"your body's a temple" yeah it's for dionysus, let's fuckin party bitch

Ima just sit here and wait for a train to hit me

Average Nekomata wipeout screen

Oops i’m unintentionally spontaneously convulsing it must be time to eat

When you realise that MILFs are no longer MILFs and just, in fact, women your age.

If someone became 100% androgynous, would they be a themboy?

My ears are dyslexic, or I have a dirty mind.

Probably both.

Friend just said "Christmas time", and I heard "Christmas Hentai".

Needless to say, a new kink was born in me today.

If vampires can't come inside without permission, does that mean I could eternally ride one without risk of future motherhood?? Asking for a friend.

I'm gonna see what happens if I take all my medication for the week at once. I'll update you all with what happens.

I would come down to your level, but I am not quite as fond of being on my knees as much as you are.

The difference between me and vampires is that i can eat garlic (because i aint no bitch) and that when vampires drink blood, it's for their survival. When I drink blood, it's just because a cardiovascular whore.

Due to the constant rotation of the Earth, and a man's "morning wood", there is a constant crowd wave of cocks circling the planet.