When I make coffee in the morning sometimes a bean bounces out of the grinder. I always track it down and, as I'm plucking it up from the counter, I flatly remind it, "No escape."
When trauma has conditioned you to feel shame for who you are, you learn to adapt by presenting a false self. This works in the short term - it shields you from abuse - but over time it teaches you to flee from yourself. Too often we swap one mask for another when we transition
its weird that this kind of post will inevitably gather bitter responses from some trans people on this site. like damn 4chan really did rot out some of your brains huh i do really hope in time "you shouldn't feel ashamed about who you are" becomes less of a controversial statement amongst trans ppl
even if the world is mean and cruel i still think there's good in accepting yourself
November 14, 2025 at 3:31 AM
When trauma has conditioned you to feel shame for who you are, you learn to adapt by presenting a false self. This works in the short term - it shields you from abuse - but over time it teaches you to flee from yourself. Too often we swap one mask for another when we transition
It isn't your fault that you were shamed, neglected, and/or abused for who you are, but you owe it to yourself to learn to accept your true self, rather than trying to force yourself to be something you can never be. Don't let your abusers define your relationship with yourself
Trans girl who learned at her most formative vulnerable age that she has to hide her true nature for her own survival voice: I wish I was cis
November 14, 2025 at 3:46 AM
It isn't your fault that you were shamed, neglected, and/or abused for who you are, but you owe it to yourself to learn to accept your true self, rather than trying to force yourself to be something you can never be. Don't let your abusers define your relationship with yourself
To be completely clear: I struggle desperately to accept a lot of things about myself. I wouldn't have DID if I didn't. It's intensely difficult, but every step I take toward loving myself for who I really am instead of who I thought I was or want to be makes me happier, and makes life easier
November 14, 2025 at 4:05 AM
To be completely clear: I struggle desperately to accept a lot of things about myself. I wouldn't have DID if I didn't. It's intensely difficult, but every step I take toward loving myself for who I really am instead of who I thought I was or want to be makes me happier, and makes life easier
There's a lot of grief involved, too. A lot of things I thought about myself that are so hard to let go of. But it's better to grieve a false ideal and move on than it is to cling to a self-concept that leaves you trapped and suffering
Love yourself
November 14, 2025 at 4:05 AM
There's a lot of grief involved, too. A lot of things I thought about myself that are so hard to let go of. But it's better to grieve a false ideal and move on than it is to cling to a self-concept that leaves you trapped and suffering
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
November 14, 2025 at 4:18 AM
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
Most things worth doing are investments. You, today, will never see the payoff for them. A future version of you who is fundamentally different from the you of today is the person who will benefit from your efforts. If you've treated her well, she'll be so grateful to you 💞
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
November 14, 2025 at 4:20 AM
Most things worth doing are investments. You, today, will never see the payoff for them. A future version of you who is fundamentally different from the you of today is the person who will benefit from your efforts. If you've treated her well, she'll be so grateful to you 💞
Most things worth doing are investments. You, today, will never see the payoff for them. A future version of you who is fundamentally different from the you of today is the person who will benefit from your efforts. If you've treated her well, she'll be so grateful to you 💞
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
November 14, 2025 at 4:20 AM
Most things worth doing are investments. You, today, will never see the payoff for them. A future version of you who is fundamentally different from the you of today is the person who will benefit from your efforts. If you've treated her well, she'll be so grateful to you 💞
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
November 14, 2025 at 4:18 AM
Self-acceptance isn't a thing you just click your fingers and do. It isn't a one-and-done attitude adjustment. It's a skill, a practice, a habit. It's a thing that you learn by doing it, and you get better at it as you go, and you'll never be perfect at it. It's an investment in your future self
Yeah, and to tie it back into the larger discussion, a lot of the mean, self-hating stuff that gets passed around between trans fems is often framed as "tough love" necessary to not becoming one of the 'bad' trans fems.
November 14, 2025 at 4:12 AM
Yeah, and to tie it back into the larger discussion, a lot of the mean, self-hating stuff that gets passed around between trans fems is often framed as "tough love" necessary to not becoming one of the 'bad' trans fems.
To be completely clear: I struggle desperately to accept a lot of things about myself. I wouldn't have DID if I didn't. It's intensely difficult, but every step I take toward loving myself for who I really am instead of who I thought I was or want to be makes me happier, and makes life easier
November 14, 2025 at 4:05 AM
To be completely clear: I struggle desperately to accept a lot of things about myself. I wouldn't have DID if I didn't. It's intensely difficult, but every step I take toward loving myself for who I really am instead of who I thought I was or want to be makes me happier, and makes life easier
It isn't your fault that you were shamed, neglected, and/or abused for who you are, but you owe it to yourself to learn to accept your true self, rather than trying to force yourself to be something you can never be. Don't let your abusers define your relationship with yourself
Trans girl who learned at her most formative vulnerable age that she has to hide her true nature for her own survival voice: I wish I was cis
November 14, 2025 at 3:46 AM
It isn't your fault that you were shamed, neglected, and/or abused for who you are, but you owe it to yourself to learn to accept your true self, rather than trying to force yourself to be something you can never be. Don't let your abusers define your relationship with yourself
When trauma has conditioned you to feel shame for who you are, you learn to adapt by presenting a false self. This works in the short term - it shields you from abuse - but over time it teaches you to flee from yourself. Too often we swap one mask for another when we transition
its weird that this kind of post will inevitably gather bitter responses from some trans people on this site. like damn 4chan really did rot out some of your brains huh i do really hope in time "you shouldn't feel ashamed about who you are" becomes less of a controversial statement amongst trans ppl
even if the world is mean and cruel i still think there's good in accepting yourself
November 14, 2025 at 3:31 AM
When trauma has conditioned you to feel shame for who you are, you learn to adapt by presenting a false self. This works in the short term - it shields you from abuse - but over time it teaches you to flee from yourself. Too often we swap one mask for another when we transition
Hi y'all I very prematurely closed my old gfm and I've started a new one. Things are quite dire and it's looking like I'm going to need to hire a lawyer which I can't afford. Your help would mean the world to me truly.
Hi y'all I very prematurely closed my old gfm and I've started a new one. Things are quite dire and it's looking like I'm going to need to hire a lawyer which I can't afford. Your help would mean the world to me truly.
rorschach tests are cool in concept but in practice i don't really see the point in showing me 17 images of tall and strong women calling me a dumb slut
November 13, 2025 at 10:01 PM
rorschach tests are cool in concept but in practice i don't really see the point in showing me 17 images of tall and strong women calling me a dumb slut
doll girls are so silly. like "oh i identify with being a poseable plaything that anyone can do whatever they want to but you have to be soooo nice to me" are you stupid? shut up? open your legs?
November 13, 2025 at 7:00 PM
doll girls are so silly. like "oh i identify with being a poseable plaything that anyone can do whatever they want to but you have to be soooo nice to me" are you stupid? shut up? open your legs?