Melinda Massie
melindamassie.bsky.social
Melinda Massie
@melindamassie.bsky.social
Standardized Patient & performer. I like to drink coffee and crochet while watching cult documentaries. Enjoy cursing, indulgent food, and champagne.
Reposted by Melinda Massie
November 5, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Update: Dad has been singing the Witches Ballad from Agatha All Along for the last three days.
After I started taking care of Dad last year, he learned that Halloween week means watching my fave witchy movies and you know what?

Dad loves this shit too!
November 4, 2025 at 6:43 PM
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[Enter Ghost.]
October 31, 2025 at 1:14 PM
After I started taking care of Dad last year, he learned that Halloween week means watching my fave witchy movies and you know what?

Dad loves this shit too!
October 30, 2025 at 12:37 AM
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POV you’re still not married and your grandparents just found the nicest boy with a good job they want you to meet
October 29, 2025 at 2:36 AM
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We interrupt your regularly scheduled doomscrolling for this dial-up timeline cleanse.

#DoomscrollingBreak
(solemnly) You've had mail.
October 1, 2025 at 3:36 AM
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The government is officially shut down. Make no mistake: Republicans control the House, the Senate, and the White House. This is THEIR shutdown. They had every tool to govern and chose chaos instead. The American people are the ones paying the price.
October 1, 2025 at 4:09 AM
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Leonard Cohen, getting over writer’s block
Alleluia may be added
September 26, 2025 at 11:46 AM
The funeral home called my mother to ask if she ever received the aftercare package for my uncle...

Who died *checks notes* almost 2 years ago...

This is the same funeral home that *checks notes again* cremated my mother last year...
a woman with gray hair is sitting in front of a sign that says por 10 on it
Alt: A gif of Bea Arthur as Dorothy from the Golden Girls, staring disappointingly.
media.tenor.com
September 16, 2025 at 8:07 PM
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"Severance" star Britt Lower wrote "Let Me Out" on her acceptance speech paper at the #Emmys, a shoutout to her Helly R character
September 15, 2025 at 2:16 AM
Hell yeah! His performance was *outstanding*
“Severance" actor Tramell Tillman has won the Emmy for outstanding supporting actor in a drama series. He is the first Black man ever to win the award #Emmys
September 15, 2025 at 1:27 AM
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If you'd like to support a trans woman author who's less than a month away from being laid off, you can do so by buying & reading my trans magical girl stories 🥹 "Magica Riot" is a full novel with a sequel nearly here! And there's a tie-in prequel novelette for that sequel, too! magicariot.com/buy
September 13, 2025 at 7:20 PM
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All I saw was cheesecake boat and ocean for at least 5 minutes
September 12, 2025 at 5:08 PM
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if they want to go back to the 1950s, we’re bringing the cuisine back to the 1950s too. you put me in the kitchen, I will spend 100% of my time in there finding how much horseradish and shrimp I can put in Jello before God personally comes down here to stop me.
January 24, 2025 at 9:26 PM
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Willett's Law of Morally Defensible Conspiracy-Peddling
my rules for perpetuating a conspiracy theory are:

1. no one is harmed either if it's true, or if it's false but everyone started acting like it was true

2. mostly goofy

3. punching up

4. fertile ground for meme generation

5. primary audience is other people who are also in on the joke
September 1, 2025 at 11:00 PM
*slow clap* perfection
This is one of the most beautiful things I have witnessed, the craft here is impeccable.
August 14, 2025 at 5:24 AM
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Must see TV here.
I laughed at this video for like 2 minutes straight last night and now you get to
July 27, 2025 at 2:59 AM
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Bonne Fete Nationale
July 14, 2025 at 1:56 PM
If you'd told me the morning after my 20th, 30th, or even 40th birthdays that I'd spend the morning after my 50th birthday happily tending to my tomatoes, I'd have told you to shut your filthy, lying mouth. But here we are.

However, I also had champagne and donuts after, because it is still me.
July 13, 2025 at 3:44 PM
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Skincare or ancient ritual? Yes.
July 7, 2025 at 8:04 PM
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“Congress” didn’t pass this murder budget.

Republicans did it.

Republicans did it without a single Democratic vote in the House, without a single Democratic vote in the Senate.

Be precise and give, uh, credit where credit is due
July 3, 2025 at 7:37 PM
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The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
July 4, 2025 at 1:31 AM
Absolutely nothing could've prepared me for that ending
I laughed so hard I dropped my phone into the abyss under the ottoman
July 2, 2025 at 1:37 AM
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When I met Ryan Coogler several years ago, we were standing in a group of people chatting, when a woman with visible hearing aids walked up, and he casually began to sign the whole conversation so she could participate. She mouthed “thank you”. He nodded and just kept doing his thing.
June 30, 2025 at 9:38 PM