Clint Eastwood Gacy
@lukehaines85.bsky.social
Drinker, writer, gambler, dog butler. He/him/hey asshole. Occasionally manages to write something on Buttondown, and somewhat more frequently a podcaster for The Arts Hole.
buttondown.com/TheHainesReport
https://theartshole.podbean.com/
buttondown.com/TheHainesReport
https://theartshole.podbean.com/
I really don't understand what the product is trying to say...
You stood on the shoulders of giants to achieve a sandwich filling, and now you've patented it, packaged it, slapped it on a plastic lunchbox...
Pork... Finds a way.
You stood on the shoulders of giants to achieve a sandwich filling, and now you've patented it, packaged it, slapped it on a plastic lunchbox...
Pork... Finds a way.
November 12, 2025 at 9:50 PM
I really don't understand what the product is trying to say...
You stood on the shoulders of giants to achieve a sandwich filling, and now you've patented it, packaged it, slapped it on a plastic lunchbox...
Pork... Finds a way.
You stood on the shoulders of giants to achieve a sandwich filling, and now you've patented it, packaged it, slapped it on a plastic lunchbox...
Pork... Finds a way.
Okay, so is this robot allowed to use lethal force? If, as in Robert's example, Gacy goes to grab a child, is it allowed to shoot him? Because that's a murder bot, Elon...
November 11, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Okay, so is this robot allowed to use lethal force? If, as in Robert's example, Gacy goes to grab a child, is it allowed to shoot him? Because that's a murder bot, Elon...
It's literally fucking Armistice Day and Britain is promising to defend Belgium from foreign aggressors. Time is a flat circle.
November 9, 2025 at 5:11 PM
It's literally fucking Armistice Day and Britain is promising to defend Belgium from foreign aggressors. Time is a flat circle.
SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE STOPPED MEANING IT BY THE SECOND PROMPT!!! Even his own billion dollar AI is sick of him!
November 8, 2025 at 5:43 PM
SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE STOPPED MEANING IT BY THE SECOND PROMPT!!! Even his own billion dollar AI is sick of him!
If you've ever wondered how close you can get to a lawsuit without actually triggering one - a kind of Law Edging, if you will - then this place seems determined to find out.
November 7, 2025 at 4:54 PM
If you've ever wondered how close you can get to a lawsuit without actually triggering one - a kind of Law Edging, if you will - then this place seems determined to find out.
Go home, Doritos, you're drunk...
November 4, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Go home, Doritos, you're drunk...
Solid work from a house near me.
October 31, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Solid work from a house near me.
Why does this picture make it look like Trump is the wacky neighbour in a sitcom?!
"Did somebody say 'fat, orange racist' ?!"
"Did somebody say 'fat, orange racist' ?!"
October 14, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Why does this picture make it look like Trump is the wacky neighbour in a sitcom?!
"Did somebody say 'fat, orange racist' ?!"
"Did somebody say 'fat, orange racist' ?!"
And Ian Watkins has been murdered in jail. Everywhere you look, paedophiles are having a bad day...
October 11, 2025 at 8:14 PM
And Ian Watkins has been murdered in jail. Everywhere you look, paedophiles are having a bad day...
"Strong, Secure & Reliable!"
"Fragile!"
Make your mind up, assholes...
"Fragile!"
Make your mind up, assholes...
October 10, 2025 at 8:38 PM
"Strong, Secure & Reliable!"
"Fragile!"
Make your mind up, assholes...
"Fragile!"
Make your mind up, assholes...
Look at this ad and tell me Robbie Williams isn't planning on fingering that cat.
September 27, 2025 at 5:37 PM
Look at this ad and tell me Robbie Williams isn't planning on fingering that cat.
Saw a rose in someone's garden that looks like a miserable face.
September 21, 2025 at 7:25 AM
Saw a rose in someone's garden that looks like a miserable face.
You used to get proper circus acts, back in the day. Just firing a live panther right at a guy. That was it. That was the act.
September 17, 2025 at 8:54 AM
You used to get proper circus acts, back in the day. Just firing a live panther right at a guy. That was it. That was the act.
Anytime Fitness closed near me, and booked it out of town so fast they left the remains of their sign on the kerb. I guess the name is because they could disappear at Any Time?!
September 16, 2025 at 9:10 AM
Anytime Fitness closed near me, and booked it out of town so fast they left the remains of their sign on the kerb. I guess the name is because they could disappear at Any Time?!
Pringles tubes apparently no longer have metal bottoms, and the world continues down the worst of all possible paths...
September 13, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Pringles tubes apparently no longer have metal bottoms, and the world continues down the worst of all possible paths...
"'Sup?" -Rapunthel. Or maybe Rapunchel.
September 12, 2025 at 8:04 PM
"'Sup?" -Rapunthel. Or maybe Rapunchel.
...how would that even work?!
September 9, 2025 at 2:01 PM
...how would that even work?!
Chocolate mushrooms from Japan prove, once again, that they're years ahead of us out there.
August 22, 2025 at 5:30 AM
Chocolate mushrooms from Japan prove, once again, that they're years ahead of us out there.
You can run on for a long time... But sooner or later, God'll cut you down...
August 7, 2025 at 5:51 PM
You can run on for a long time... But sooner or later, God'll cut you down...
[Signs] "You up?"
August 6, 2025 at 7:43 AM
[Signs] "You up?"
Just when I couldn't hate James Patterson any more - when I'd spent years thinking he was a shameless, exploitative hack - I find out that the talentless, worthless fuck wrote a JOKE BOOK. Which he didn't even write himself, because of course he didn't! And yes. It's the same JP. I checked.
July 26, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Just when I couldn't hate James Patterson any more - when I'd spent years thinking he was a shameless, exploitative hack - I find out that the talentless, worthless fuck wrote a JOKE BOOK. Which he didn't even write himself, because of course he didn't! And yes. It's the same JP. I checked.
Not a @1900hotdog.bsky.social competition entry, just a van I saw that is obviously going to kill me.
July 3, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Not a @1900hotdog.bsky.social competition entry, just a van I saw that is obviously going to kill me.
Temptation, thy name is abandoned pogo stick...
July 1, 2025 at 12:42 PM
Temptation, thy name is abandoned pogo stick...