Kate schwagnerbutt
swagglebutt.bsky.social
Kate schwagnerbutt
@swagglebutt.bsky.social
Charmstrangecrochet.etsy.com
Linktr.ee/charmandstrange
Pinned
Shit my husband says while playing video games that sounds unhinged out of context: 📌 a running thread for our entertainment
My mom only had time & budget for Christmas gifts for her grandkids this year. My husband & I are childfree and she bought some new toys for our cat 🥰👏🎄😸
December 26, 2025 at 3:33 AM
Attention offices that tend to get a lot of calls and have a hold service:
You really, really don't need to repeat the "our call volume is high" message every 30 seconds. I get it. I'd rather listen to your smooth jazz music for a few minutes at a time, thanks.
December 18, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Remember, friends: clothing made from "recycled polyester" is STILL PLASTIC CLOTHING. It's gonna be hot, sweaty, drape poorly, and look cheap & shitty after a season or 2 just as badly as clothes made from new polyester. It's not environmentally friendly if it can't be repaired after years of wear.
December 10, 2025 at 4:40 PM
U ever just minding ur business when a giant chunk of dust falls off the ceiling fan and reminds u to clean 🤣
December 5, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Why the FUCK does health care get to decide that 3 months after an appointment, I still owe money?

The US health care system is such a fucking joke designed to let as many people as possible either drown in debt or just die. Burn the whole system to the ground.
December 5, 2025 at 2:47 PM
I feel like every time I get a political spam text and respond "End," they sign me up for 3 other lists.

Oddly, I got almost zero texts before November's election. Now I'm getting flooded almost daily w random candidates asking for money in states I've never visited. Why do u need money rn???
December 3, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Clothing companies be like "we offer a neutral palette so you can wear our clothes to the office!" and everything is black, cream, grey, brown.
Then
"We have colors now for a little fun! 🙂" and it's a faded blue-toned grey, sage green, and pink so soft it's barely pink
WHY R U ALLERGIC TO COLOR 😭
December 1, 2025 at 8:11 PM
Apparently I am a bully for saying that people who aren't interested in selling their crocheted goods for a profit don't belong in a group called "Crochet for Vendors." lolwut WHY are people so damn sensitive 🤣
November 30, 2025 at 6:15 AM
When someone posts in a big group on social media, and then when they get a response they don't like they say "mind your business"

Honey you made it anyone's business by posting in a group, just because you disagree with someone doesn't mean they're being rude by sharing their thoughts 🤣
November 24, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Today's set is such a skeleton crew that I'm running audio as well as script supervising. I keep forgetting to cut audio, and once I forgot to roll it 😶🫥

Indie film is far from graceful lmao
November 23, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Some people are really hating on cropped sweaters in a semi-viral post and I'm over here like cropped sweaters are just good length sweaters on me. I have so little torso vertically. Please don't be mad at ppl who rely on cropped clothes to just fit normally. 😭
November 21, 2025 at 12:47 AM
My bff to a girl at the club: "I love your top!"
Girl: "Thanks, it's from Shein!"
bff to me, later: "When girls say their clothes are from Shein I want to tell them I don't like it anymore."

Aaaand this is just 1 of a billion reasons we're friends 😂
November 21, 2025 at 12:06 AM
How the FUCK did I, a registered Democrat but really a progressive democratic socialist, who has donated to Leftist politicians and charities, get on the email list for the fucking Heritage Foundation???
Someone must've sold them my info. No way do I belong to anything parallel. 🤮
November 11, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Man oh man does V For Vendetta hit differently post Covid and during Trump's second term.
November 6, 2025 at 2:25 AM
I didn't think I was the parasocial type
But the other night I had a dream that @cakejumper.bsky.social personally called my cell phone to make sure I'd catch her stream later that day
???
I don't even participate in chat 🤣
November 5, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Picking characters in a Buffy board game, Mark said "should I be Broody Boy, Rapey Boy, Sucks Ass Boy, or Smokin' Daddy Boy?"

I didn't even have to see the character cards to know who he meant for each one 🤣
November 3, 2025 at 5:18 AM
Mark: "Just like Cher, it's all coming back to me now."
Me: "Um. That's a Celine Dion song."
🤣
November 3, 2025 at 5:14 AM
I opened X to tag the podcast I love, scrolled for 30 seconds and got a suggested tweet from the TERF queen and an ad for Shein pretending to be environmentally conscious. Fuck that place. I wish Grimm Reading would get on Bluesky :(
November 2, 2025 at 6:23 AM
Some tights company is advertising themselves as the way to avoid "diaper butt" and I'm over here like who tf gets diaper butt from their tights?? This is not a problem I have ever experienced or even heard of.
November 1, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Masculinity is so fragile that basic hygiene has to be marketed as manly.

Saw an ad for WWE-branded soap. Just a bar of soap with wrestlers' names & pics on the label. Which u throw away.

Also butt wipes. Dude Wipes is a whole brand, as if using Cottonelle wipes would be too gay.

Boys, whyyy 🤣😭
October 28, 2025 at 4:45 PM
Can I just remind everyone that a little bit of steam goes a LONG way for ur Halloween costumes

The same $40 plastic outfit can look like a $20 mess if it has all the packaging fold lines, or a $50 decent cosplay if you steam it & it just has gentle life wrinkles.
October 28, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Our Costco stopped carrying Trubar protein bars for a few months and we were really sad but they finally brought them back and in a NEW FLAVOR PACK no less!!! Cookies & Cream and chocolate coconut. 🤤 Was getting tired of the PB&J bar that tasted more like sesame oil than peanut butter.
October 21, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Just saw that Sora has to spend $5 on every single video people create and they have no idea how to monetize the platform. I would absolutely generate dozens of videos a day just to waste their money if it didn't also mean consuming resources and damaging the environment.
October 17, 2025 at 10:48 PM
There are 2 villains in this book and they have absolutely 100% caused every death, injury, and problem. They keep blaming the MC for everything instead bc "you should have left well enough alone, it wouldn't have happened if you left" 🙄🙄🙄 TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY FOR UR ACTIONS GUYS WTF
September 30, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Let the race to get as much work done as possible before the brain fog & fatigue from the covid & flu shots sets in begin!
September 30, 2025 at 12:48 PM