Being super afraid of phone calls doesn't preclude you from putting one in. If all you can truly manage is "I need to file a complaint about your censorship of legal adult content because it's wrong and it's making me lose faith that you're someone I can continue to use (or something)" that is fine

It gets easier the more you do it so use that as a starting point. It's never as bad as it is in your head

they may not be actively cancelling transactions, but they ARE getting in the way of people being able to use THEIR MONEY to buy and sell LEGAL content.

stress how this is hurting your opinion of these brands, and making you consider dropping them/ getting a different card

I called both VISA and Mastercard.

MC was quick to hang up on me.

More interestingly though, the VISA agent explicitly said "yes" when I asked them if VISA is actively trying to censor online content.
I'll call them back today about this

Honestly, people calling creators the "petite bourgeoisie" makes me want to snap.

We're working folk. And we work really hard. For next to nothing.

We're not lounging around eating bonbons. We're trying to figure out how we're going to be able to pay rent next month.