Soft In The Conch
@softintheconch.bsky.social
America’s favorite nobody™️ I like tiki bars/cocktails, Exotica music, Palm Springs and mid century modern design.
I can't go out tonight. I'm busy waxing my gibbous.
December 4, 2025 at 12:30 AM
I can't go out tonight. I'm busy waxing my gibbous.
I think my HOA dues are going up to $420 from $350. 🫤
December 1, 2025 at 11:24 PM
I think my HOA dues are going up to $420 from $350. 🫤
If there is a giant apartment building put up on the lot, I think I'm moving.
December 1, 2025 at 6:46 PM
If there is a giant apartment building put up on the lot, I think I'm moving.
The house next to my condo has removed the tree that screened the view between our properties. I hope they enjoy seeing me walk around naked.
December 1, 2025 at 5:48 PM
The house next to my condo has removed the tree that screened the view between our properties. I hope they enjoy seeing me walk around naked.
$4.599 a gallon. And here’s the breakdown.
November 29, 2025 at 8:34 PM
$4.599 a gallon. And here’s the breakdown.
I just came back from a walk. I was wearing shorts. Warm!
November 28, 2025 at 9:47 PM
I just came back from a walk. I was wearing shorts. Warm!
Anyone who thinks turkey is disgusting has to report to work tomorrow morning. You brought this on yourself. Sorry not sorry.
November 27, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Anyone who thinks turkey is disgusting has to report to work tomorrow morning. You brought this on yourself. Sorry not sorry.
Did you wash your plastic shower curtain today? I did.
November 26, 2025 at 8:03 PM
Did you wash your plastic shower curtain today? I did.
Deforestation day 2.
November 26, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Deforestation day 2.
Now they've come for this big tree on the other side. There won't be any trees or shade left.
November 25, 2025 at 7:55 PM
Now they've come for this big tree on the other side. There won't be any trees or shade left.
So long palm trees. I liked seeing them from my window.
November 25, 2025 at 6:32 PM
So long palm trees. I liked seeing them from my window.
Red Alert! The focaccia is about to go into the oven.
November 24, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Red Alert! The focaccia is about to go into the oven.
I'm steaming my pudding right this very moment.
November 24, 2025 at 7:01 PM
I'm steaming my pudding right this very moment.
Pluribus is my new favorite TV show!
November 23, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Pluribus is my new favorite TV show!
Look what we got going here. The start of a Christmas pudding.
November 22, 2025 at 11:03 PM
Look what we got going here. The start of a Christmas pudding.
Clerk asked me my age at the BevMo.
a man with a beard and glasses is holding his chest and saying `` i 'm in my prime ! ''
ALT: a man with a beard and glasses is holding his chest and saying `` i 'm in my prime ! ''
media.tenor.com
November 22, 2025 at 11:02 PM
Clerk asked me my age at the BevMo.
Did you know you can pay a man stick his finger in your mouth, and it's totally legal if you call it a copay?
November 19, 2025 at 11:16 PM
Did you know you can pay a man stick his finger in your mouth, and it's totally legal if you call it a copay?
I always forget to take the phyllo dough out of the freezer to let it thaw.
November 17, 2025 at 11:20 PM
I always forget to take the phyllo dough out of the freezer to let it thaw.
How can a storm be an early winter storm if it's not winter? Isn't it just an autumn storm?
November 13, 2025 at 7:53 PM
How can a storm be an early winter storm if it's not winter? Isn't it just an autumn storm?
I got a clothing catalog in the mail, and it seems so anachronistic. You can't filter by size, color, in stock, etc. like you can online.
November 13, 2025 at 12:46 AM
I got a clothing catalog in the mail, and it seems so anachronistic. You can't filter by size, color, in stock, etc. like you can online.
What will @urtheepiotome.bsky.social do now that the penny won't be minted anymore? RIP squashed pennies!
November 13, 2025 at 12:35 AM
What will @urtheepiotome.bsky.social do now that the penny won't be minted anymore? RIP squashed pennies!
Would you believe I was in the Walgreen pharmacy phone queue for an hour and half? There were three calls ahead of me. When it was my turn, we were done in less than 5 minutes. WTF was taking so long?
November 12, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Would you believe I was in the Walgreen pharmacy phone queue for an hour and half? There were three calls ahead of me. When it was my turn, we were done in less than 5 minutes. WTF was taking so long?
Microsoft wants to know how likely I am to recommend Microsoft 365 Copilot Chat to others. Just fuck off and die, will you. Let me do my work and leave me a lone, for fuck's sake.
November 11, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Microsoft wants to know how likely I am to recommend Microsoft 365 Copilot Chat to others. Just fuck off and die, will you. Let me do my work and leave me a lone, for fuck's sake.
I spent 20 minutes in line at Kohls to return that other person's misdelivered clothing. Did I earn my good deed badge for the day?
November 8, 2025 at 11:23 PM
I spent 20 minutes in line at Kohls to return that other person's misdelivered clothing. Did I earn my good deed badge for the day?
I want to eat like a hobbit. #secondlunch
November 6, 2025 at 8:24 PM
I want to eat like a hobbit. #secondlunch