starting to think it makes sense that people like this are the ones that end up making shortform social media platforms

no one can save me from myself

i feel so close to reaching the point where ive so utterly destroyed myself and my relationships that i have nothing left. there is nothing i wont make myself lose. im so fucking empty and any time i try to fill the void inside myself i destroy whatever i put there i don't know what to do anymore

ive never felt so miserable and pathetic. all i do is destroy my own happiness. i fucking hate myself so much right now

between the internet bill and my car problems and my neck exploding i'm just kind of ultra-fucked rn but yknow that's fine

i hope it was at least entertaining for some of you to watch me crumble over and over again but now it's gone for good <3

at least no one will have to hear me vomit nonsense about a fucking yogurt bow ever again

i can't bring myself to burden specific people with this shit. couldn't even bring myself to respond to my therapist today. so i'm shouting it into the void because i can't fucking take it anymore. i'm sick of pretending i can be ok. i hate myself, my life, my mind, my body, my memories, everything

i sleep on a bloodstained mattress every night. my arm is so scarred that no one even notices when i add new ones, and i'm never gonna get all the shards of broken glass out of my messy shithole room. i have cuts on my arms and legs and hands and neck and face and body

funny how i've always been so afraid of actually attempting to take my own life and now i wonder if i've gone and given myself the slowest and most excruciating death possible

guess i'm getting what my past self wanted after all