The phantom menace (chiropractors)

I am offering $10,000 to anyone who can give me the Midtown gunman’s Venmo

wow the parade this year was crazy

My dealer: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called “the tower of Babel” 😳

Me: yeah whatever. I don’t feel shit.

5 minutes later: Ich habe gerade jemanden in Zungen sprechen hören, lol

My buddy Uruk pacing: 我們的驕傲將摧毀這座城市

Once again weeping that I can never create something as funny as "1 day blinding stew"

Unfortunately this will likely contribute only to optics. Hopeful, but doubt anything will actually come of this.

Exactly the guy I go to when I want to be lectured on how to be more normal

Imagine if Al-Queda had access to the Ram 1500 Bighorn

I could never and will never understand blue collar workers who are anti union. I’ve worked non union. I’ve worked union. Trust me the grass is actually greener.

“What radicalized you?” Bro I was told to treat people the way I would want to be treated in kindergarten and it made sense idk what else there is to say

Taking my Dune worm popcorn bucket into the Wicked screening and telling everyone it’s in the movie

Gotta say, the lack of bots and nazis here is pretty great

Don’t excuse him. This man defended Israel his entire life and peddled vile, evil lies up until only recently. Fuck you. These people are not your friends.