(So a few times in college, we played chess for shots.

Pawns are some wine or liquer, rooks/bishops are whiskey or bourbon. Traditionally the queen would be a shot of Bacardi 151; losing meant drinking whatever was left on the board.

One time a "friend" filled the back row with Malort.)

Give me the gift of Twenty Five Airplane Bottles of Malort this Christmas. You surely will not regret leaving me unsupervised with Twenty Five Airplane Bottles of Malort

I'm still sad the lawyer wouldn't let me embed xkcd.com/2867/ in my declaration even though it was the right call because the judge was not the type who'd appreciate it. It was relevant to my argument, even!

and look, I say “no 3rd grader could possibly follow,” but I have spent the last 32 years being like “Mr Freed was quite clear about the knock-on effects of inflation,” so who am I to question his choices!