these are the tweets that almost make Bluesky worth it 😭
Olivia Nuzzi got sent in to do a profile but it turned out she wanted to fuck the subject so we sent in Jacob Bernstein to profile her and it turns out he also wants to fuck the subject
you can’t be putting this in the paper (gift link but i do not recommend you use it www.nytimes.com/2025/11/14/s...)
November 18, 2025 at 2:00 PM
these are the tweets that almost make Bluesky worth it 😭
Uber charged me $50 tor a 6 minute ride.. let me bend if I’m outside past 10pm again
September 9, 2025 at 4:55 AM
Uber charged me $50 tor a 6 minute ride.. let me bend if I’m outside past 10pm again
I wish I called my friends more
September 2, 2025 at 1:51 AM
I wish I called my friends more
speaking of things I got wrong.. I did not see TikTok shop becoming what it’s become (in the US) in a million years. really really impressed with their execution
August 26, 2025 at 9:25 PM
speaking of things I got wrong.. I did not see TikTok shop becoming what it’s become (in the US) in a million years. really really impressed with their execution
Liable to crash out at any given moment
August 24, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Liable to crash out at any given moment
Nfana Inaga. Verse 2. Line 1.
August 13, 2025 at 1:03 PM
Nfana Inaga. Verse 2. Line 1.
some days you just wake up & leave Robbie’s Son on repeat for a few hours
June 28, 2025 at 2:07 PM
some days you just wake up & leave Robbie’s Son on repeat for a few hours
looooove Brussels spouts but I had some tonight that made me almost never want to eat them again smh
May 16, 2025 at 3:03 AM
looooove Brussels spouts but I had some tonight that made me almost never want to eat them again smh
“as long as you don’t think you’re making it out unscathed”
May 15, 2025 at 2:06 AM
“as long as you don’t think you’re making it out unscathed”
I rap that third verse on No Apologies with *so much passion* 😆
May 14, 2025 at 12:48 AM
I rap that third verse on No Apologies with *so much passion* 😆
just hope I make it out unscathed
May 12, 2025 at 3:49 AM
just hope I make it out unscathed
pro tip: FNF right after a nap will energize you, especially if you really are FNF
May 5, 2025 at 2:31 AM
pro tip: FNF right after a nap will energize you, especially if you really are FNF
MG Siegler with a victory lap to rival Prof G’s lol
May 1, 2025 at 2:28 PM
MG Siegler with a victory lap to rival Prof G’s lol
can’t convince me the YouTube app for Apple TV isn’t awful on purpose
April 25, 2025 at 5:26 PM
can’t convince me the YouTube app for Apple TV isn’t awful on purpose
renewed my lease yesterday, touring a new apartment today because you gotta keep your enemies confused
April 24, 2025 at 9:12 PM
renewed my lease yesterday, touring a new apartment today because you gotta keep your enemies confused
I have to force myself to remember for a reason
April 8, 2025 at 10:33 PM
I have to force myself to remember for a reason
is it just me or has everyone else’s for you feed on Bluesky gone to absolute dog shit? I barely interact with anything here, why is my timeline full of bots & fake ai corn pages 😭
April 7, 2025 at 9:13 PM
is it just me or has everyone else’s for you feed on Bluesky gone to absolute dog shit? I barely interact with anything here, why is my timeline full of bots & fake ai corn pages 😭
Gary Oldman’s character in Slow Horses is the kind of mean grumpy man I want to be (am)
April 7, 2025 at 4:04 AM
Gary Oldman’s character in Slow Horses is the kind of mean grumpy man I want to be (am)
if I didn’t physically pay for it & lay on the table myself you wouldn’t have been able to convince me I got a massage today smh
April 6, 2025 at 10:18 PM
if I didn’t physically pay for it & lay on the table myself you wouldn’t have been able to convince me I got a massage today smh
weekend plans: catch up on White Lotus before the finale
April 4, 2025 at 10:54 PM
weekend plans: catch up on White Lotus before the finale
I like standing on solid ground
April 1, 2025 at 7:03 PM
I like standing on solid ground
got up this morning & played 4x4 alllllll day
April 1, 2025 at 2:13 AM
got up this morning & played 4x4 alllllll day
always gotta learn the lesson the hard way
March 28, 2025 at 5:18 AM
always gotta learn the lesson the hard way