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syko.ruins.party
🔞💭 syko
@syko.ruins.party
10 followers 18 following 230 posts
adult (20s) MDNI pls
vent diary (sometimes nsfw)

dni: general, drama, blocked
*PLS RESPECT DNI + BLOCKS*
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syko.ruins.party
stolen from oomf
(spoiler for those that don’t wanna see kinky shit)

half of my main kinks aren’t even on here 💔
January 20, 2026 at 4:44 PM
syko.ruins.party
more context to this rant. still bothering me, but I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do ab it.
I hate venting ab things w him, bc he really is good to me and I don’t want to paint him in a negative light.
I’m just confused and hurt and wanted to share somewhere, bc fussing at him won’t change it.
Friday, January 2, 2026 03:20 AM start to 2026: the first day was wasted away and I was constantly misgendered by my own partner. I want to note and explain the reasons this bothers me so much. 1. our friends accomodate more often than I feel he does. there are friends like [REDACTED] who had been using neutral/ masc terms long before I even expressed that I was leaning more towards masculine identity. 2. I have rarely had to remind anyone else, but I can count at least 3 or 4 times that i've had to sit down with him and remind him that if he's going to use gendered pronouns, i'd prefer it to be he/him rather than she/her. Friday, January 2, 2026 I would be more lenient, because I know sometimes it can be difficult at first or in early stages to adapt to transitioning when you've already known the person for a while. however, I have more reasons to explain why I'm still bothered and reluctant to give him the benefit of doubt. 3. he has a friend from [REDACTED], [REDACTED], who very shortly prior to me requesting he cut contact with them, came out to him as nonbinary/fluid of sorts and expressed that they now use they/them pronouns. he was very quick to adapt and correct others once notified of this (mind you, he has not seen this friend or had much long-term or close contact with them since about 2019-2020) Friday, January 2, 2026 it kind of hurts that he seemed so willing to accommodate for them, but not his own partner. in another case, his bestfriend's partner is a (as far as I'm aware) transwoman, and he had no issues accommodating for her as well. the only struggle in confusion he seems to have regarding anyone transitioning, is what they're transitioning from and to, not necessarily using their preferred pronouns properly. 4. I even wrote out a list/ cheatsheet whatever for him of terms I'm okay with and terms I'm not, and it sits in his bedside table. Friday, January 2, 2026 5. I talk to him about my gender dysphoria, my theories, and my future plans for hrt and possible surgery later in life almost daily, and he listens attentively, not tuning me out or anything. 6. it makes me feel as though he only respects it or accommodates when I'm around. according to things he's told me of prior conversations with friends/ coworkers, that wouldn't be the case. but it leaves me in a spot of confusion and uncomfortability, because I feel as though I "can't" or shouldn't correct him or others when it occurs.
January 3, 2026 at 12:57 AM
syko.ruins.party
ah, that explains so much.
a drawing of a relatively empty bedroom with only a bed and dresser in it, with the caption: “turns out if you fuck up even just a little bit you become a preteen forever and this is how the world feels”
November 25, 2025 at 4:03 PM
syko.ruins.party
fuck me, man. fuck this goddamned house.
September 26, 2025 at 9:52 PM
syko.ruins.party
basically how life has gone since I stopped ignoring the voices
September 23, 2025 at 10:53 PM