many questions, starting with: Why does she have a puppet of her boyfriend’s dad..?
Tauriel, with Thranduil in the background, the shot being taken from the BluRay menu screen. The placement of the menu bar and removes some vital depth information from the view, with the result being that it seems that both characters are on the same focus plane, but with Thranduil looking very small.
November 23, 2025 at 12:16 AM
thellamagod.bsky.social
The sex dwarf fails no nut November.
Kili, with a overwhelmed expression on his face, lying with his head on a pillow of walnuts. Because what could be more comfortable?
November 22, 2025 at 11:39 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Shot of the film.
Thorin, on profile, with the profile of the mighty statue of one of his forebears in the background
November 22, 2025 at 11:21 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
“My name… is Smaug.”
Smaug the dragon atop his mountains of gold in the mighty halls of Erebor, under the mountain Zachary Quinto as Spock and Chris Pine as Kirk from Star Trek Into Darkness
November 22, 2025 at 11:16 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Yes, I know she has a thing for hot messes, but this is a bit desperate - you’re not going to win your ex back…
#TROPRewatch
A shadow of the armoured figure of Sauron, emerging from a sea of flame.
November 22, 2025 at 11:09 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Non-white characters? In a Tolkien adaptation? What sort of woke nonsense is this?!
A crowd of the people of Laketown. Some of the background characters are not white. Just the background characters, mind you.
November 22, 2025 at 10:40 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Now this is why his show has been cancelled - he wasn’t a decent enough servant of an egotistical despot.
Stephen Colbert, as a spy for the Master of Laketown
November 22, 2025 at 10:31 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Sorry William, you’re a couple of thousand years too late to wrest control of the vineyard from Celebrimbor… #TRoPRewatch
Braga the guardsman of Laketown, as played by the same actor who plays William in Under the Vines. Also one of Quintus Batiatus’ men in Spartacus. But the only person who this information is of interest to is the person who’s composing this bleet.
November 22, 2025 at 10:30 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Ah, Alfrid. A character that Tolkien could not have created… because Tolkien was a competent storyteller.

Fuck off, Alfrid.
Alfrid, in Laketown. Why does he exist?
November 22, 2025 at 10:27 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Everyone enjoys that river, as @jobot935.bsky.social will attest…
Dwarves clambering out of barrels on the shore of a river Me, hanging wet and bedraggled from a barrel at the same location. The Conjunx doing similar.
November 22, 2025 at 10:06 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
The High Fells. So called because it’s where fellas go to greet each other. Maybe.
Gandalf climbing up some rather health and safety defying steps stuck some way up the sheer side of a mountain
November 22, 2025 at 9:59 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Because studio executives are grasping, creatively barren morons.
Legolas speaking to Tauriel, in the dungeons of the kingdom of the woodland realm. “Why does the dwarf stare at you, Tauriel?”
November 22, 2025 at 9:45 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
I watch The Desolation of Smaug for the plot.
The plot:
Close up of the thighs of Thranduil, sat on his throne Close up of Thranduil’s hand, resting in his kingly lap Close up of Thranduil’s piercing eyes
November 22, 2025 at 9:43 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
“Why don’t we use these prequels to take a beloved character and make everyone sick of the sight of him, and actively loathe him?” This is why executives are paid the big moneys.
Legolas Greenleaf, appearing with his bow drawn in Mirkwood, in the Hobbit films, for reasons known only to idiot executives.
November 22, 2025 at 9:40 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
They bearly got those doors closed in time.
The dwarves frantically trying to shut the doors of Beorn’s house, as a giant bear tries to force his way in.
November 22, 2025 at 9:00 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Saturday night, so time to continue our journey through Jackson’s Tolkienverse, with the most important prequel: Carrotman Begins!
Peter Jackson reprising his cameo as “carrot man” in the dark streets of the town of Bree
November 22, 2025 at 8:48 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
A few minutes ago they were happy to see the back of Galadriel, now they’re pledging themselves to go to war with her. I’m not saying that this is an island of easily-swayed idiots, but as someone with some experience of those things…
#TROPRewatch
Galadriel and Miriel stood in the throne room (or whatever) of Numenor, as the gathered crowds raise their arms in agreement
November 21, 2025 at 11:26 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
People say that this series isn’t true to Tolkien, but stone singers, using the music that is in the actual bones of the world, could not be any more Tolkien.
#TROPRewatch
Disa and her stone singers, stood bathed in a ray of light, singing to the mountain
November 21, 2025 at 11:09 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Legolas wishes.

I wonder if Oropher told his grandson tales of the elfiest elf that ever did elf..?
#TROPRewatch
Close up of Arondir pulling back a bowstring
November 21, 2025 at 11:06 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
One of my main problems with the adaptations is how they treat the Palantirs as naturally cursed god balls, instead of the misused long-distance communication devices that they originally were. The latter is much more interesting, not to mention much more relevant.
#TROPRewatch
Galadriel, with her hand outstretched, about to touch a seeing stone
November 21, 2025 at 11:00 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Yes, I know exactly why you want to gift that to Elrond.
#TROPRewatch
Durin IV holding up a nugget of Mithril
November 21, 2025 at 10:48 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
*Doom guy grunting noises*
#TROPRewatch
Elrond hammering with his fist against a stone wall, certain that it’s a secret door
November 21, 2025 at 10:45 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
“The orcs call me daddy.” They’re not the only ones.
#TROPRewatch
Adar, in profile, talking to Arondir.
November 21, 2025 at 10:33 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Barca, havs Isildur and the rest of them sent to the mines!
#TROPRewatch
The Numenorean sail master, telling Isildur that he’s off the sea guard.
November 21, 2025 at 10:31 PM
thellamagod.bsky.social
Elendilf’s terrible dad humour just makes me love him more.
#TROPRewatch
Queen Miriel: “And I suppose Elendil here is a Rhunic lord. Elendil, replying: Just a petty Lord, actually.
November 21, 2025 at 10:29 PM