Michael, unable to think of a cool name
@returnofthegoth.bsky.social
“The chances of finding out what’s really going on in the universe are so remote, the only thing to do is hang the sense of it and keep yourself occupied.” - Slartibartfast
Hey @gratefuldavid.bsky.social I think it’s time for another
November 17, 2025 at 2:04 AM
Hey @gratefuldavid.bsky.social I think it’s time for another
I think one of the worst insults you can hurl is “raggedy ass”
November 17, 2025 at 2:01 AM
I think one of the worst insults you can hurl is “raggedy ass”
My mom watches Big Bang Theory every night. I didn’t realize until now how annoying every character is
November 12, 2025 at 1:10 AM
My mom watches Big Bang Theory every night. I didn’t realize until now how annoying every character is
Laugh tracks have never made up for mediocre jokes
November 12, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Laugh tracks have never made up for mediocre jokes
I’m surprised it took him this long for pardons
November 10, 2025 at 10:30 PM
I’m surprised it took him this long for pardons
Food take: truffles are gross. All that money to taste more like feet than Fritos
November 1, 2025 at 7:12 PM
Food take: truffles are gross. All that money to taste more like feet than Fritos
Yesterday was the 100th day since my cancer diagnosis, and 101 days since I nearly died on my bathroom floor from internal bleeding
In the words of Sir Elton, “I’m still standing”
In the words of Sir Elton, “I’m still standing”
October 30, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Yesterday was the 100th day since my cancer diagnosis, and 101 days since I nearly died on my bathroom floor from internal bleeding
In the words of Sir Elton, “I’m still standing”
In the words of Sir Elton, “I’m still standing”
When Donald Trump says “low IQ” he means n***** and I hate him for it
October 28, 2025 at 10:42 PM
When Donald Trump says “low IQ” he means n***** and I hate him for it
I’ve seen a lot of “he’s building a bunker” and y’all…
You don’t build a secret bunker where people can take photos of every stage of construction. Trump might be that stupid but the people around him aren’t
You don’t build a secret bunker where people can take photos of every stage of construction. Trump might be that stupid but the people around him aren’t
October 25, 2025 at 3:24 PM
I’ve seen a lot of “he’s building a bunker” and y’all…
You don’t build a secret bunker where people can take photos of every stage of construction. Trump might be that stupid but the people around him aren’t
You don’t build a secret bunker where people can take photos of every stage of construction. Trump might be that stupid but the people around him aren’t
I genuinely do not care about the ballroom, especially in light of everything else he’s done
October 22, 2025 at 11:22 PM
I genuinely do not care about the ballroom, especially in light of everything else he’s done
I’m convinced Rachel Maddow doesn’t have any friends with ADHD because they’d all be telling her to stop repeating phrases and stop using unnecessarily long pauses and just get to the point
October 21, 2025 at 9:02 PM
I’m convinced Rachel Maddow doesn’t have any friends with ADHD because they’d all be telling her to stop repeating phrases and stop using unnecessarily long pauses and just get to the point
It isn’t covert if we know about it 🤨
“The new authority would allow the C.I.A. to carry out lethal operations in Venezuela…The agency would be able to take covert action against Mr. Maduro or his government either unilaterally or in conjunction with a larger military operation.”
Regime change is back.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/15/u...
Regime change is back.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/15/u...
Trump Administration Authorizes Covert C.I.A. Action in Venezuela
www.nytimes.com
October 15, 2025 at 8:04 PM
It isn’t covert if we know about it 🤨
Android: turn alarm volume up in the alarms
iOS: sound and haptics > ringtone and alerts
This is yet another reason iOS is NOT intuitive and remains an inferior product
I’m keeping my iPhone because it’s paid off by this was the worst phone decision I’ve ever made. I miss my Pixel
iOS: sound and haptics > ringtone and alerts
This is yet another reason iOS is NOT intuitive and remains an inferior product
I’m keeping my iPhone because it’s paid off by this was the worst phone decision I’ve ever made. I miss my Pixel
October 15, 2025 at 7:08 PM
Android: turn alarm volume up in the alarms
iOS: sound and haptics > ringtone and alerts
This is yet another reason iOS is NOT intuitive and remains an inferior product
I’m keeping my iPhone because it’s paid off by this was the worst phone decision I’ve ever made. I miss my Pixel
iOS: sound and haptics > ringtone and alerts
This is yet another reason iOS is NOT intuitive and remains an inferior product
I’m keeping my iPhone because it’s paid off by this was the worst phone decision I’ve ever made. I miss my Pixel
Reposted by Michael, unable to think of a cool name
If Barack Obama had announced that a middle eastern country was going to build a military base in Idaho….
