“Militiamen”/“rebel fighters” have full kit and even some semblance of god damn air support these days. These aren’t the insurgents with the odd mortar of yesteryear. They’re fully-fledged legs of the deterrence efforts of regional powers.

War has changed.

Tommy Lefroy is doing things musically and emotionally that shouldn’t be possible

Every time I mention that I’m torn between spending retirement as a kooky old guy in a log cabin in the woods vs as a kooky old guy in an Airstream in the desert, every single person, no matter how long they’ve known me, is immediately like “oh you’re 100% the desert kind”

said “I’m looking for the Isabella to my Ferdinand” to our Puerto Rican head of recruiting and I saw him gain a new favorite phrase to describe himself and his wife in real time

guy who is both annoyed at earth for having too many clouds and also loves rain (me)

I am God’s strongest Houston hater

if you don’t want your opponent to plant their flag midfield in your house, beat them. It’s that simple.

simulpoasting to three twitteresque apps at once. The future is now.

my stepfather is very Swiss but became a huge Dallas Cowboys fan after moving to the states in the 90s

it’s always hilarious hearing his Swiss German accent yelling “WHY DON’T YOU CALL A TIMEOÜÜÜT”

Every time I mention that I’m torn between spending retirement as a kooky old guy in a log cabin in the woods vs as a kooky old guy in an Airstream in the desert, every single person, no matter how long they’ve known me, is like “oh you’re 100% the desert kind”

late at night, down a YouTube rabbit hole, wishing I’d made things work with that boring ass woman who at least had a dropout membership

if i ever say the words "the intersection of sports and pop culture" aloud in sequence my corporeal form will instantly vaporize. it's not that i will have died, exactly, so much that i will never have existed at all

I need to write a bot that takes my tweets and copies them here

if I follow you on twitter but don’t follow you here please lmk so I can correct that