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rain-wantsahug.bsky.social
Rain🖍️
@rain-wantsahug.bsky.social
6 followers 21 following 6 posts
17
They/xe/ze/she
I will block you if you're weird.
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theonion.com
Bullshit Newborn Not Even Christ https://theonion.com/bullshit-newborn-not-even-christ/
Bullshit Newborn Not Even Christ Stupid Baby Probably Not Even Related To God
December 25, 2025 at 6:30 PM
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theonion.com
JD Vance Cries In Bathroom After Trump Uses ‘Piggy’ Nickname On Someone Else https://theonion.com/jd-vance-cries-in-bathroom-after-trump-uses-piggy-nickname-on-someone-else/
JD Vance Cries In Bathroom After Trump Uses ‘Piggy’ Nickname On Someone Else
November 21, 2025 at 7:00 PM
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theonion.com
Steak ’N Shake Employee Screams After Nude RFK Jr. Climbs Out Of Beef Tallow Fryer
Steak ’N Shake Employee Screams After Nude RFK Jr. Climbs Out Of Beef Tallow Fryer
SOUTH BEND, IN—Expressing horror at the sight of the health secretary’s bare torso emerging from the vat of grease, a local Steak ’n Shake employee reportedly screamed Friday after a nude Robert F. Ke...
theonion.com
November 21, 2025 at 8:16 PM
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billielhindle.bsky.social
“I asked ChatGPT!” “I asked Grok!” Yeah, well I asked FR3-D1 and he said “.jmj error” and then read me a story about a man who turned into a tree.
July 18, 2025 at 10:46 AM
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theonion.com
Elon Musk Weeps, For There Are No More Women To Impregnate
Elon Musk Weeps, For There Are No More Women To Impregnate
AUSTIN, TX—Realizing that every uterus had already been conquered, Tesla CEO Elon Musk reportedly wept Wednesday, for there were no more women for him to impregnate. “I have sown the many fields with ...
theonion.com
July 9, 2025 at 2:59 PM
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theonion.com
The Onion’s Summer Box Office Preview
theonion.com/the-oni...
Smurfs: A musical fantasy comedy voiced by a star-studded cast, with graphic sex scenes that technically don’t count as porn because Smurfs don’t have human genitalia.
July 3, 2025 at 9:00 PM
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theonion.com
How Deportation Works
theonion.com/how-dep...
How Deportation Works Authorities confirm suspects’ illegal status by arresting them.
May 1, 2025 at 8:00 PM
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theonion.com
Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database
April 30, 2025 at 5:00 PM
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nightvaleradio.bsky.social
Ask your doctor for the codephrase. Make sure they are not an imposter.
April 30, 2025 at 5:02 PM
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theonion.com
Sleep Experts Suggest Cutting Back On God’s Light Before Bed
theonion.com/sleep-e...
Sleep Experts Suggest Cutting Back On God’s Light Before Bed
April 30, 2025 at 8:00 PM
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nightvaleradio.bsky.social
The wise man sees there is two sides to every issue: my way or the freakin highway bud.
April 25, 2025 at 5:04 PM
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theonion.com
Food Stamps: Myth Vs. Fact
theonion.com/food-st...
MYTH: Democrats use food stamps as a bribe so people will vote for them. FACT: Democrats would never be this cutthroat or clever.
April 2, 2025 at 7:00 PM
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billielhindle.bsky.social
I know being visible is hard right now, and you’re no less valid for having to hide. Deep down, know that this is your day too. I love you x
The transgender flag with the text Happy Trans Day of Visibility
March 31, 2025 at 10:11 AM
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bunnyfangs.posts.love
i know i’m about to start my period because i keep crying over the baby ghast
March 23, 2025 at 7:04 PM
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book960.bsky.social
March 14, 2025 at 10:15 PM
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theonion.com
Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver
theonion.com/report-...
Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver
March 14, 2025 at 9:00 PM
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nightvaleradio.bsky.social
A black square. At the top right of the square is a purple almond shaped Night Vale eye with a white crescent moon in the iris. Below this in white text is the quote: Call me old-fashioned, but we should have never grown legs and crawled out of the ocean.
March 5, 2025 at 6:00 PM
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theonion.com
Reptile Handler At Birthday Party Ruthlessly Heckled By 6-Year-Old For Showing Amphibian
theonion.com/reptile...
Reptile Handler At Birthday Party Ruthlessly Heckled By 6-Year-Old For Showing Amphibian 
CLEVELAND—Interrupting the man mere seconds after he removed a Japanese clouded salamander from its cage, local 6-year-old Matthew Cronin ruthlessly heckled a reptile handler at a birthday party for showing an amphibian, sources reported Friday. “Oh, come on, clearly that thing isn’t a reptile—it doesn’t even have scales!” said Cronin, who added that he wasn’t […]
theonion.com
February 23, 2025 at 7:00 PM
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anusiabattersby.bsky.social
The Magnus Protocol returns this week for the start of its second season. 👁

Hope you're all ready for a veritable terrormisu of horrors!

#TMagP
February 24, 2025 at 12:29 AM
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billielhindle.bsky.social
Oh yeah, Protocol returns this week. How we feeling?
February 23, 2025 at 11:47 AM
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nightvaleradio.bsky.social
Stomp and smell the flowers
February 21, 2025 at 5:00 PM
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billielhindle.bsky.social
❤️Happy Black History Month!❤️
February 1, 2025 at 10:34 PM
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nhannahjones.bsky.social
Reporters: Please stop calling things DEI that are not DEI. This is only cementing the propaganda being used to legitimize the dismantling of all types of initiatives that are not DEI as well as legitimize efforts to end civil rights enforcement. Be specific with your language. Be accurate.
January 29, 2025 at 7:26 PM
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estel62.bsky.social
January 29, 2025 at 8:28 PM