October 10, 2025 at 7:01 PM
If Barack Obama had announced that a middle eastern country was going to build a military base in Idaho….
Bosses who ask this should be fired immediately for not knowing what their organization does
News: Bari Weiss just sent a memo to staffers at CBS News asking them to produce a memo explaining "how you spend your working hours—and ideally, what you've made (or are making) that you're most proud of."
One CBS News staffer puts it like this to me: "We just got Elon Musked."
One CBS News staffer puts it like this to me: "We just got Elon Musked."
October 10, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Bosses who ask this should be fired immediately for not knowing what their organization does
White liberals: there are no ethical billionaires
Also white liberals: omg tswift squeeee
Also white liberals: omg tswift squeeee
October 9, 2025 at 5:27 PM
White liberals: there are no ethical billionaires
Also white liberals: omg tswift squeeee
Also white liberals: omg tswift squeeee
It’s a literal shame that video game makers refuse to have an option to increase menu text size
October 9, 2025 at 2:01 PM
It’s a literal shame that video game makers refuse to have an option to increase menu text size
I don’t think anything will change until the boomers are uninvolved
September 29, 2025 at 11:07 PM
I don’t think anything will change until the boomers are uninvolved
If you never had red drink from a small plastic barrel your daycare must’ve been bougie
September 25, 2025 at 4:51 PM
If you never had red drink from a small plastic barrel your daycare must’ve been bougie
*whispers* {they’re trying to build a prison}
September 24, 2025 at 1:53 PM
*whispers* {they’re trying to build a prison}
Pooh Bear. Winnie, the Pooh Bear.
That is all.
That is all.
September 23, 2025 at 2:02 PM
Pooh Bear. Winnie, the Pooh Bear.
That is all.
That is all.
White people please stop correcting non-white people about supposedly racist comments they make about their own folks
See: Patels dragging the absolute fuck out of the current FBI Director and white people crying about the racism
See: Patels dragging the absolute fuck out of the current FBI Director and white people crying about the racism
September 19, 2025 at 6:13 PM
White people please stop correcting non-white people about supposedly racist comments they make about their own folks
See: Patels dragging the absolute fuck out of the current FBI Director and white people crying about the racism
See: Patels dragging the absolute fuck out of the current FBI Director and white people crying about the racism
Losing my ass (literally) has been one of the more irritating (literally) parts of cancer weight loss. Sitting on the toilet hurts my butt
It took me 39 years to build that rear end and just a handful of weeks to lose it 😭
It took me 39 years to build that rear end and just a handful of weeks to lose it 😭
September 19, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Losing my ass (literally) has been one of the more irritating (literally) parts of cancer weight loss. Sitting on the toilet hurts my butt
It took me 39 years to build that rear end and just a handful of weeks to lose it 😭
It took me 39 years to build that rear end and just a handful of weeks to lose it 😭
Soak ya beans. Thrice. At least six hours per soak, with a change of water each time. Then cook them in clean water
Your gut and friends will thank you
If they start to sprout, that’s great. A big contributor to flatulence are water soluble compounds that inhibit germination until planted
Your gut and friends will thank you
If they start to sprout, that’s great. A big contributor to flatulence are water soluble compounds that inhibit germination until planted
September 14, 2025 at 5:51 AM
Soak ya beans. Thrice. At least six hours per soak, with a change of water each time. Then cook them in clean water
Your gut and friends will thank you
If they start to sprout, that’s great. A big contributor to flatulence are water soluble compounds that inhibit germination until planted
Your gut and friends will thank you
If they start to sprout, that’s great. A big contributor to flatulence are water soluble compounds that inhibit germination until planted